Tuesday, April 12, 2016

crying-laughing emoji face for days

Nobody warned me that twenty months was going to be such a hilarious age, but I'm here to tell you...it is. I mean, if I were to try to represent Millie's life in emoji, then I would say that the first 19 months were mostly the heart-eyes emoji. And right about now, the crying-laughing emoji is starting to catch up fast. (I bet that in 40 years, the previous two sentences will make NO SENSE.) (Or maybe they will make PERFECT SENSE because by that time, all written language will be completely gone and the whole world will only communicate via emoji.) (Praise hands!)

Let me convince you that Millie is the funniest baby ever.

Exhibit A:

On Sunday morning, we took her into worship with us at church instead of leaving her in the nursery. She likes the music, and I like spending more time with her, so sometimes it works out (until she gets too antsy, and then it's off to the nursery). So Millie's doing great, clapping and "singing" and dancing, and then the band wraps up a song and there's a brief moment of near-silence in the room as they prepare for the next song. During that time, Millie happened to notice a gentleman a few rows in front of us. He was sitting down, and his head was bowed in prayer or quiet contemplation. Or that's what an adult might think he was doing, anyway. Not our Millsie, though. "NIGHT-NIGHT!!!! NIGHT-NIGHT!!!!" she screamed, pointing to the guy. "NIGHT-NIGHT!!"

That wasn't embarrassing at all.


Unrelated picture, but I think she likes the azaleas as much as I do!

Exhibit B (warning- involves poop talk): 

While we are far from doing anything I'd consider "potty training," I will say that Millie enjoys sitting on the potty and seems to actually prefer pooping on the potty to pooping in her diaper. She'll say "poop poop!!" and hold her bottom while running to the bathroom, and about half the time, she'll follow that up with...ya know, poop poop. In the potty. It's pretty great! (But for the record, she has never once peed in the potty. Apparently that's not nearly as much fun or something.) So even though she seems to just enjoy pooping in the potty for the heck of it, at one point in time I gave her a piece of candy after a successful poop. You know, as a congratulations or something. Well naturally, now she associates the potty with candy (or "nandy," in Millie-speak), so she's even MORE enthused about the whole thing. But I only give her "nandy" if she actually poops. If she just sits there and doesn't do anything, she gets excited praise and songs and high fives and she can put a piece of toilet paper in the potty (SO FUN), but she doesn't get candy. 

Sorry, that was a long build-up.

So the other night, Millie starts frantically grabbing her bottom and yelling "poop poop!!" and running to the bathroom, so I rush her in there and get her settled. Her face is the picture of concentration as she focuses on the task at hand, and she's even clenching her fists as she works on it. After about 10 seconds, a significant noise erupts from her, and her eyes light up as she says "POOP POOP!!! NANDY!!! NANDY, MAMA?!!" and I cheer and holler and congratulate her and assure her that we will get a piece of candy when she's done. I encourage her to sit there for a little longer to make sure she's all done, and sure enough, after another few seconds, another sound emerges. She is once again super excited and repeats "poop poop!! Nandy!!", and I again agree. So now she tells me 400 times that she's alldonealldonealldone, so I pull her off the seat. And we look down in the potty, and...it's empty. No poop poop. And her face just FALLS, and she looks so confused and devastated. "Poop poop?? Poop poop?" and I'm barely able to keep myself from falling over laughing over how sad she is and how loud her gas was that she fooled the both of us into thinking it was something more significant. "No poop poop, Millie, it was just tooties. It's okay. You did really good, and you thought it was poop poop. That happens sometimes!" She looks so sad, but she still looks up at me and says "nandy, Mama? Nandy?"

That sweet, adorable baby. She's nothing if not committed to earning a bite of candy! (Of course I gave it to her. Except for it turned out we had NO CANDY in the house, so it ended up being a bite of ice cream, which she deemed an acceptable substitute.)

Unrelated picture, but she also really likes corn on the cob.
Exhibit C:

No explanation is really needed for this one. I just watched her come out of my bathroom the other morning and this is what she was doing.

Apparently she's been taking notes when she watches me get ready!! Also, her eyelashes are already obscenely long and perfect. She will never need a contraption like this!

Lest you think her too much a "girly" girl, though...

Exhibit D:

While Matt and I were cleaning out the garage, Millie abandoned her sidewalk chalk and bubbles and took it upon herself to do something a little more...significant. I guess toys and bubbles are for babies or something.

Yes, she IS the best helper (and comedian) in the world, and no, she is NOT available for hire. Sorry. All mine!


  1. So I see wheelbarrow rides in the very near future. Kyle used to race around the yard pushing two kids at a time who were holding on for dear life and squealing for joy!!! I was the photographer and he was the, well, you know, pusher.

  2. It's true, the more they learn to talk, the more amusing they become! And sometimes the more sassy they become, but it seems Millie does not yet have a sassy bone in her body, so maybe you'll escape that?

  3. So funny. And you're so smart for writing this down--these are little treasures you swear you'll never forget, but sometimes life gets in the way and you do. Thanks for the smiles this morning!

  4. I could read blogs like this ALL day long!! I hope my little guy is funny too!! Keep em coming!! I also love Millie's fashion, too cute!!

  5. This post cracked me up and made me smile for the day....thank you! Such a cutie!

  6. Love the one of her curling her eyelashes!! Cute (and funny!) girl!

  7. Ahhhh!!! I was so excited to see a Millie post. She is getting so big and watching her little personality blossom is so fun. You should start a journal of Millie-isms. It's about to get amazing!!!

  8. Hahaha the poop story haha! A for effort for sure :P Her little pig tails eek! Thanks for sharing her hilarious stories!!! :)

  9. Drew has said very loudly 'Alleluia' during a completely quiet moment in church. Luckily our priest loves kids and looked over at us and laughed. Why are kids SO loud in church?? And better for gas on the potty and getting fooled that way than thinking you tooted in your pants and it be something else. Ha!

  10. So cute! I love that age. That's awesome about pooping on the potty. We did the Baby Whisperer thing of sitting them on it as soon as they could sit and like Millie is was hit or miss but they were never afraid of the potty. Both kids (boy and girl) were potty trained shortly after turning 2!

  11. Oh my gosh! She is so cute! I laughed out loud at the eyelash curler pictures. So funny!

  12. i laughed way too hard at the poop story, love it!!!

  13. I'm catching up on blogs, and this one had me rolling!! :cry laughing emoji face:
    Your story about Millie at church made me think of when my dad was at mass, sitting behind our friends and their 2 year old son (Henry) My dad tends to nod off all during mass, and that was when Henry, during a very quiet part, looked at my dad and shouted "PAPA VICTOR IS SLEEPING!!" - Henry's parents were mortified, but my dad LOVES to tell this story. So funny!

  14. Rachel always picked the "quiet time" during congregational prayer to start talking really loudly. And yes, I was never embarrassed either. In fact, she still does it -- on those Sundays I haven't sent her off to the nursery, that is!

    It took Sam over four years how to figure out how to poop in the potty so Millie is obviously a GENIUS!!!

    And if Millie ever decides to hire herself out I'm getting fairly tired of lawn mowing already (and we've basically only had to do it like three times so far) so I'd pay her. I'd maybe even cover her travel expenses!


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