in lieu of a nap...

What I want to be doing: napping


What I need to be doing: going to the gym


What I am doing: attempting to blog.


Surely blogging is like the midpoint or something on the productiveness scale (with a 0 being "taking a nap" and a 10 being "going to the gym"). Right? Right. Okay, maybe it's a 4.


I've been procrastinating blogging because I'm trying really hard to finish my 30 before 30 list (that yes, was supposed to be posted on Friday. The one that happened a few days ago.) but I am stuck on like 18 things. And 10 of them are books. So here's my cry for help: What things should I try to accomplish before I'm 30?? That gives me like 2.75 years or so (I turned 27 in December...check that math). As I've spent the past few weeks trying to make this list, I've realized that I'm not much of a goal-setter. I only like to set goals I know I'll be able to achieve. And I don't like the stress of "oh man I gotta do this" hanging over me. And uh, usually when I make a list (like things to do this weekend, stuff to clean, errands to run) I will include a thing or two that I've already done. Like if I already did the dishes before I started making my list, I'll go ahead and write "do the dishes" on my list just so I get to go ahead and cross it off. It makes me feel really productive. So would it be okay to throw in a few things like "get married" and "buy a house" and "adopt a super soft and brilliant dog"? That would make me feel a lot more confident that I can accomplish everything else on the list. Please share your thoughts on this matter.


So let's see. Friday night was fun-- we got to babysit Hudson!

We had lots of fun being pretend-parents. It is my life goal (oh!! put it on the list!!) to be Hudson's favorite person-that-isn't-his-parents. Therefore I have to spend lots of time convincing him how fun and awesome I am. I would consider 90% of Friday night to be successful in that respect-- until I tried to give him a bottle. Then he decided I was definitely not his favorite person ever and possibly am even out of the running. Hopefully we'll be able to recover from this set back. I would also like to point out that of the 15 pictures Matt took of Hudson and I, only two of them were even worth looking twice at. In one of them, I look good and Hudson looks a little strange. In the other, Hudson looks good and I look like a cheeseball. I chose to put others before myself by posting the one where Hudson looks cuter. So please just look at him and pretend I'm not there. Thanks.

On Saturday we took a nice day-trip to Augusta to visit my family and some friends! We had a great trip and got to see not only my parents but both of my siblings and their +1s. We also got to spend time with our friends the Gentrys who are currently living with my parents-- it was quite a party! We spent pretty much the entire day out on the back porch enjoying a fire (it's a family tradition) and lots of food. We came back late last night, tired and smelling of campfire-- a peaceful, memory-evoking combination.

Today we celebrated our church's 10th anniversary with a big birthday party after church. We had a lot of fun and I am so thankful for our church and what it's meant to us these past 2 and a half years. I am also thankful for the super-abundance of desserts that were brought today-- I took it as my personal mission to sample all of them, and by "sample" I mean "have at least one large serving." This is why my thing I need to be doing is going to the gym. It all makes sense, eh?

And now we're exhausted (had to set up and clean up from the birthday party) and watching basketball and trying to to get too nervous about the beeping "TORNADO WATCH" banner that keeps running at the bottom of the screen. If there's a tornado, do you think I am safer at the gym or in my house? If there's a tornado AND my house gets struck, don't you think I'll be glad I chose to eat a weeks' worth of calories in cake today? I won't need to forage for food for at least 2 days! And um...so what kinds of things should I accomplish before I turn 30? Help!

weekend update

First of all-- thank you so much for all your sweet comments on my last post. It means so much to me to know you guys are thinking of and praying for me, and your kind words and advice are priceless to me. Thanks for reminding me and truly helping me feel that I'm not alone.

I accomplished the many things on my list! The house got clean (although the day DID start by me causing the washing machine to flood the laundry room....and did I mention I was at home alone?? UGH!!!)...the errands got ran...and we still had time for a nice date night last night. So all in all, a success!

The shower today was a success too. Plentiful food and good times with some girls. As always, I really enjoy myself once people are out here, hanging out and such. It's just the getting ready part that makes me such a wreck! I will have to entertain more often to remedy this, I suppose.

