pins & needles

Last night, after we finished folding the last of the teeny preemie clothes and I'd paid every single bill and spent a little while giving our budget the stink eye, we settled back to watch some football. Well, that's a lie. Matt watched football. I gawked over some ridiculous high chairs on Amazon (don't worry, they hold up to THREE HUNDRED POUNDS!! You know, in case your baby is AN ELEPHANT).

It was about 8:45 p.m. My phone rang. It was a number I didn't know. I answered.

It was our birth mom's mother. She wanted to let us know that they had just arrived at the hospital. We just want to have her checked. We're not sure if they'll send us home or let us stay, but the contractions have stayed steady at every five minutes, so we just wanted them to take a look at her. Don't start driving yet-- we'll call you back once we know something!

CUE FREAKOUT.

We frantically throw our last-minute stuff (toiletries, snacks, extra outfits in case there's a major climate change in the next few days (ALWAYS BE PREPARED, that's my motto!)) into our suitcase and the car. We call our parents. We wait.

Around 9:30, she calls back. She's dilated to 2cm, but they aren't sure if they're going to admit her or not. They're going to check her again in an hour. Just sit tight, we'll let you know!

"Um, I just think we're going to start driving, okay? Because...we're kind of far away...and last time her entire labor was only 7 hours and this is her second and it could be even faster and I AM GOING INSANE SITTING HERE WAITING, I WOULD RATHER BE DRIVING!!!"

They very kindly convinced me that I should be less crazy and just WAIT.

Wait? Wait? Like I haven't been waiting my whole life for this already? ANOTHER HOUR OF WAITING MIGHT KILL ME.

More frantic texting with parents, dog sitters, and I packed a few more alternate outfits. Just in case. It's hot in the South, you know? But there could also be a cold front. Or it might rain? Weather can be unpredictable. And hospitals are cold! And what else am I supposed to be doing while I wait to find out if we're going to meet our daughter tonight or not?!?!

We vacuumed. Twice. We repeatedly checked Google Maps to make sure we knew where we were going. We put our stuff in the car. Our next-door-neighbor came over and we frantically analyzed our birth mom's 'labor signs,' our car seat installation, and the relationships between our vagabond outdoor cats and their neighborhood friends.

At 11:30 our birth mom finally calls back. They sent me home. It won't be tonight. It'll probably be this weekend. Get some sleep, I'll call you tomorrow.

"Ooooh...dangit. Yeah. You get some sleep too. Or not. Get some contractions, actually. Get some dilation. Go take a five mile walk."

I didn't actually say all that. I'm not THAT much of a jerk. ;) 

I texted back our parents, dog sitter, and lawyer. Not tonight. Go sleep.

Guess how much I slept.

I'm at work now, but for how long?! We re-packed our bags this morning. Everything's in the car. I guess we've moved to the pattern where we will gladly pack/unpack our stuff every morning and evening if it means that the next time the call comes, we can drop everything and leave RIGHT THEN. 

Let's take a vote. (No time for a legit survey, sorry!) Would you think Matt and I are crazy if we just go ahead and drive to the town where the baby will be delivered tonight? Even if she's not in labor? We could just get a hotel and like...get to know the town...?? AND BE ONLY FIVE MINUTES AWAY FROM THE HOSPITAL. It's a serious consideration right now.

Sooo freeeaking antsy right now.

Just wanted to keep you updated.

Oh- yesterday several of you asked whether the situation with the birth father has had any resolution. To my knowledge, it has not. As I mentioned before, there is nothing he can do one way or the other until after the baby is born. Last I heard (from our lawyers) they had been unable to contact him for several days (and this was a few weeks ago), so I have no idea what his thinking is right now. There's nothing we can do about it anyway. We are moving forward with excitement and the full support of our birth mom and her mother, whom I spoke with several times last night and think I am really going to love once I meet her in person. I am so excited to be gaining all of this new family so that we can all love this baby together. Now all she has to do is be born... COME ON BABY GIRL!!!

PS. You know how I love making fun of people moaning about Daylight Savings Time #worstthingever ?? GO READ THIS BLOG. It is freaking hilarious. The Real Reason We Observe Daylight Savings Time: To Kill Parents.