Thursday, September 26, 2013

chosen

Sooo...I need to confess something.

I've sorta been keeping a secret from you. I've been debating whether to share. When to share. How to share. Whether sharing will somehow jinx me, even though Amanda reminds me that our God is not a God of jinxes-- and I'm repeating that to myself twenty times a day.

But this verse keeps popping back into my head, uninvited, out of nowhere:

"Be happy with those who are happy, and weep with those who weep." (Romans 12:15)

And I feel like we've done our share of weeping around here. Way more than our share. For the last few years, this (both my blog and the community of women I've met through it) has been such a safe place- a place of support, of kindness, of love. A place where so many of you-- STRANGERS, even!!-- have promised your prayers and offered kind words and cried with me. We've done our time weeping. So it only seems fair to share the happiness, too. Even if I'm scared. Even if I fear that more weeping could come in the future. Why shouldn't we take a few minutes and be happy when...well, when there is cause for happiness?

And there is cause for great happiness, my friends.

We have been chosen.

Matched.

We're going to be bringing home a baby.

There is a pregnant mother right now and she chose us. She likes us. She told me with her own mouth-- when I saw you, I knew. You have been waiting far too long and now it's over. Your baby will be here soon.

And in five years of infertility and two years of pursuing adoption, we've never heard that. We've never had our hearts fill with love and fear as we contemplate being parents in two short months. We've never gotten to tell our parents that they're going to be grandparents, and our siblings that they're going to be aunts and uncles. We've never had to tell our bosses that we're going on maternity/paternity leave, or registered for cribs, or analyzed the virtues of various formulas. But now we have.

And we are so, so, SO happy. 

And of course, terrified-- not of impending parenthood, but that it could all fall apart. And it could. We're not naive. And so the fear of that happening was almost enough to make us want to keep it under wraps. But you know what?

"Be happy with those who are happy..."

Because (big shocker) we really, really want and hope and pray and believe that this will work out. That a baby girl will be joining our family right in time for the holidays. And when she does, we want to be able to tell her how excited we were to meet her. How many people love her already. How she has been prayed for, fist-pumped over, and delighted in even before she was born. I won't deprive her of the right to be loved and anticipated before she's born. This could be our only child, who knows? I would hate to waste her pre-birth days in fear. I want her to know beyond any shadow of a doubt that she is infinitely valuable and loved. By God, and by a million people- some people she'll one day meet in the flesh, and many she never will. But her life will be beautiful and I want to celebrate it now. 

We are so, so happy. Feel free to join us.
Turns out this was our babymoon! Who knew?

Matt y Erika...and finally, at long last...a baby. December 2013.

 Bless the Lord, O my soul.

100 comments:

  1. AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! I am so so happy! I mean, literally, I am teary - which is a little weird since we've never officially met!

    YAY!!!!! I call dibs on hosting your online baby shower! :)

    SO much love and prayers for you guys! IT IS YOUR GRADUATION YEAR - CLASS OF 2013!!!

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  2. Tears!! Congrats!! Love that this community of people can rejoice and sing praise over your sweet family today & moving forward! Woohoo!!! This MADE my day!

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  3. CONGRATS! Cheering, praying, smiling! Thanks so much for sharing the amazing news with us. So excited for you and Matt!

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  4. Praise God! And CONGRATULATIONS! You will be such awesome parents and your little girl will never doubt that she is loved! December 2013 is going to be a fantastic month! (And btw, thanks for causing tears on my school PICTURE DAY. yeesh...heading to fix my eye make-up now!).

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  5. Yay! Such amazing news and further evidence of God's perfect timing, even down to the babymoon! So excited for y'all and can't wait for the news of her arrival :)

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  6. Best early 31st birthday present ever? I THINK SO.

    THRILLED for you guys and praying, praying, praying! (Also, love Amanda's point about the babymoon!!!)

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  7. Erika!!! I am soo excited for you guys! I totally am believing with you for this! Praying for you guys and hoping soo much :) God is so good and He knows everything we need. Praying for you guys!

