I know it's been so long that you've probably all forgotten, but it's Way Back When-sday again!!!! Woohoo!!
Today we're looking into the not-so-distant past, to two thousand and nine in the year of our Lord. (Isn't that like the really proper way to say it? Something like that. 2009. AD.)
At approximately this time in 2009, life was good. We were taking a much-needed vacation: a cruise through the Western Caribbean! I blogged a detailed review of that trip back when it happened, so if you need lots of details and pics you can just check that out.
For now, I just want to reminisce on a few select photos and make myself sad thinking about how I wish I were on a cruise NOW. Cruises are the best. If you've never been on one, you should go. Actually, now that I think about it...we should go on one again this year. We went in 2007 and 2009. To stick with an every-other-year pattern, we definitely need to squeeze one in before 2011 slips away. Mental note.
Reasons Why Cruises Are Awesome:
Because you get to pose with palm trees.
Because you can do this all day if you feel like it.
And if you get bored, you can do something different! There is no shortage of options on a cruise ship.
You can dress up for dinner (that you don't have to cook, pay for, or clean up after).
Someone else cleans your room and makes your bed and puts cute towel-animals on it every day.
That should about convince you. Book your cruise today! (Carnival and/or any other cruise lines, if you would like to compensate me for this review and/or offer me a free cruise to review in the future...by all means, let me know)
WOW, you are going to be thanking me for this one. Thanking me for giving you a wonderful new way to waste your day, that is. Check out the funniest blog ever:
Bedtimes are for Suckers: the only blog written by a pissed-off 5-year-old
It is freakin hilarious. I'd like to thank the AJC for bringing my attention to this gem today.And I would also like to thank the completely unintelligent commenters who clearly have no concept of satire and actually believed it was written by a 5-year-old. It's folks like you who give the rest of us in the South a bad name...
Please be warned: the language on this blog is not...shall we say..."safe for the whole family." Like, don't read it out loud to your five-year-old.
That is all. I'll let you get to your reading. You're welcome!!
Yall. Way to come through on a Saturday post and remind me that I'm not all alone in the world blogosphere-on-a-Saturday. Obviously the key, I'm telling myself, is to pose a critical moral dilemma and ask for advice. I'll try to schedule more of those in the future. For the record...to appease all of your wondering minds on "baked bean-gate"...I did not tell the lady. I know. I'm a horrible person. I said "thank you!" and went on my merry way. Several times. EEP! I've tried to convince myself I'm not that bad since I normally over-share about cooking cheats, clothing deals, etc...I just took the easy way out this once.
For the record, the beans in question-- aka the only beans you should ever bother buying again for the rest of your life, unless you shop at the same Publix that I do, in which case don't even THINK about buying out the shelf because I have dibs already-- are these:
Seriously, just looking at this pictures makes my mouth water. THEY ARE SO GOOD. And frequently BOGO at Publix, so that doesn't hurt!
Alright, onto what this blog is ACTUALLY about. Clothes.
You may remember that I went shopping on Saturday. When I came home, I decided to bite the bullet and go through my wardrobe, getting rid of stuff I don't wear anymore. I've realized in the past few months that my closet is PACKED...and yet I wear basically the same things all the time. So obviously I'm hanging on to a lot of stuff that wouldn't pass the haven't-worn-it-in-a-year test. Or even my personal variation on that test, the "haven't-worn-it-in-3-years-and-wouldn't-even-if-it-fit" test (copyrighted). Since this is my test standard, you can see how I end up with so much crap in my closet. "Haven't worn that in a long time...but I might if it fit...so it's a keeper!"
I'm very liberal with my closet politics.
ANYWAY. So the fact that I managed to pull out a BIG OL STACK of clothes to get rid of is really something. Matt looked very amazed. He's never seen this volume of clothes vacate the premises before! (Or maybe he overheard me musing...if I'm getting rid of 8 pairs of jeans, I can easily buy 3 new pairs to replace them, right?? Right!) ("replace," even though I haven't worn any of the aforementioned jeans in like 4 years and they've already been replaced by the millions of jeans I'm not getting rid of) (my logic is flawless). Ahem.
