Dinosaurs, Dairy Queens, and Desert Islands: Meet Amanda!

It's been a pretty emotional week over here-- and can I get a high-five for posting SIX DAYS IN A ROW? Pretty sure that's never been done before (by me, anyway). Anyway, it's been loads of fun (love all your comments!!!)...but it's been all about ME. Which is generally fine by me, since it IS my blog and all. But too much me-me-me...it's just not good for your soul. So today, it's not about me at all-- today, it's time for you to get to know someone you may already know...but not as well as you're about to...

Today, I want to introduce to you the one and only Amanda Joiner!

And just like she doesn't play around with a hot chicken chowder, she doesn't play around when it comes to being interviewed.

Why are you interviewing her? you may be wondering. I'll tell you why. Because sometimes I think of hilarious questions, and when I meet someone who can provide up-to-par answers, I just feel led to INTERVIEW THEM. And put it on my blog. So that we can all have a good chuckle together. And you can make new friends!

So a quick glance around Amanda's blog will probably give you the basics on her current life, but this interview is intended to reveal the deeper things. The things you may not know. The things SHE may not have even known until I probed. The things that even-- dare I say it??-- her identical twin sister Allison might not know. I know, folks. We're gettin REAL up in here. So...on with the interview!

       So Amanda, I think I've heard somewhere that you're an identical twin. That leads me to an obvious question: did you and Allison ever think about or plan to find a pair of identical twin boys to marry? And if yall DID find and marry twin boys, do you think you would have had a double wedding?

The rumors are true- I am an identical twin. Once upon a time, we read an article in a magazine about a set of identical twins that married each other. We thought this was really cool… until we got to the part about their respective children being genetically brother and sister (rather than just cousins). I think the dream died that day.

Even though we did not end up marrying twins, we did end up with college roommates, and once my mom realized that engagements were likely, she started pushing for a double wedding (double the fun, half the cost!). Apparently she was forgetting how much we both enjoy being the center of attention. Fortunately, Allison and Wade got engaged AND married before Brian had the funds was prepared to pop the question, so we dodged that bullet.

  Hmmm...don't be so quick to knock the idea of you and Allison's children being genetic siblings. I personally think that would be a pretty fantastic perk! And a great conversation starter. But anyway, since you and Allison DIDN'T manage to find and marry twins, it looks like you're stuck with Brian and Wade. That's cool. At least the 4 of yall are still really tight. 

So imagine you're forming a circus. There's a ringleader, a tightrope walker, a clown, and a lion tamer. Tell me which of you guys fills each of those roles, and provide justification for your choices.
 

You had me at, “imagine you’re forming a circus.” Ok here’s the breakdown:

Ringleader: Me, because I’m the bossiest one of the bunch. Don’t get me wrong- Allison gives me a run for my money, but ultimately she defers to my authority, so I would win that contest.

Tightrope walker: Wade, because he has the most self-control… and because he is tall and thin

Clown: Brian, because his silliness knows no limits when he’s trying to make people laugh

Lion tamer: Allison, because I have seen her when she’s angry, and trust me when I say that even a lion would bow down in fear if she unleashed her wrath :)

I guess Wade's lucky to have so much self-control if Allison is really as scary as you say she is. Well it sounds like you've gotten this circus thing all figured out, in case your day job doesn't work out. But let's get back to a less creepy and clown-filled topic: Weddings! So you got married back in 2007...what was your approach to wedding planning? Were you totally laid back, or more of a Bridezilla-type?

I, like all brides, had my Bridezilla moments (feel free to contact Allison for examples), but for the most part, I think I was fairly low-key. I remember being very stressed for a few weeks after we got engaged and then again during the last month leading up to the wedding, with the low point being the day that I broke out into a stress-induced case of the hives from head to toe approximately 3 weeks before the big day. That was special.

As far as planning went, I made it a point early on to limit my options for everything from venues to wedding dresses, because I wanted to make decision-making easier. All I can say is that I’m glad Pinterest was not around when we were engaged, because I think I would have lost my mind!

Um, no kidding. The wedding stuff on Pinterest blows my mind. So after the wedding, it's only natural to start adding to the family via pets. You and Brian have two dogs now, but here's the thing: if practicality were NO issue and real life was not a constraining factor, what animal would you like as a pet? For instance, I would choose a manatee. Obviously. What about you? Also, make-believe creatures are perfectly acceptable (dragons, unicorns, centaurs, etc.).

This is easy- I would totally have a real baby dinosaur! Of course, that’s assuming that an actual baby dinosaur is as (a) entertaining and (b) easy to manage as our current imaginary one. We would obviously have to train it not to eat our dogs… or any of the neighborhood children. 

OK, not gonna lie: all of your imaginary children kinda freak me out. But that's okay-- different strokes and all that. 

OK, the interview is about to take a sharp turn to the dark side. Just be aware. This is going to be really hard for you to imagine, but what if Dairy Queen were to go bankrupt and cease to exist? Where would you go to fill the dessert hole in your heart?

 

First of all, I’m not sure I would really want to live in a world without Dairy Queen. But if I had no choice but to go on living, then my go-to dessert place would definitely be Shake’s. There used to be one in College Station, and basically it is where I always went to eat my feelings during college. I actually like it more than Dairy Queen (don’t tell anyone!), but the closest one is 2.5 hours away in Austin. Tear. 

Ooh...sounds pretty good. I guess it's convenient that you go to Austin like every other weekend or something. Sorry about making you envision such a sad world and all. But things are about to get happier!

Quick! Someone just gave you $100 cash and you have only 2 hours to spend it all-- anything not spent will have to be burned in a furnace after the 2 hours are up. Completely wasted. And you can't give any of the money away. It's only for you. Where do you go? What do you buy or do?