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  8. Oh! My! Goodness!!!!! Eriks!!!!! The tears... they won't stop. I'm so so SO happy for you and Matt. This is amazing news. My heart is so full for you! I'm so happy that you shared this with all of us. I will continue to hold you guys in my prayers that all goes smoothly! Yayyyyy!!!!!

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  9. i'm freaking crying at work. omg. i just can't even. how amazing is the Lord.

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  10. Might be the most amazing blog post I've ever read...ever! Chills, smiles, tears...all at once. I can't stand how happy and excited I am for you and Matt. Life is good. You need you enjoy this moment, this announcement; register for you baby girl coming home! Sending virtual hugs! xoxo

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  11. I'm not normally one that comments but man oh day! CONGRATS!!!!
    What wonderful wonderful news!

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  12. Congratulations!!!!! I am SO happy for you!! What a blessed baby girl to have you as her mommy!! :)

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  13. If there is a limit to how many happy tears I can cry for you in one week, I have not yet found it. And I love your biblical reasoning for sharing the news now. Beautiful. Love you!!

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  14. I agree best NEWS EVER!!! What wonderful and perfect timing just in time for your birthday;) For this child we have prayed. Can't wait to meet baby girl. We will be down in GA and now expect more than ever at least a short get together so I can love on her and you guys!!!!!!

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  15. This is the best news I've heard all week! So excited for y'all and praying that every thing will work out perfectly! Can't wait to see that little bundle. Congratulations!!

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  16. And now I'm crying again! :) It's so joyful!! I keep thinking of Psalm 27:13 "And I will live to see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living." :D Your years the locusts have eaten are being redeemed at long last and all of us here on the earth and angels in heaven are rejoicing. "The Lord LONGS to be gracious to you..." And gracious He is. Love you!!

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  17. That is wonderful news! You have lots of prayers coming your way!

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  18. In tears over here. I kid you not, I was praying for this very thing for you and Matt last night. Thank you so much for letting us share your happiness with you! Praying and rejoicing with you today!!

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  19. Erika I am so excited for you guys! I add my voices to the tons giving you such happy congratulations! The Lord is so faithful and so good! :D

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  20. Praise God! This is fabulous news. And a little girl.....so much fun! She's a very lucky little lady.

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  21. Oh my goodness! So wonderful! This is amazing news! Praying for you guys, the momma, and your sweet baby girl!

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  22. An even more appropriate verse this morning would probably be: "Weep with those who are happy." I am overwhelmed with emotions and excitement for you guys; this is the best news I've heard in a really long time. Thank you for sharing this joy with us! I look forward to the day you're finally able to reveal your baby girl's name that you've held near and dear for so long!

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  23. I love you guys so much! What wisdom has come from you. I'm so proud of you Erika. And, you are right, baby girl has been prayed over and she is loved even before her birth. You are so brave. Yay! *victory dance*

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  24. Such wonderful awesome amazing news!!!

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  25. This is amazing! Congratulations!!!! I'm so thrilled for you!!! This is going to work out. :) Ah, it's your time!!!

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  26. I can't type because I can't see through the (happy) tears!! I am so thrilled for y'all and will continue all the prayers for you and this little girl. What a blessing!

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  27. Congratulations! I am so thrilled for you. God works in such amazing ways. Last night for some reason I specifically prayed that you would have a baby by the end of the year. And then I doubted myself for putting a time on it... But why not ask God for big things? He is so good! Will pray now that all goes smoothly as planned.

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  28. Sobbing. Straight sobbing. And texting you. I'm a mess. I'm so freaking excited for you girl! NO ONE deserves this baby girl more than you! I'm so, so happy for you and Matt! Joining with you in prayer and thanksgiving that the next few weeks are filled with joy and not fear as you wait for your daughter!

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  29. oh my goodness I am sitting here crying. I am SOOO happy for you. no joke, last night i was writing in my prayer journal and i prayed for a baby to come to you a Matt, wow, the Lord is amazing. :] I will keep praying that this all works out and you have this little bundle of joy for the holiday season. CONGRATULATIONS!

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  30. Wow, Wow and Wow! This is incredible news Erika! I am over the moon happy for you! xoxo

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  31. oh girl. I am crying tears of happiness for you guys. I am just so so so excited for you and your hubby. This has been a long road for you...finally it's ending!!! God is so good!

