the Erika Method for choosing sports

Thanks for your excitement and support yesterday, yall. That means so much to me and each of your words of encouragement and hope made me feel all warm and fuzzy, so thank you!!

And now back to your regularly scheduled nonsense.

As I was mentally preparing my outfit for tennis lessons on Tuesday night, it suddenly occurred to me that since I have demonstrated such commitment to and excitement about my new sport (played twice), I should reward myself with a cute tennis skirt...because if you're going to play a sport, it's important to dress the part, right?

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 I mean, surely there's a reason women wear skirts to play tennis in other than the fact that they're cute, right? So I didn't want to miss out on whatever that reason is, so clearly I needed to go shopping.

So I did, and although I technically bought a running skirt (who knew?! Now running can be cute, too!), I definitely felt like a more legit tennis player during lessons that night. Some people say that like 80% of the game is mental (okay, I made up the statistic AND have no idea whether that saying applies to tennis, actually, but I'm pretty sure I heard something like that applied to SOME sport, so whatever)...I would like to say that 80% of the game is dressing the right way.

And then I realized that apparently I feel this way about every sport or athletic endeavor I attempt. I think I have an issue with workout clothes.

I LOVE THEM SO MUCH.

My workout wardrobe is seriously way better than my 'real' wardrobe. I need to get a job in a gym so that I can have more opportunities to be cute (without feeling obligated to sweat or get stinky). But I've noticed that over the past year or two, almost every new sport or fitness thing I attempt tends to 'require' cute new clothes. Let's review:

1) Zumba. Oh yes. Zumba classes found me rushing out to buy workout leggings (in multiple lengths) and loads of neon tops and sports bras. Oh and two different pairs of neon shoes. Trust me, your ability to dance and burn calories increases proportionate to the number of neon things you are wearing.

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2) Running. Thankfully, for running I can use most of my Zumba clothes (leggings and tanks being my preferred outfit), but you do need cute running shoes (different from Zumba shoes) and about 10 pairs of Nike Tempo shorts (or knock-offs) to maintain cred on the treadmill. If all of your cute/preferred tops are dirty, it is moderately acceptable to wear an old nasty t-shirt while running. But only if you're outdoors in the country. Not acceptable at the gym.

3) Tennis. I've already discussed this, but it seems that cute and sporty skirts are the way to go here. So far I'm pairing them with my favorite neon tops and shoes, but if I decide I need something preppier, I'm not opposed to going shopping again. Surprisingly. 

I've also taken up some sports with decidedly less cute wardrobe requirements.

1) Biking. I had to buy some of those padded-butt bike shorts. Wow. Trust me, this booty doesn't need padding (except for when riding...it feels like it does), so I apologize to anyone who has to see me in those. I normally just wear them under some Nike Tempos so that the padding part isn't so ugly. Also, bike shorts are banded at the bottom (so that they don't slide up while you ride) and therefore squeeze in on the middle of your thigh, giving you this amazing little Thigh Fat Roll. Trust me. It's awesome. To be honest, as much as I'm enjoying bike riding, I don't know if it's the best way to make yourself look cute. My thighs have GOTTEN BIGGER (I guess it's muscle, but who cares? The net result is that jeans and shorts look LESS CUTE) as I've progressed, and I'm just not a fan of that. So I'm struggling to figure out the redeeming characteristics of biking as exercise. Not the wardrobe. Not the way it makes your thighs look. ......??? anyone?? Oh, also DOGS CHASE YOU, which is not particularly fun. That never happens during Zumba.

2) Swimming.

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I have almost this exact suit. Trust me, it does not look like this on me. Nor does swimming make me look like this. Possibly because I only do it for about 10 minutes every other week? Who knows. I can't stay committed to a sport that requires me to look so extremely un-cute while participating.

Alright, so those are the current sports I participate in (to some extent). Clearly, the cuter the clothes, the more I like the sport. Therefore I would like to take a minute to examine some sports I don't participate in and evaluate the likelihood that I might take them up in the future (when the Clothing Budget gets filled again, perhaps).

1. Golf.

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Skirts! Looks basically like tennis, only a little preppier? Sign me up. Plus you'd get a killer tan. I could definitely do golf.

2. Basketball

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Baggy, shapeless, long shorts and wide-strapped tank tops? NO THANK YOU. I will not be taking up basketball anytime in the near future, thanks.

3. Horseback Riding

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Oh Lord, yes. Adorable skinny pants, tall boots, structure jackets? Why did I not take up this sport years ago? And let us be specific: that kind of equestrian wear is appropriate. NOT this...

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Alright. That was loads of fun, but now I need to get to work. In my boring, non-exciting work clothes. Such is life!