Warning: Steam-of-consciousness type rambling to follow. There may or may not be any point to this whole thing. It's just stuff that was going through my head as I cleaned the house.
So for basically my whole life, or at least since I was 10 or so, my dad has been convinced I am "a writer." Erika is a writer, he would tell people. She's going to write books someday. My best friend and I wrote an original story (and typed it up on my typewriter, something all writers must own) in about 5th grade or so. It was called My Date with the Boogeyman and if I must say-- it was pretty awesome. My dad loves it, refers to it often, and still has the original copy in his office at home. Erika is a writer. This was her first book, and one day this thing's gonna be worth money. In high school, when I was debating colleges, he had two requirements. A) I could go anywhere I wanted, but he would pay for Texas A&M (he and my mom are both alumni of that fine institution). B) He didn't care what I majored in, as long as I would write my book. He relented on the first requirement, since I went to UGA and he paid for it. He's never given up on that second one.
I started 'blogging,' although it wasn't called that, my senior year of high school. My parents knew about my "online diary," as they referred to it (which wasn't far off, since the site that hosted it was, in fact, called Open Diary), but they never (as far as I know) looked at it. So since they weren't reading it to keep up with my day-to-day activities, I would email them to keep them posted on my life. My dad loved my emails. He reportedly would print them out and read them to his co-workers and people at our church. I would come home for a weekend and people would be laughing at me over something I told my dad in a (private!!! I thought) email! I would chastise Dad for sharing my personal emails (about such exciting things as laundry and complaining about walking a thousand miles a day around campus since I didn't have a car) and he would tell me that you're a writer...people love to hear what you write. Keep writing, Erika!!!
Although my dad's high regard for my 'writing' was always sweet and flattering, I mostly thought it was all due to his slightly narrow and biased worldview. First of all: I'm his daughter. So he is bound to be a little biased about how 'good' my writing is. But more importantly, Dad has never really been a reader. He would occasionally read a book, but Mom was definitely the reader out of my parents. And I was a reader. I devoured books. I knew good writing. But Dad didn't read much, and so I figured that maybe compared to the boring crap he read when he did read (books about computer programming...or wars) I was probably pretty interesting. But when I compared myself to the books I was reading, or to even what my friends were writing on their blogs...I was just average.
And that led me today to thinking about how blogging has (or has it?) influenced the world of writing. We are inundated with people writing now. You don't have to be good, or funny, or know how to spell. Anyone, myself included, can write whatever they want and publish it for all the world to see. For free, with the click of a few buttons. Writing is for the masses, now...it's not limited to the Hemingways or the Steinbecks or the Shakespeares. And although there is certainly still a market for literature...or really, books about a TOPIC, or a STORY...I feel like the only genre of books that I would have ever qualified to write is not really a viable genre anymore. The "random thoughts from random people who don't really know much about anything" genre.
I think about David Sedaris, whose books I love. David doesn't write about anything in particular. He is a funny man who makes funny observations about life and can put it together in a way that is (what else?) funny and readable and enjoyable. And he sold books doing it. However...isn't that what a blog is? I tell stories, most of them about my own life, and insert my own commentary and flavor, and we're done. It's published. Only it's for free, on the internet, and so it's like...who would buy the book when you can see it online for free?
I read so many blogs. So many of them are written by talented writers, in my opinion, and they educate me and entertain me and I love it. But I think that by virtue of having 24/7 FREE access to all the funny writers and stories I could ever want to read...why would I want to buy a book that offers the same thing? I don't think that being a 'good writer' is enough to cut it in the world of book-writing today.
But Dad still doesn't get it. The last time I saw him, he was all So have you written your book yet? Are you working on it? And I was like Dad!! Seriously, I'm not writing a book. I don't have anything to write about! and he was like just write about your life. You make it sound so funny! And for the eleven millionth time, I said Hey Dad? I have a BLOG. I write on it SEVERAL TIMES A WEEK about my life. You can read it ANYTIME YOU WANT! And he says Oh yeah, I ran in to so-and-so in the Walmart last week and she said she looooooves your blog and you're so funny and so see, people think you're a good writer, so why don't you write a book? And I'm all you just don't get it. And he says Well can't you make money from blogging? (Which Matt asks me about 12 times a week as well) And I have to explain that yes, you can, but how some people manage to hit the money-making-blog jackpot is still a mystery to me and that surprisingly, major advertisers aren't really beating down my door to pay for ad space on my blog with 50 followers. Dad shakes his head in wonderment: how could the world be so cruel to his beloved eldest daughter who is so obviously supposed to be a writer?