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  32. I am happy with you!!! Such great news!

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  33. Now you've done it! I'm crying! How wonderful! I can't wait to hear more!

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  34. I can't even begin to say how happy I am for ya'll!! Tearing up here! Praise God for this wonderful blessing :)

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  36. Your dad was so excited when I saw him at church on Sunday! And so are we! We are prying for everything to go smoothly. Good news is long past due! Congratulations! Yippee!! Better invite me to a baby shower in Augustaland!

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  37. Yep. Best news I've heard in a long time! You've got this lady crying tears of joy over here! Congratulations a million times over. I can't wait to follow along on this new journey!

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  38. Not kidding when I say this made me cry!!!! If I can't wait to meet this baby, I can only imagine you are bustin' at the seams with happiness. This baby is seriously one lucky kid. (P.S., Daph LOVESLOVESLOVES babies, so she would be so thrilled if you kidnapped her right now. Also, my house has 5 bedrooms!! A good house to fill with babies! So obviously you should move here.)

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  39. SHUT THE FRONT DOOR!!!!!! This is definitely my most favorite post you've EVER written. I cannot WAIT to hear more about the baby, see pictures and watch your journey as you ease into motherhood. CONGRATS E! So excited for you. :)

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  40. Congratulations! What wonderful news. I can't wait to read your blog as you move into this new role of mother.

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  41. Congratulations! God is so good! And you will make a fabulous mom to one lucky little girl!

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  42. WOW! Beautiful, amazing, perfect! What a lucky little girl to have you and Matt as parents! May this be the beginning of a season of redemption and restoration for you guys! Rejoicing with you from Ohio!

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  43. What wonderful, exciting news! Congratulations!!!

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  44. What incredibly joyous news, Matt y Erika!! I just teared up at my desk. Above everything else, I can't imagine how elated you both must be. Praise be to God. Sending my love to you both, the birth mother and your baby to be!

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  45. OH MY GOSH!!!!! This is SO EXCITING!!! Tears in my eyes for you both. Praying for peace, health, love, and connection. I am so happy for you!!!!!!!! Our God is so good!

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  46. OH! OH! OH! OH! OH!

    This is so, so, so... so.


    Oh Erika, I am so happy for you and Matt!

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  47. BAWLING AT MY DESK RIGHT NOW and I just told my husband!!! I am so, so, so, so, so OVER THE MOON HAPPY FOR YOU! And as a parent who has recently adopted a baby, I can tell you that I regularly forget I did not give birth to my child. The love is so big and overwhelming and he is the joy of my life. You have big, life changing, make you laugh you are so happy love waiting for you. The love is the same, so much so that it surprised me. You are going to be very surprised by joy, more joy than you have now and that moment where you meet your child for the first time, WOW. It's our "Birth story".

    LETS TALK ON THE PHONE SOON!

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  48. You have made my day! My week! Perhaps my month! I am so beyond thrilled for you and Matt. This is incredible news and I'm now going to dance in my cubicle.
    You must be BURSTING. 2 months??? 2MONTHS!!! I CAN'T WAIT!

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  49. OOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH MMMMMMMMMYYYYYYYYYYYYYY GGGGGGGGOOOSSSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can't even read this whole post through my really happy tears :)

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  50. First time commenter here...like many others, I am tearing up at my desk! So happy to read this news, how exciting!!

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  51. OH MY. You guys are going to be such amazing parents!! I cannot wait to see a million pictures! Congratulations!

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  52. I am also a first time commenter. I am so happy for your both. You will be amazing parents and she is so lucky to have you. (Now I am off to check my eye makeup because of the happy tears!) Congrats!

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  53. Tears in my eyes! I'm so excited for you and Matt! You will be wonderful parents. I will be praying for your sweet baby girl as she continues to grow and get ready for her big debut and I will be praying that God will see to all the details and that you will bring home your baby girl on December. Yay!!

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  54. I seriously have tears in my eyes from reading this post! I'm so excited for you and if we actually had ever met I would give you a great big hug! I'll be praying for you guys!

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  55. I don't comment often (my bad) but you have often been in my prayers and I couldn't be happier reading your post today. Absolutely thrilled for the three of you!

