another tuesday list

Whew. Howdy, yall. Long time no chat. It's been one of those weeks...and it's only Tuesday morning, how is this possible? Anyway. The only way to organize all of the extremely deep and important thoughts in my head is with a trusty ol' bullet-point list, so let's get on with it.

1. These words actually came out of my mouth last night: "We're not going to be able to go to the gym tomorrow...we are way too behind on TV." I know. People of the world with actual problems, please forgive me for mine. But seriously. I watched the whole entire Oscar ceremony Sunday night (more on that later) which meant I missed Walking Dead. Then last night we had a last-minute change of plans to hang out at the Gurleys' house (more on that later, too) where there is no TV...so now I've missed 2 hours of Bachelor. That's THREE HOURS of TV-catching-up to do, and also I'm having to avoid Twitter until I can do it, so...gotta get on that STAT. Sheesh. My life is so hard.

2. Speaking of the Oscars, I was pretty entertained. I'd seen 3 of the Best Picture nominees (that also earned quite a few other nominations/wins as well): Les Mis (DUHHHH), Life of Pi, and Beasts of the Southern Wild. So I enjoyed seeing all the clips/stars/nominations for those movies, and I liked seeing Les Mis and Life of Pi win so many awards. I was hoping to see lots of fashion faux pas (what's the plural of 'pas'? Faux paseseses, there we go.) to laugh at, but it seems like most people kept their fashion in line this year.

I particularly loved Jessica Chastain's dress and look. I thought she looked SO glamorous and classy.

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Her gorgeous skin, classy hair, perfect red lipstick...that DRESS...I mean, wow. Stunning. I had to compare everyone else to her for the rest of the night. I'm trying not to compare myself to her right now, actually.

3. I've been on another reading kick the last few days and here's the formula for Books I Want to Read Right Now: Woman who is being hunted/chased by bad guys and is probably in witness protection for some crime she witnessed years ago, living on the run, living a series of lies to protect her identity. Man who is probably a cop or FBI agent that takes an interest in her case (and her, of course, ultimately) and has to protect her from the encroaching danger. Love develops. The good guys get closer to catching the bad guys, but CAN HE KEEP HER SAFE?!? WILL SHE LEARN TO TRUST HIM??! Yall, this is pathetic. But it's SO GOOD. I've read at least 5 books that follow this exact formula in the last week or so and right now I'm reading one that doesn't follow The Formula and I'm totally disinterested in it. I mean, if there's no Russian mafia on your tail, I don't really care who you're falling in love with because falling in love is easy when no one's trying to kill you.

4. I planted my seeds on Sunday (in starter pots, to grow indoors til it's outside planting time) and diligently photographed every step and have loads of plans to make a very entertaining tutorial...but all of the pictures are still on the camera. And seeing as tonight is already booked up (too much TV, remember?), who knows when I'll get around to that. Hopefully before it's too late for all of you to start YOUR seeds.

5. Yesterday I almost had a heart attack. Seriously. Because my friend Mollyanne, who is 29 weeks pregnant, fell down the stairs and had to spend the day in the hospital being monitored...well, I was absorbing that okay, assuming she was in the ER...and then she told me she was in Labor and Delivery. OMG NO, YOU CANNOT BE IN L&D. I almost stroked out. Then she clarified that that's just where they stick you to monitor you and that she wasn't actually in labor. You have no idea the feeling of thankfulness that washes over you when you find out your friend ISN'T going into extremely premature labor. Wow. So we spent the evening over at their house hanging out with her 3-year-old so that her husband could be with her in the hospital, hence the No Bachelor Watching. The irony is that on Sunday we'd been discussing HER conundrum- they just cut their cable (and don't have an antennae or whatever yet) last week and so SHE was trying to figure out how/where to watch The Bachelor. Well, as it turned out, SHE got to watch it in the hospital, and I had to suffer the consequences of their hasty cable-cutting. Ha. (It's okay, I DVRd it, and I was still so overwhelmed with thankfulness that she wasn't hurt/having a baby that I really wasn't/am not upset at all. It's just funny.) Plus it gave me more time to read my formulaic books, so we're all good.

Possibly the funniest part of this whole situation is also Bachelor-related. Both of our husbands are also avid Bachelor-watchers (sorry for outing you, boys). So when I was texting with Jonathon, her husband, about helping them out, here are some of the messages we swapped: "If she's pulling a Tierra, she's doing a pretty convincing job." "Sooner or later the nurses will find out that she's not here for the right reasons." "Don't let them take her sparkle. NEVER LET THEM take her sparkle!"

6. Guess what. For work I have to become a NOTARY PUBLIC. I know. I know. I'm going to be like...a super huge deal. It's probably hard to imagine how important that public office actually is or what super important things I'll have to do or what power I'll be wielding...I know. I'm a little overwhelmed myself. I mean, I have to fill out like 3 pieces of paper AND pay $37 AND get "sworn in" by the Clerk of the Superior Court, so...basically I'm a Really Big Deal. And then I'll get a stamp and a seal. And that's really all I have to say about that.

I think I'm done blowing your mind for today. Have a good one!