But my dad is nothing if not an optimist-- I guess I'm a chip off the old block-- and so even in spite of the overwhelming evidence I've given him that I will probably never be a "real writer" and publish a book, he just shakes his head slowly, with a smile on his face, like You just don't get it yet, Erika. This is your DESTINY!!!! And I have to shake mine back, with a depressing little last jab: It's not gonna happen. The market for semi-decent writers who talk about nothing is saturated.
Like I said, this story has no point. It's just stuff I was thinking about as I was cleaning, and writing it down has let me put off said cleaning for another hour. My dad is coming up to visit today, so I'm sure I'll get a question or two about the status of my book-writing. And even in the face of the overwhelming evidence to the contrary, no matter what I say, Dad will just keep on believing that one day, I will write a book. He's my constant cheerleader. I guess that's part of what makes him such a good dad.
Friday, July 8, 2011
Wednesday, July 6, 2011
decades fondue
Subtitle: Elizabeth L., please still be my friend after you read/watch this.
As I perused photos, looking for inspiration for today's Way Back When-sday, I happened upon a folder of photos from approximately 2003. Labeled "Decades Fondue," the pictures are all from a 'decades'-themed fondue party my roommate Elizabeth and I hosted back in the day.
Please understand: Elizabeth and I are awesome party hostesses. Along with our house-mates Kristina and Catherine, "The 115" (as we were known) played host to many a fabulous theme party. So apparently Elizabeth and I were looking for excuses to wear funny costumes and eat fondue one weekend. Somehow, we convinced other people to join us in so doing. And we took pictures.
And then-- lo and behold-- at the end of the night, apparently after I'd already changed out of my costume and into scrubs (but Elizabeth hadn't)...we'd moved into slap-happy mode. And were acting out/singing (as we were often wont to do) duets from Moulin Rouge. And someone had the foresight to capture it on video. Which I am going to share with you. Because when I watched it myself, a a few minutes ago, for the first time in what- 8 years? I fell out of my chair laughing. And I want you to have that same opportunity.
Here we are, in all our decade-y glory. Please note that I am wearing a wig. Elizabeth is not.
I think my 'decade' was the 70s. Elizabeth's was maybe the 80s? But my clear plastic stripper shoes? Timeless.
Here we are outside our back door (see why they called us the 115?) with friends Robert and Dustin (in the background).
Me and Dusty, my main squeeze and obvious co-70s-appreciator.
And finally, the video. This will be well worth the next 53 seconds of your life. Although the first 25 seconds or so may seem a little dull, if you hang in there you can look forward to seeing me trip over my stripper heels and catching a glimpse of Elizabeth's thigh-high stockings as she curtsies. Also, please note our questionable home decorating ideas...every wall a different color! You will also get a sense of our general zest for life as you watch us crack up at ourselves (and hear our 'audience' do the same). This is why we were great roommates.
That is all. If you'd like an invitation to our next theme party, just let me know in the comments.
As I perused photos, looking for inspiration for today's Way Back When-sday, I happened upon a folder of photos from approximately 2003. Labeled "Decades Fondue," the pictures are all from a 'decades'-themed fondue party my roommate Elizabeth and I hosted back in the day.
Please understand: Elizabeth and I are awesome party hostesses. Along with our house-mates Kristina and Catherine, "The 115" (as we were known) played host to many a fabulous theme party. So apparently Elizabeth and I were looking for excuses to wear funny costumes and eat fondue one weekend. Somehow, we convinced other people to join us in so doing. And we took pictures.
And then-- lo and behold-- at the end of the night, apparently after I'd already changed out of my costume and into scrubs (but Elizabeth hadn't)...we'd moved into slap-happy mode. And were acting out/singing (as we were often wont to do) duets from Moulin Rouge. And someone had the foresight to capture it on video. Which I am going to share with you. Because when I watched it myself, a a few minutes ago, for the first time in what- 8 years? I fell out of my chair laughing. And I want you to have that same opportunity.
And finally, the video. This will be well worth the next 53 seconds of your life. Although the first 25 seconds or so may seem a little dull, if you hang in there you can look forward to seeing me trip over my stripper heels and catching a glimpse of Elizabeth's thigh-high stockings as she curtsies. Also, please note our questionable home decorating ideas...every wall a different color! You will also get a sense of our general zest for life as you watch us crack up at ourselves (and hear our 'audience' do the same). This is why we were great roommates.
That is all. If you'd like an invitation to our next theme party, just let me know in the comments.