So have any of you ever happened upon a blogger having a "clothing sale"? It's kind of like an online yard sale. I've seen them a few times on fairly popular blogs written by fashionable, skinny, rich girls. Apparently they clean out their (extra huge) closets sometimes, too! You know, to make room for this season's must-haves. And then they happen upon tons of amazing, still-fashionable, never-or-rarely worn items that they just don't need anymore...and so they post them on their blogs, make up a price, and people (apparently) just BUY THEM via paypal or something! Awesome, right??
I thought about finding one of these and linking to it, but then I would feel really bad if the blogger linked back to me and saw me making fun. I'm not really making fun..because I certainly enjoy these posts and if I ever happened upon the right item at the right price (and the right size), I would certainly bid...after all, I shop at real live yard sales with great regularity. So I'm not mocking these things. I'm just amazed at the fact that they have clothing that's worth all this trouble.
Typically, their online clothing sales look something like this:
Right here, imagine an artful photograph, reminiscent of an upscale catalog, of whatever item is for sale. A sweater, draped on some gorgeous fabric or hung on a mannequin. Sometimes the blogger even models it.
Then there's the description/commentary. Marc Jacobs geometric print jersey dress, size 4. Like new condition. I'm 5'4 and it hits right above the knee. Originally paid $750. Asking $225.
Then there's another picture, this time a close-up zoom on the tag/label. See, it really is a size 4!! It really is Marc Jacobs!! I'm not pulling the wool over you on this one!
If, for some reason, there is a flaw (God forbid) in the item, there will be close-up photos and descriptions. Tiny, light brown tan stain (BBQ sauce) from weekend in the Hamptons on hemline. Barely noticeable. This way you won't be sketched out or surprised when your eyes happen upon the abomination. Full disclosure.
And then...there are more items. And more items. And they're all beautiful, in great condition, and for sale. And the funny thing is that any ONE item would be greater than/more expensive than/more fashionable than EVERYTHING IN MY WARDROBE COMBINED. And yet this girl has like 30 of them that she needs to rid herself of.
Different strokes, I guess.
SO! As I was collecting my stacks of stuff to get rid of, I decided to dig through and see if there was anything worth not just donating to Goodwill or throwing in the trash (seriously, I'm sure Goodwill does not want my old, disgusting, holey, sweat-stained workout tees). You know, stuff that still had some life in it that I could pass on to friends or family. Or...you know...have a really pretentious (fake) blog clothing sale with!! Brilliant. So here we go. Get excited. Here's the Best of Erika's Closet:
First up, this perfectly fabulous manager's polo from my last job. Incredible that I've been hanging on to this puppy for 4 years, isn't it?? Obviously you can see why:
A lovely shade of turquoise, this Jerzee brand polo (size Adult Small) will nicely compliment any jeans or khakis. Slight makeup stainage on the collar, and those tiny holes on the bottom of the shirt where I guess it snagged on my belt.
A steal at $0.25!!
Next, we have a lovely white button-down from Kohl's.
This Apt. 9 brand shirt (size small) has tiny dots all over it, which surely has a term in the fashion world that I don't know. Shirt fashionably gapes across the bustline (if you're me). Although it may be hard to tell in the picture, shirt comes complete with lovely permanent pit-stains and collar discoloration!
Yours for the low, low price of $0.50!!!
Now don't all swamp me at once with your orders. I don't even have my Paypal set up yet! But don't worry, there are plenty more worthless clothing items just WAITING to be artfully displayed on the blog! (Also, for you men-folk, Matt is getting rid of about 20 pairs of boxers. Assorted colors/designs, size Medium!)