One of the best long-term results of the shower? This bouquet of flowers! I bought them to decorate the dining room. Then I kept them. :) And they make me happy every time I look at them.


Since the shower ended, we've just been straightening up and trying to mentally prepare ourselves for another work week. And catching up on things on the DVR-- Marriage Ref, anyone?? HUH-larious.

Also, we ate dinner. I know you're jealous of this klassy menu: hotdogs and asparagus.

Don't pretend you haven't been there. We're not the only ones eating this random of meals, are we? What's a girl to do when you have both a half package of hotdogs and half a pound of asparagus that will go bad if they're not eaten? I can't waste something like that!

OH! I meant to add this in earlier. In reference to my blog last week (too lazy to go find it and make a link) about my stinky refrigerator/sauerkraut problem...you guys are geniuses. Also, you are haters. But I will address the geniuses first: I'm not sure WHICH tip it was that solved my problem, since I implemented all fifty tips at the same time, but it definitely worked! I'm guessing it was the combo of the NEW box of baking soda and the little bowl of vinegar? Whatever it was, I thank you that I now have a non-stinky fridge.

And all you sauerkraut haters? You're a vocal bunch, aren't you? Do you have some kind of anti-sauerkraut society or something?? Geez! Making me feel like such a freak sitting over here eating my stinky sauerkraut. Thank you to the 2 sisters out there eating with me in solidarity. :) For the rest of you-- don't knock it til you try it. Most of you admitted you've never even TRIED it, so...yeah! I think I've made my point here. Although I'm not really sure what it was.

So...what'd you eat for dinner? There might be a special prize if you can beat the culinary genius that was hotdogs with asparagus.

Might be. Don't hold your breath though.

to do: weekend ed.

Ugh. It's 7:49 on Saturday morning (my ONLY Saturday morning of the week, mind you...) and my "to do" list is a mile long. I knew it was coming-- it was like last Tuesday or something when Matt was pointing out "I feel like this weekend doesn't even count. It will be less relaxing than the WEEK." and THAT is a sad fate, my friends. If I don't have weekends to look forward to, what is there in life, really?

It's probably not that bad. And yes, I realize the irony that I'm griping about all the things I have to do and yet I sit here blogging and catching up on FB gossip. It's just who I am.

I'm hosting (hostessing?) a baby shower here tomorrow which is the reason I have 2891 things to do today...all of which involve cleaning, sweeping, vacuuming, and more cleaning. And as I clean, with the thought of people descending upon my homestead in like 30 hours, I naturally question every decorating/home design choice I've ever made. Sigh. Why am I so insecure? Why do I think people will judge me based on the fact that I've lived here 9 months and haven't decorated the guest bathroom or hallway yet? And we haven't finished putting down the transitional pieces between rooms yet? And some of our floors are messed up and we haven't the first clue what to do about it other than whine? And I hate the linoleum in the kitchen/dining room but we don't have the time or money to replace it with something better...will people really judge me for that? And why do I feel compelled to make excuses for all of the above ANY TIME someone comes over? Why can't I just leave well enough alone and keep in mind that probably no one but Matt and I notice these things in the first place?

So it's Saturday and Matt's at work and cleaning and dealing with my insecure self is all I have on the agenda. Oh, and grocery shopping. And guess what, it's going to be like 75 degrees today and I don't even know if I'll get to enjoy it....cause you KNOW I'm already all caught up on my yardwork. It definitely gets top priority all week long (when it's nice enough outside)!

We did make a point to enjoy our Friday night, though. We ate at the (one and only) Mexican restaurant in our little town and sat out on the patio to enjoy the nice weather. Then we went home and had a nice fire in our firepit in the backyard for the rest of the night, complete with s'mores. This is the 3rd weekend in a row we've spent a night sitting next to a fire...what is it about fire-sitting that is so compelling? Does anyone else enjoy this as much as we do? Want to come over and enjoy s'mores with us? (I'm much less insecure about my yard than my house, so this would be an ideal social situation, ha.)

I'm tired. I don't know if it's the time change or what, but I haven't slept well this whole week. Ugh.