Tuesday, July 5, 2011
good times with google
I hope yall don't think I'm copping out, but come ON. Google Analytics provides the FUNNIEST tidbits of information and I really feel I'd be remiss if I didn't share with all my friends. Besides, I haven't had a "Google Analytics"-themed blog since like...October. So we have lots to catch up on!! (And here's my plug for all you bloggers who DON'T use Analytics: GET IT. Yes, it's a hassle (if you're technologically-challenged) to figure out how to set it up. But there are plenty of online tutorials that will help you sort it out. It is SO WORTH IT!)
Alright. I'm only analyzing my results since 10/10/10, which was my last post about Analytics. To start with, my top 8 (and a bunch of higher numbers, too) top keyword searches (that is: the things people Google that leads them to click on this here blog) are all from people who obviously know what they're looking for. As I mentioned last time, these are the people who are unfamiliar with the idea of bookmarking or 'following.' They'd rather Google me every time they want to check the blog. That's cool, I won't judge you. Except for you people who seem to Google me EVERY DAY with my name MISSPELLED. That is not cool. Also, for the record, "mattyerika" is actually Matt y Erika. 'Y' is Spanish for "and." Matt and Erika. Although I do call Matt "Mattie," I always spell it with an 'ie.' Back in 2006 when we got engaged, I got all email-happy and decided we needed a joint email account. "mattanderika" at gmail was not available, so I looked deep inside my soul and dredged up some Spanish and voila. An email address-turned-blog address. I only say this because it tickles me all the people Googling "matty and erika". It's like "matt and and erika." Okay, moving on.
Okay, so folks found this blog via 228 different keyword combinations. Like I said, a bunch of them are stuff like "mattyerika blog" or my name or something like that. Boring. Let's check out the funny ones!! And since a lot of people are apparently coming here looking for the answer to very specific questions...let's see if I can answer them for you.
To the person who Googled beautiful doesn't even begin to describe her...obviously you came to the right place. Thanks!
But you, beautiful fried banana? Not sure if you found what you're looking for. Although I do appreciate a good fried banana now and then.
Now, chinese buffet next to trader joes on epps bridge parkway...you obviously were looking for something specific. And I hate to be the one to tell you that that buffet closed. I know, I was sad too. They had the best fried bananas ANYWHERE. (True story!!)
Coed college shower pictures? I hope you were talking about baby or wedding showers. Otherwise you were probably sorely disappointed.
Dear summer, please come quickly before I completely lose my mind. I couldn't agree more. I bet we could be friends.
Several people asked variations on "does kroger have wi-fi?" and I am happy to report (as you probably read) that apparently some of them do. Going to Kroger's actual webpage would probably get you more information than my blog, though.
Drug dealer car backed in reassured me that I am not alone in my thinking!
Dear excuses for parents finding beer bottles: I think a simple shrug and 'idunno' is all you need to convince them of your innocence.
High school chick flicks where quiet girl gets cool boy: REALLY not sure how this brought you to me, but I think you should rent She's All That.
I want to know if it's cold outside. Well I think you should go to weather.com. Just a thought. It would have required typing less letters.
These were oddly similar (spelling mistakes are from the original): Is 69 to cold for a 5 months baby to be outside and is it good to take baby outside in 20 degree. I would say no and no. Just my professional opinion.
Is it illegal to take a flower bush from a foreclosed upon house? I hope not!
Just relax and you'll get pregnant. No, you won't. But thanks for sticking around and reading fourteen pages of my blog! Hopefully I changed your mind about the aforementioned statement.
My day is a waste of life. Sad, but I guess everyone feels like that on some days.
There are always more pictures of firstborns. Do you regularly complain to Google? But you're right, there are. Luckily, I'm a firstborn, so I don't care.
What should you do when a drug dealer uses your driveway? Um...call the police? Run over him with your car? The options are limitless.
Why aren't all girls girly girls? Because then there would be no tomboys.
I could go on with these things for days, but I'll stop now (unless you want more. Just let me know!)
I've had visitors from 51 countries!!! Dang. I probably couldn't even name 51 countries (because I suck at geography).
My most popular content (not including my 'home' page, which is the vast majority of all visits. This just means content you had to click separately on to view.) was a Show Us Your Life carnival and my infertility label. Coming in next were a bunch of my Way Back When-sday posts...good to know yall like them!
Well I'm out of time, but Google Analytics is never out of funny information you didn't need to know. Until next time...I'm just going to go look at some awesome pictures of rarity and listen to some sweet background music for prom pictures. Yup, people actually Googled that.
