So with the new job has come changing around our benefits. I know- exciting stuff. I'm not going to bore you with the details, but basically I'm joining Matt on his insurance now. This is not interesting in the least, until yesterday when we got this letter in the mail. Maybe I'm easily entertained, but I laughed for like ten minutes and referred to myself as only "Spouse B-----" for quite some time. I mean, who needs a first name when you could just be "Spouse B-----"? Exactly.
And my favorite part is that it's not like they don't know my name. First of all-- I USED to be on his plan, a few years ago. Evidently that doesn't count, because when I tried to enroll this time they acted like this was some unheard of situation and needed all of our documentation proving that I was a legit "spouse," which meant we had to dig out our marriage certificate and send it to them, and I'm like...do you people not keep anything? We gave you all this a few years ago. Whatever. Just don't make me pay a fortune every time I go to the doctor and we'll be good.
OH YEAH! Now that I'm thinking about it...back when Matt first started working for this company (5.5 yrs ago) and I was on his benefits, we spent about 4 months trying to have me listed as a FEMALE. Trust me. It was awesome. They somehow had me as a male in all of their documentation. You wouldn't believe how many phone calls and birth certificates had to be sent out to prove that I was, in fact, a girl. I offered to walk in to HR and just prove it, get it over with once and for all, but apparently they weren't interested? Who knows. Silly companies. Apparently this company has a vendetta against me or something.
In other news, last night we made Spicy Quinoa-Stuffed Avocados with Cilantro 'Sour Cream' for dinner.
It was very interesting. I liked using the avocados as little 'boats' to put the stuff in, but let's be honest. They only looked like this for as long as it took me to take a picture with my phone. To actually eat it, you had to chop them all up. I mean, unless you didn't plan on eating the avocado, I guess. But who would waste two delicious avocados? A crazy person. Wanna know what the 'sour cream' was made out of? OK, this one made me feel a little bit fruity, when I start making my own vegan sour cream substitutes...it's made out of CASHEWS. And apple cider vinegar, and water, and cilantro, and a squirt of honey. I know, right. I felt like a tree hugger on that one. (Actually Matt made it, so he did) It's pretty good, though. It doesn't really taste like sour cream (duh, how could it?), but it was a good addition. Anyway. Yeah. Life with the Bird Food Diet is never boring...
Time for work. Later haters.
PS. Speaking of hate...TIERRA IS GONE!!! Buh-bye, CRAZY! #Bachelor
I have a hard time coming up with blog titles too. Spouse B, what a catchy name. That dinner looks so good but it would never fly in my house with my picky husband.
ReplyDeleteHaha this post cracked me up! Spouse B, so considerate of them! That dinner does look pretty yummy :)
ReplyDeleteHaha… insurance companies are CRAZY! When I first started working in Augusta, my HR entered my birthdate as 10/21/11. When I went to the dentist that spring, my insurance denied my cleaning as I was listed as a 16 week in-utero baby!!!! Good grief people! It took FOREVER to get that sorted out with HR and then the insurance company! Nightmare!
ReplyDeleteAny chance you have rockstar coverage now and the insurance is like, hey here's $10,000 for infertility? Of course not, why do I ask? We live in GA and you would never have left the policy if it did. Blahhhh!
I'm thinking you should change our blog URL to "mattyspouse" at blogspot dot com...
ReplyDeleteThat food looks delicious, I LOVE avocados!! Did I miss something diet related, are you a vegan?
ReplyDeleteGuess you could be "Spouse #2"...that sounds worse! My husband began introducing me as his 1st wife at our wedding. Um...he thinks he's funny...NOT! :-)
ReplyDeleteHa ha! Love Allison's comment!
ReplyDeleteMaybe the insurance company left the "A" off at the end of your name and thought you were "Erik"...
Seriously, so glad i found you b/c you CRACK ME UP! I missed the job chnage but i'm catching up on blog reading now. I just got a new job, as you know, & am switching to my hubby's insurance too! :) So funny they thought you were male for years! HAHA!
ReplyDeleteThose avocado boats look AMAZING! Omg! :)
Our insurance has jacked our family all up.
ReplyDeleteThe biggest one that we struggle with is that Brandon's legal first name is Julian.
And we have a Julianne. People are FOREVER putting her claims under his, and his under hers. 6 years old and female vs 31 years old and male... Well no wonder they didn't want to pay for a 31 year old's "well CHILD" check up!
You've read those posts where I come back and change the title, or I let you choose your own title, or... Yeah, blog post titles are hard.
ReplyDeleteAnd Spouse B -- I think that's a great new nickname for you! Ha ha ha! But then is there a "Spouse A"? (And I realize that you just didn't want to share your last name but I think it's even funnier as "Spouse B"!)
HA so when I first read this, I definitely thought the B**** stood for something totally else! So for the rest of the time I was reading it, I kept thinking of "Spouse + the other B-word" and laughing to myself- too funny!
ReplyDeletethat actually looks pretty good, you know, for bird food! ;-) thank god she is gone!!!
ReplyDeleteGood post Spouse B. :)
ReplyDeleteI cannot find our marriage licesne anywhere. I still need to change my name in a couple of places, and I can't without that paper. I don't want to pay another $50 for a copy.
My oldest sis went vegan a few months ago. I have learned how many ways cashews can be used - she just went to a class that makes artisan vegan cheese using cashews and tofu. I will say that cashew cream is pretty delicious and luxurious. You can sweeten it up and make pudding.
ReplyDelete