The practical side of me would spend it on an acupuncture session, and then spend the remaining $15 on something both essential and awesome, like Mexican food. The less practical side of me would probably say a massage and a pedicure. And if there was any money left over in that 2-hour window, then I would go get a DQ blizzard, obviously :)

I like that description of Mexican food: essential and awesome. I couldn't agree more. I'd say your money was well-spent. 

On an unrelated note, would you rather be a Broadway singer/dancer/actress or an FBI agent? Why?

I guess an FBI agent because I am way better at stalking than I am at signing/dancing/acting. Thank you, internet, for giving me ample opportunity to hone that special skill!

That's true, I'll never forget the day you managed to stalk me down on Facebook and we took our friendship from blog-only to blogs, FB, emails, cards in the mail, G-chat, texts, phone calls and visits in person. Well, not all in one day...but that is basically how it progressed. All owed to your stalking skills!
 

So I've been thinking about this lately: what's your approach to buying embarrassing things at the grocery store? Do you profile the clerks? Try to hide the embarrassing item underneath less-embarrassing items? Just throw it out there in all its glory? Provide stories, if you have any.
 

My first approach is always to go to a self check-out lane, but if that isn’t an option (I’m looking at you, HEB), then I definitely go for the lane with the female clerk- and the younger the better, because the older women are nosy and have no problem asking personal questions. And yes, I try to hide the item(s) in between less embarrassing items in hopes that they won’t notice the box of ovulation predictor kits amidst the plastic hangers, birthday card, and bag of pretzel M&M’s. Come to think of it, I actually feel like I have had to deal with this semi-frequently thanks to infertility… like this special encounter at Walmart. Or there was this fun run-in at the grocery store with my sister’s boyfriend during high school. 

Self check-out, eh? I was a big fan of that when they first came out...not so much anymore. But I do agree about the young female clerks. Definitely preferable for embarrassing items...not so much for coupons, though. Go for the young guys for that one.

So what is your personal favorite state? Least favorite state? Why?
 

Ok I am going to assume that Texas isn’t an option, because clearly that is the favorite state of anyone with a brain (was that too harsh?). My second favorite state is New Mexico, because we grew up going there for family camp (yep, for real) every summer. I have a lot of fun memories there with my family, AND thanks to my mom’s incredible Santa Fe shopping skillz, I also have a lot of fun jewelry from there as well :) Oh, and I like the mountains and cool weather.

My least favorite state is New Jersey because I firmly believe nothing good has ever come out of that state. 

Now I never said Texas wasn't an option. But if you wanna go on and on singing the praises of New Mexico, I'm not going to stop you...even though whenever House Hunters is in New Mexico (the closest I've ever personally gotten to New Mexico), it's not usually my fave...but whatever. And I personally do take a little offense to the New Jersey comment...Real Housewives of New Jersey is absolutely a quality product of that otherwise-lame state. 
 

So enough about states...more about desert islands!

You're somehow magically stranded on a desert island with ONE celebrity, ONE person-you-know-in-real-life-that-isn't-Brian-or-Allison, ONE book, and ONE frosty beverage that magically keeps refilling itself (and there's a spring nearby with abundant fresh water). Name your celebrity/person/book/drink. And you'll be off the island in a week.

This question was easier for me to answer than I expected:

Celebrity: Tina Fey. Or if she wasn’t available, then Amy Poehler. And I think the purpose is obvious – entertainment value.

Person I know in real life: One of my BFF’s from high school, Mary Margaret. We have been friends for almost 15 years, and even though our current life circumstances are not all that similar (she lives and works on an organic farm in Maine with her husband and does not consider facebook to be a staple of her every day life), some of my favorite conversations I have are with her. Also, because she lives so far away, I don’t get to see her often, so it would be fun to have a week to catch up uninterrupted… minus Tina’s/Amy’s comedic relief, that is.

Book: Pastor’s wife alert! I think I would pick a devotional by Beth Moore. Her books are fun to read AND thought-provoking. Bonus: she was a Chi Omega (my sorority). :)

Frosty beverage: I’m going to go with Sprite, because (a) that’s what I drink when I want to spice up my typical H2O routine, and (b) it would help settle my stomach if I had to eat strange island food, like insects. My second choice (if you were aiming for the alcoholic variety) would be a frozen margarita (no salt, please).

I was actually going for an alcoholic beverage, so I'm glad you threw that in. Who would want to be stuck on an island with only a SPRITE? Lame. Good call on Tina Fey, though. Maybe you could make it into her next book-- or an episode of 30 Rock!

  

Alright, it's about time to wrap this thing up with a more serious question: what's your favorite thing about blogging? Since you've been doing it regularly since August 30, 2007, I can only assume you like it...

Honestly, I just really enjoy writing! Yes, it is therapeutic to put my thoughts into words, and yes, it has been fun to make friends in the blogging community. But when it comes down to it, I have a lot to say and enjoy the process of coming up with a (hopefully) entertaining way to say it.

OK, the correct answer to the previous question was actually "meeting you, Erika!"...but I guess I'll let it slide this once. Writing is cool too, I guess.

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Well folks, that wraps up our interview for today. Hopefully you feel like you got to know Amanda a little better and were at least a little entertained. I know I was, doing the interview, so I guess that's really all that matters. 

It's Friday, right?? Hallelujah. Go forth and conquer.

And if you think of any more deep, thought-provoking interview questions, feel free to send them my way. Or if you'd like to be my next interviewee-- let me know! I'm always looking for someone to tolerate my ridiculous questions!

Happy Friday, yall!!