Alright. I'm only analyzing my results since 10/10/10, which was my last post about Analytics. To start with, my top 8 (and a bunch of higher numbers, too) top keyword searches (that is: the things people Google that leads them to click on this here blog) are all from people who obviously know what they're looking for. As I mentioned last time, these are the people who are unfamiliar with the idea of bookmarking or 'following.' They'd rather Google me every time they want to check the blog. That's cool, I won't judge you. Except for you people who seem to Google me EVERY DAY with my name MISSPELLED. That is not cool. Also, for the record, "mattyerika" is actually Matt y Erika. 'Y' is Spanish for "and." Matt and Erika. Although I do call Matt "Mattie," I always spell it with an 'ie.' Back in 2006 when we got engaged, I got all email-happy and decided we needed a joint email account. "mattanderika" at gmail was not available, so I looked deep inside my soul and dredged up some Spanish and voila. An email address-turned-blog address. I only say this because it tickles me all the people Googling "matty and erika". It's like "matt and and erika." Okay, moving on.
Okay, so folks found this blog via 228 different keyword combinations. Like I said, a bunch of them are stuff like "mattyerika blog" or my name or something like that. Boring. Let's check out the funny ones!! And since a lot of people are apparently coming here looking for the answer to very specific questions...let's see if I can answer them for you.
To the person who Googled beautiful doesn't even begin to describe her...obviously you came to the right place. Thanks!
But you, beautiful fried banana? Not sure if you found what you're looking for. Although I do appreciate a good fried banana now and then.
Now, chinese buffet next to trader joes on epps bridge parkway...you obviously were looking for something specific. And I hate to be the one to tell you that that buffet closed. I know, I was sad too. They had the best fried bananas ANYWHERE. (True story!!)
Coed college shower pictures? I hope you were talking about baby or wedding showers. Otherwise you were probably sorely disappointed.
Dear summer, please come quickly before I completely lose my mind. I couldn't agree more. I bet we could be friends.
Several people asked variations on "does kroger have wi-fi?" and I am happy to report (as you probably read) that apparently some of them do. Going to Kroger's actual webpage would probably get you more information than my blog, though.
Drug dealer car backed in reassured me that I am not alone in my thinking!
Dear excuses for parents finding beer bottles: I think a simple shrug and 'idunno' is all you need to convince them of your innocence.
High school chick flicks where quiet girl gets cool boy: REALLY not sure how this brought you to me, but I think you should rent She's All That.
I want to know if it's cold outside. Well I think you should go to weather.com. Just a thought. It would have required typing less letters.
These were oddly similar (spelling mistakes are from the original): Is 69 to cold for a 5 months baby to be outside and is it good to take baby outside in 20 degree. I would say no and no. Just my professional opinion.
Is it illegal to take a flower bush from a foreclosed upon house? I hope not!
Just relax and you'll get pregnant. No, you won't. But thanks for sticking around and reading fourteen pages of my blog! Hopefully I changed your mind about the aforementioned statement.
My day is a waste of life. Sad, but I guess everyone feels like that on some days.
There are always more pictures of firstborns. Do you regularly complain to Google? But you're right, there are. Luckily, I'm a firstborn, so I don't care.
What should you do when a drug dealer uses your driveway? Um...call the police? Run over him with your car? The options are limitless.
Why aren't all girls girly girls? Because then there would be no tomboys.
I could go on with these things for days, but I'll stop now (unless you want more. Just let me know!)
I've had visitors from 51 countries!!! Dang. I probably couldn't even name 51 countries (because I suck at geography).
My most popular content (not including my 'home' page, which is the vast majority of all visits. This just means content you had to click separately on to view.) was a Show Us Your Life carnival and my infertility label. Coming in next were a bunch of my Way Back When-sday posts...good to know yall like them!
Well I'm out of time, but Google Analytics is never out of funny information you didn't need to know. Until next time...I'm just going to go look at some awesome pictures of rarity and listen to some sweet background music for prom pictures. Yup, people actually Googled that.
Monday, July 4, 2011
independence and all that
We just got back from a wonderful weekend hanging out with the Gurleys and the Moores. On Friday morning, we loaded up the minivan (complete with turtle-top luggage carrier! Van and carrier were courtesy of Matt's parents) and trekked down south to Statesboro, home of oppressive heat and a ridiculous number of constantly-swarming gnats. Oh, and also home of the Moores. Ever since the Moores moved away a little over two years ago, we've taken turns making visits. It's fun because regardless of whether we're doing the weekend in Athens or Statesboro, it always turns into a weekend-long house party/all-you-can-eat-buffet. This was the first trip that we've gone WITH the Gurley's down south though, and that definitely added some pizazz to the weekend (and the drive). If you can, please imagine 4 adults, one 20-month-old, and one 50-pound dog, along with all their various belongings, sharing one vehicle for a 4 hour drive. Yes, it was magnificent.