So...yeah. I had a good laugh thinking about selling my lame, non-fashionable, more-or-less-ruined clothing. And now I just have a big pile of it sitting on the floor in my room until I get up the initiative to put it in my car and take it somewhere. Sigh. I need a personal servant for this type of thing.
Blogging on a Saturday is a silly and pointless and desperate thing to do. In my three-ish years of blog experience, Saturday is the absolutely WORST day to post. Apparently I'm the only human on the planet who reads blogs on Saturdays. If anyone else does, they don't come to MY blog, and they certainly don't comment.
But whatever. Good thing I don't have anything very important to share. Or do I?
#1: This morning we had a meeting at church. After the meeting ended, Matt convinced me that we should go shopping in Commerce since we were practically "in the neighborhood." Apparently distance is relative, since Commerce (home of a Tanger Outlet mall) is like 20 miles away (which is a far distance by our standards). But whatever. He's been begging to go shopping in Commerce for like 2 weeks. You don't have to twist my arm.
So we go to Commerce. Lucky for me, Matt decides he doesn't need a thing and only wants to spend time and money buying things for ME ME ME!!! So we spend a few hours engaging in some serious retail therapy, stimulating the economy, and filling up our car with bags of clothes, jewelry, and shoes for me. It was great fun and a great way to celebrate not dying this week.
Lest you think I'm too spoiled...trust me, we found some AMAZING sales (and had coupons to top that) at Loft and Gap. I was in heaven. Then on the other hand, I am at least somewhat spoiled. I don't know very many women whose husbands love to take them shopping like mine does. Did you know that two years ago, Matt used all of his birthday money buying me dresses?? It was the most ridiculously sweet thing ever. He had said he wanted to take me shopping to buy one dress. But then when we both really liked two dresses and couldn't decide, he decided we would just get both. And also a skirt. Because he's awesome like that.
Alright, so then we drive home and on the way pass a thrift shop I've never seen before (Matt claims to have known about it for a long time). We go there and it's AWESOME. I end up getting a big stack of books AND...drumroll...new rollerblades!!!! (And knee pads and a helmet) (for a total of $7) I fulfilled my lifelong dream of getting rollerblades a few years ago (at a yard sale), but they were too small and even though I've used them many times, they always KILL my feet. The ones I got today FIT! I am super pumped. So if anyone wants my too-small (probably a women's 8 or 9?) rollerblades, let me know. Or if you want to go rollerblading with me, let me know that too.
#2: Tonight we hung out with Matt's family and went swimming and cooked out. I brought baked beans to contribute. This other couple (I've never met them before) came for dinner, and the wife complimented the beans several times. She even said "you know, I NEVER eat baked beans except for at my Aunt Whoever's house...I have never liked them...but yours are SO GOOD!"
This is all great, but I faced a huge Moral Dilemma: Those beans were totally store bought. I mean, YES they are good...they are my favorite kind, that's why I buy them! But my contribution to that dish consisted of buying 2 cans, dumping them in a Pyrex, and heating them up in the oven.
Now: should I have told the lady that? I mean, here she is missing out on something her whole life that can be so easily obtained at any grocery store. Or...just bask in the glory and keep it a secret?
What do you think I did? What would you do??
#3: My sister-in-law Amy gave us a new (to us) laptop! She also gave us our first nephew a few weeks ago, which I think I have failed to mention on this blog. Party foul. Unfortunately, my inaugural nephew lives in the very faraway state of Vermont, so I have not seen him in person yet. But thanks to the new laptop and its WEBCAM, we will be able to Skype with baby Timmy (and Amy and Tom)!!! So as soon as we got home tonight we got ourselves a little Skype account and then went a little berserk trying to find people we know with Skype accounts. If you want to be my Skype friend, then please tell me what your Skype name is. I am the world's suckiest phone-pal, but I have high hopes that I will be better at Skype, since sitting in front of a computer is like a personal strength of mine.
Alright, well, that's all I had to say. Shopping. Baked beans. Skype. That was my Saturday. Hope yours was equally wonderful!