Sorry if it seems like I'm just complaining. It's not really been that bad of a week and I'm sure this weekend will turn out to be better than I'm thinking. I'd like to chalk it up to hormones or something. I don't know how many of you read this article that I mentioned a few months ago, but I'd just like to say that this hope-despair cycle is emotionally/physically/spiritually/ENTIRELY exhausting. I'm at a place (again) where I feel so incredibly hopefully...and yet within that hope, I fully expect to be distraught again within the next few days. It's terrible. It SUCKS. I hate that my hope and my optimism are so darkened by the thought (and the reality, thus far) that it's not gonna happen. It HASN'T happened. You felt this hopeful last month, and it DIDN'T HAPPEN. Don't get your hopes up because then it makes the defeat harder. Expect nothing and you won't be surprised when that's what you get. I hate that this is how I feel. But I don't know how to feel any other way. It's easier during other parts of the "cycle"...easier to just feel hopeful. But at this point...when I know that within a day or two I will know the truth for certain...it's just more natural to feel negative. You know why? Because for the past 15 months, those negative thoughts were right. With that kind of track record, it's hard to believe that they won't be right again this time.

And with that bit of depressing realism for your Saturday morning, I leave you, my friends. Those floors aren't gonna mop themselves...and despite my greatest efforts to fashion little doggie shoes out of Swiffers and attach them to Lola's four feet....well, that hasn't really worked out, either, so I guess the Swiffering is up to me, too.

Enjoy your weekend.

stinky

Literally.

I'm on a never-ending quest for dinner ideas that are fast, easy, and healthy. (This seems like the most OBVIOUS statement ever. Is there anyone in the world that is NOT looking for those things? Someone who's anti-fast, easy, and healthy? But anyway.) On the evenings we go to the gym, we run a tight schedule-- get home from work, walk Lola, change, go to gym, come home, and it's easily 7:00 if not later. Me? I like to eat dinner about 5:30...so you can see how fitting the gym into my life has caused me to make some lifestyle sacrifices/changes. So by the time we get home, if there is not food in my extremely immediate future, well...I'm not sure what would happen, but it wouldn't be pretty. It takes everything I have to not stop at one of the 3,284 fast food restaurants that are in the same shopping center as the gym! So I'm always keeping my eyes out and ears open for food that I can either throw in the crockpot before we drive to the gym, or just anything that can go from freezer/fridge to table in 30 minutes or less.

A few weeks ago, while shopping at Publix (which is a pleasure) and picking out some turkey kielbasa (love), I happened to think about sauerkraut. Growing up, kielbasa and sauerkraut was a frequent dinner (with some cornbread on the side? oh YUM!) at my house. The nice thing about both kielbasa and sauerkraut is that they're both basically already cooked-- they just need to be heated...so you could do it in a pan/pot on the stove, or microwave (I guess? Never have) or like my mom did, in the crockpot. Sauerkraut is nothing but cabbage & vinegar and turkey kielbasa is extremely healthy, so the combination of these two also meets my criteria for being a somewhat nutritious dinner. After I got it in my head that I would purchase these things for a dinner that week, I noticed that they actually had sauerkraut right there in the refrigerator section next to the kielbasa-- apparently my mom didn't invent this combination of food! It was in clear bags...kind of like the bags you buy pre-washed salad in or something. My mom always bought sauerkraut in cans from the vegetable row, but this seemed to be about the same price, so in my head I thought maybe it would be fresher than the canned stuff-- so this is what I got.

Fast forward a few days. We haven't eaten our kielbasa/sauerkraut dinner just yet. One afternoon I notice that the fridge smells a little funny when I close it. I immediately assign blame to some milk that is like one day past its due date and toss the milk. The next day the odor is stronger. Suddenly it hits me-- the sauerkraut. Of COURSE. Yuck. No wonder my mom bought it in cans! Mind you-- I haven't OPENED the bag of kraut-- it's exactly the way I bought it. Evidently the cabbage and vinegar odor is stronger than the plastic bag. SKETCH. So we eat it that night (and it's delicious just the way I remember it).