Anyway. On Saturday morning we decided to beat the heat by visiting local landmark Splash in the Boro, a fun little water park not far away. It was my first trip to a water park in a lonnnnnng time (I could tell that story later, if you'd like) and it was a very good one. Despite the long line we had to wait in to enter, the rest of the day was a lot of fun. We enjoyed getting to witness Hudson experience his first water park, even though his favorite thing to do (and since then, to say, think about, ask about, and repeat) was watch a giant bucket fill with water and then tip over and splash everyone.
I also discovered my calling in life: competitive waterslide racer. I beat all of the boys, as well as Mollyanne and other various water-park-attendees. And I beat them bad. Obviously I was made for this, so I am going to be trying to figure out how one can make a living being a waterslide racer. Let me know if you have any "ins" in the business.
So we had a great time at the 'Splash,' as the native Statesboro-ians call it.
Speaking of finding life callings: Hudson found his. Apparently he was born to be a dog. Or a cage fighter. Or something like that.
Despite staying in a house filled with toys, Hudson's favorite pastime this weekend was playing in Lola's cage. Over and over again. Pretty cute.
On Sunday we managed to squeeze in a photo shoot or two before and after church. Please note that I think there was something wrong with the sunlight or Amanda's camera or something-- because I am for real not this pale. Don't judge me. I promise I'm tanner than this!
We spent the rest of our time cooking and eating WAY too much delicious food. This included homemade ice cream TWICE (once strawberry, once chocolate), a variety of unbelievable dips, grilled pizza, two different cakes, and plenty of bacon. We also stayed up late playing games (including our traditional Mexican Train Dominoes) and laughing at Amanda's inappropriate jokes.
We got back home earlier this afternoon, right as a humongous thunderstorm started dumping rain and lightning all over us. It was lovely trying to unload the car in that. Then when Matt and I got home and checked the mail, we received a water bill for $368.82. Considering we've never before (in two years of living here) had a bill for more than $29, I was slightly shocked at that amount. Naturally, it's the fourth of July and people are off celebrating their independence or something, so I can't call the water office to raise cain, but I've penciled that in for first thing in the morning.
So! I hope your holiday weekend was long and relaxing and a fraction as fun as mine was. It seems weird that today is the actual holiday...since today for us has been more of the 'wind down and recover from the weekend' kinda day, and we'll probably be heading to bed early and praying that no neighbors think about setting off fireworks.
Happy Fourth!!
Anyway. On Saturday morning we decided to beat the heat by visiting local landmark Splash in the Boro, a fun little water park not far away. It was my first trip to a water park in a lonnnnnng time (I could tell that story later, if you'd like) and it was a very good one. Despite the long line we had to wait in to enter, the rest of the day was a lot of fun. We enjoyed getting to witness Hudson experience his first water park, even though his favorite thing to do (and since then, to say, think about, ask about, and repeat) was watch a giant bucket fill with water and then tip over and splash everyone.
Speaking of finding life callings: Hudson found his. Apparently he was born to be a dog. Or a cage fighter. Or something like that.
On Sunday we managed to squeeze in a photo shoot or two before and after church. Please note that I think there was something wrong with the sunlight or Amanda's camera or something-- because I am for real not this pale. Don't judge me. I promise I'm tanner than this!
(Amanda, Mollyanne, me)
(L-R: Jonathon, Mollyanne, Hudson, Matt, me, Amanda, Marshall, Hartley)
We got back home earlier this afternoon, right as a humongous thunderstorm started dumping rain and lightning all over us. It was lovely trying to unload the car in that. Then when Matt and I got home and checked the mail, we received a water bill for $368.82. Considering we've never before (in two years of living here) had a bill for more than $29, I was slightly shocked at that amount. Naturally, it's the fourth of July and people are off celebrating their independence or something, so I can't call the water office to raise cain, but I've penciled that in for first thing in the morning.
So! I hope your holiday weekend was long and relaxing and a fraction as fun as mine was. It seems weird that today is the actual holiday...since today for us has been more of the 'wind down and recover from the weekend' kinda day, and we'll probably be heading to bed early and praying that no neighbors think about setting off fireworks.
Happy Fourth!!
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