dentists, math, and the butchering of the english language

I survived the dentist yesterday.

But I didn't like it. Don't get me wrong.

Luckily, there were no cavities to report. And the hygienist (a male, I might point out. My dentist office is so progressive- a male hygienist and a female dentist! What glass ceiling, Athens?? Haha) even complimented my 'big ol' horse teeth,' as Matt so graciously puts it. He said he would have expected them to be worse after two years away. So I feel like that was a compliment? Maybe I have low standards. Anyway, he did give me the requisite 30-minute long lecture about flossing as he stabbed away with his silver stabby thing. At least he didn't ask questions, though. This guy must have been top in his class- he realized that people can't respond when their mouths are full of hands and stabby things! Genius.

It did give me time to meditate and think about the topic at hand, though. Flossing. Like...eww. I know I should do it more often. Daily, even, as ol' Mr. Hygienist would say. I just don't. Then I was like 'maybe I should try for 30 days! If I do it every day for 30 days, won't it be a habit? I can do 30 days. A 30 Day Floss Challenge!!' And then I had this great idea to make it a social media 'thing,' like every other 'challenge' or daily thing that everyone reports in on and hashtags and what not? I mean, that's great accountability, right? And wouldn't you just love for your Instagram feed to be full of used dental floss??? HAHAHA. Lucky for you I nixed the idea pretty fast. If I do the 30 Day Floss Challenge, I'll keep it to myself. Well, myself and my dentist. I feel like this is the kind of thing dentists would get really excited about, so I'll be sure to share the news with them.

Alright...anyone else finding that their calendar for the next few weeks is dictated by Ulta's amazing '21 Days of Beauty Steals'?? No, just me?

Every day there's a 'daily steal' that is (generally) AWESOME and a truly good deal. They change every day. This means that if you want to capitalize on the three weeks...you find yourself needing to go to Ulta a lot of days. I'm sure this was the point of the whole thing, but like...sheesh. Twist my arm. What a tragedy to have to go to Ulta so many days. Matt has taken to asking "do we need to go to Ulta today?" every morning in the car. That there's a good man.

I'm also spending time trying to project my Ulta spending for the year to best capitalize on the new reward points system. Brightest Bulb in the Box (re)posted a really interesting article over the weekend that analyzes the new system. I generally avoid things that reek of math, but since this math actually applies to my life, I bravely read the whole thing and think that I mostly comprehend it. This is why I took calculus in college...so that when I was 31, I could get the most out of makeup reward programs. WOO! (PS. No actual calculus is involved in that article, but there is a graph.) Anyway, if you anticipate shopping at Ulta during the next year, you should check out Ulta Points: Spend or Save? A Mathematical Analysis.  

Finally, a brief rant. It's almost a grammar rant, but not technically grammar. In the past few weeks, I've found my eyes and ears repeatedly assaulted by people misusing a common phrase (conjunction). I've seen it on blogs, semi-legit news articles, and then the final straw-- ON the NEWS on TV last night. It's bothering me to the point that I can't stay quiet anymore...and also, there's a tiny part of me that thinks what if I am the one who's wrong? What if I am misusing and misunderstanding the way to use this phrase? But then...naaaah. So I'll rant away.

It's the use of the words "much less" when comparing two things. 

For example (correct examples, I believe), I might say "I can't run a mile, much less a marathon" or "I can't afford a McDonald's hamburger, much less a five-star dinner at Bacchanalia."

In my opinion, you're supposed to say the lesser/more generic of the two things you're comparing first. Then after the 'much less,' you say the more extreme or dramatic item. Right??

But lately I've been noticing people doing it backwards. Like "I can't read my Bible every day, much less twice a week." Huh? 

Last night on the news, the police officer they were interviewing did it. He was talking about a heinous double-murder in Atlanta allegedly committed by a 14-year-old (yikes...welcome to Atlanta??). He said "I can't believe a 14-year-old would be committing such a gory murder, much less any crime."

I mean, I almost fell off my treadmill. IT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE LIKE THAT!!! Does it?? Is this one of those things where now everyone agrees that using a word/phrase the completely opposite way is okay, like with 'literally'?? Because I'm not okay with that. This is the kind of thing that needs to go to a vote. Do you support using literally to also mean 'figuratively'? No, no I do not. Do you support using 'much less' to not mean 'much less' and make no sense at all? No. Not that, either. I can be open-minded about a lot of things, but NOT THIS.

Please tell me I'm not the only one.