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  56. I am a big mess of joyful tears right now. Ohhhh!! Praise God from whom all blessings flow!

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  57. AHHHHH! I literally got chills reading this. I am BEYOND excited for you guys!!!! That baby girl is going to be SO loved and will have the best parents! I will continue to keep you in my prayers and hope that it WILL work out! When I saw your tweet last night I was so hoping it was something related to this!

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  58. YAYYYYYYY!!!!!! When I read your twitter yesterday, I just KNEW this was going to be your news!!

    Erika I am beyond happy for you. It just goes to show how many people care about you and support you because look at how many comments you've gotten already!

    I am so excited to read all about your adoption journey as it unfolds!! xo

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  59. Today your blog title, "Something Beautiful" seems particular poignant. I've been reading here like a creepy stalker for a couple of years, and have hardly ever commented. But I have prayed for you, cried for you, and am now so thankful with you that those who sew in tears do reap in joy! Makes me think of the hymn you didn't always realize your blog was named after...Something beautiful, something good, all my confusion, He understood. All I had to offer Him was brokenness and strife, but He made something beautiful of my life. Not that your life isn't or wasn't beautiful post baby girl. It just gets to be even more beautiful! Congrats to you both.

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  60. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!! Couldn't be more thrilled!!! Congratulations!!! Praying everything works out.

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  61. Oh. my. Gooooooooooshh!!! I saw the title of the post and held my breath....and then your words confirmed it! Sooo praying that God will allow this to go through to the end where you will be holding YOUR precious baby! I have goosebumps just from reading this. AHHHHHHHH!!!

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  62. I don't know you at all and my heart leapt in excitement for you.

    So happy. And praying God's protection over you all, the mom, the baby, and that this would all move forward as planned.

    Wow. :)

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  63. Tears of joy for you! I've been reading your blog now for a long time and have never commented...you guys will be awesome parents. So excited and happy for you!! Praying for the best!

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  64. I am so unbelievably happy for you! I cannot imagine the heartache of the last years, but I know without a doubt that it has shaped you into someone who will be the perfect mother to this sweet girl headed your way. Can't wait to see her! :) congratulations!

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  65. I don't "know" you, but I am so excited for you guys!!! You will be amazing parents and I can't wait to hear all of your adventures on this blog!!! I feel like this comment needs more exclamation points !!! !!! !!! !!! !!! !!! !!! !!! !!! !!! ;)

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  66. Soooo beyond thrilled for you guys!! Congrats! I've been following your blog since I was facing my own battle with infertility and have since been so lucky to be blessed with a baby boy of my own. I obviously don't know you IRL but I know you guys will be fabulous parents. Sending so many prayers that this will continue to be a happy and blessed journey to parenthood for both of you.

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  67. The moment I read the first line I wondered, and then I was nervous about thinking the wrong thing! So glad my anticipation is correct! Will be praying the Lord's Will is done, and that you soon have a baby in your arms! Thanks for sharing your joys! It gives me hope, even though I'm (not so) patiently waiting for something else!

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  68. OHMYGOSH!!!! I have goosebumps!I am so so so happy for your guys!!!! I was hoping that is what the title was all about! But you never know with you! You could have been chosen for a free vacation and been thrilled about it!! I am just overjoyed for you! I hope everything is smooth sailing! Keep us updated!!!!!!!!! CONGRATULATIONS!

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  69. so exciting, Erica!!!!!!!! OMG! congrats and I am so excited for you guys! SO GOOD!!!!!

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  70. Such wonderful news! Such a blessing. Congratulations!

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  71. I LOVE this!!! Congrats! Lord, we praise you for this day of celebration. We praise you for your complete soverignness - and we just thank you that your plans are ALWAYS better then ours. We ask that you would be with Erika, Matt, the birth mom and the baby over these next few weeks and month. We ask for protection over Erika's sweet baby and we pray you would continue to work in her heart as she preps to be a momma. We thank you that you are the author of life and we pray against anything that would keep moving this process forward! AMEN!!

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  72. Thank you for sharing your joy!!!! I am so very happy and excited for you. You have been and will remain in my prayers! What a blessed baby girl, she is! I can't wait to follow you through your coming adventures!!!