The problem? Um, that was like 2 weeks ago. My fridge? Still smells like stank sauerkraut. As good as that stuff tastes, the smell leaves quite a bit to be desired. It really smells like curdled milk...and sweaty feet. All the things I like my fridge to smell like, really.

The thing is, what can I do about it? It's not like there was some spill or something that I can wipe up. My fridge is only like 8 months old and I've kept it pretty clean. I do already have the baking soda thingy in there...maybe I need to get a new box of baking soda? Is there a limit to how much stankiness baking soda can absorb?

Incidentally, as much as the stench of sauerkraut has been bothering me lately, I've never really considered it a "weird" food. I guess I realize that maybe not all people eat it? I mean, it's not really an integral part of any (American) dishes we normally eat, so I wouldn't expect people to like...keep it on hand or anything. But I wouldn't really think it's something people abhor or anything. But last week on Amazing Race, it was a food challenge! As in, eat this plate of sauerkraut before the time runs out. I mean, usually the food challenges involve like...fish heads. Fried scorpions. Pickled monkey feet. Nasty stuff, you know? Is sauerkraut really in the same category as all that?

Discuss amongst yourselves.

rainy thursday

Boo on you, rain. It's my day off (day one of two, actually)! Don't you know all the great things I could be doing outside today? Don't you? Things like filling up the new raised garden Matt built me with dirt...and planting stuff...and weeding my other beds...I mean, there are so many things. But no. It's raining. And coldish. So I'm stuck inside. Boo.

Actually, I probably wouldn't be doing that much weeding. Although I'm positive there are new weeds sprouting up every day...the problem is that I don't remember where all the actual flowers (or plants) are that are supposed to grow back from last year. Therefore I'm scared that I'll be pulling "weeds" that are actually....not. One day I will be a little more confident in my weed discernment, I'm sure.

I had a great weekend last weekend (is it really Thursday already? And I'm just now talking about last weekend? So slack...). The lovely Kristina came to visit for the weekend! In between photo shoots (her, not me) and a surprise baby shower (for her, again...not me...surprisingly) we managed to spend lots of time slothing (our area of expertise), talking, and eating. Eating what we cooked, since Kristina brought me the best present ever: the Pioneer Woman's Cookbook!!

Now this is a cookbook after my own heart. We made two recipes on Saturday. We started the day with Edna Mae's Sour Cream Pancakes which were FABULOUS and light and salty and everything a pancake should ever be. Don't be deterred by the presence of sour cream...it sort of just took the place of the milk and oil and I-don't-know-what-else-but-it-was-magic. Later that night we tackled Oatmeal Crispies which have quickly become my new favorite cookie recipe ever. Since you don't have to bake all the dough at once, we've been enjoying them freshly baked all week long. Yay for us-- not yay for my skinny jeans ambitions, but whatever.

Speaking of skinny jeans, Kristina made the jump and bought some JEGGINGS this weekend. I can't wait to see how she pulls them off. It was my suggestion, actually...since she complained that her maternity jeans all slide down too much and that leggings were the only comfortable pants to wear...I said hey, why not give jeggings a try? And so she bought some. The above pictures are actually of me in jeggings...hopefully Kristina will be able to look this hot.

Just kidding. Fooled ya! Not actually me.

I apologize for all the ripped-off-of-Google-Images pictures. I haven't taken a single photo this month. I had every intention of getting at least ONE snapshot of Kristina and I this weekend, but all the intentions in the world don't mean anything if you never pull out your camera. Sigh.

So now I have a four-day weekend ahead of me (it's my mini-Spring Break) and very few plans. I'm considering Swiffering my bathroom, but that's about it so far. I borrowed Julie & Julia and plan to watch that at some point. I certainly plan to find as many articles as I can about Lindsay Lohan and the E-Trade babies "scandal" so that I can spend as much time as possible making fun of her. Annnnddd...that's about it. Any suggestions of other things I should do? If you happen to have the PW Cookbook, what do you think I should cook next? What are your personal feelings about jeggings? Who are you pulling for on Biggest Loser?

All comments appreciated. I have a full rainy day ahead of me and nothing to do. Help a sister out!