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  73. Oh, goodness. Tears over here!!! I have been following your blog for about six months now and infrequently comment...but this news? AMAZING!

    Thank you for sharing your exciting news with us.

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  74. That is awesome and amazing news!! So happy for y'all!

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  75. I am weeping, but they are happy tears! I saw your picture on instagram and immediately knew I had to jump on the blog and find out what's going on. I am so so so happy for you and Matt! Congratulations!

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  76. I don't know you, but I know of you through Colleen. She's told me about you and I am so happy to hear your news! God is so good! Blessings on your little one... Can't wait for her to be born!

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  77. I am so, so, so, so, happy with you!!! And so excited for this new adventure! Baby girl is already so, so loved! "You have been waiting far too long and now it's over. Your baby will be here soon." Tears, tears, tears of joy! Congratulations Mama!

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  78. This is... hands down... the best post I have ever read on the internet. Ever. GOD IS SO GOOD!!! I am gushing with happiness over here. Best news ever. Seriously. DECEMBER! That's like, tomorrow. Holy Moses. So, so, so SO happy for you. You deserve this so much.

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  79. I already tweeted you first thing this morning, but I AM SO HAPPY FOR YOU!!!! I just can't like this enough Mama!

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  80. Aaaaah!
    I am so happy for you, Matt and most especially the baby. That little soul finding her way into a loving family that knows Jesus as our Lord and savior.
    Yea Yea YEA! Thrilled to be able to be happy w/ you.

    Praise be God.

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  81. Praise The Lord!!!!!

    So very excited for you!!!!! God's timing is so perfect and you will know that even more when you see her sweet face.

    CONGRATULATIONS!

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  82. So I know I've already emailed, but I came home from work and read this post all over again and just couldn't keep from congratulating you again! What a beautiful blessing. :)

    So happy for you!

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  83. Aww! Congratulations! That baby girl is going to bring great joy in your life during the holidays bc u will be holding ur baby girl in ur arms soon.

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  84. FINALLY! Thank God. So happy for you!

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  85. This is THE BEST blog post! So very, very, VERY excited for you and Matt! Many prayers still being said for you and for all of the details that still need to be walked through. My favorite verse is Psalms 37:24, The Lord directs the steps of the godly, he delights in every detail of their lives! Can't wait to hear all of the details and how the Lord orchestrated this! Congrats new momma!

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  86. I am so, so, so, so happy for you! I know that in the infertility world, there are those who are a little cranky when things like this happen for others, but I am not a part of that group. I see every new (or soon-to-be) mommy as a victory for my home team. God bless you and that sweet baby girl. I know Elizabeth already got dibs on hosting, but I will be at that online baby shower with BELLS ON. <3

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  87. I've been reading your blog for awhile now, but rarely ever comment. I am so excited for you! I have no doubt you will be an awesome mommy!

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  88. Hi! Natasha from Here's the Scoop sent me here! Congrats! I look forward to following your journey along. =)

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  89. OMG!!! I just cried of joy reading this!! What a breath of fresh air reading a positive ending. Keeping all fingers crossed the whole process goes smoothly for you two. I cannot wait for December and see happy family pictures, you are already glowing!! Congrats guys.. This is amazing news :D Sending lots of love from Alberta Canada :P

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  90. Okay, so I took a brief hiatus from the blog world but that will NEVER happen again because of missing things like this! I know I don't know you well but I am literally sobbing tears of joy for you! Maybe that's crazy, maybe not, but I am so thrilled for you! I will be praying like crazy for you and that baby girl! Congratulations times a million!

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  91. Congratulations Erica! That is such awesome news! Jill and I went walking today and she told me the great news so I had to come read it for myself. I will be praying for yall as you wait for your sweet baby girl to arrive!

    Kelli Baumgartner

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  92. Thirty eight years ago my mom adopted me. I am so glad she had the love in her heart that only I could fill. We were just meant to be together, and we are still very close. : ) congratulations, sweet mama!!

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  93. Reading this made me teary eyed. I am so happy for you. Honest to GOODNESS y'all DESERVE IT! She will be so loved and cherished!!!! Congratulations over and over again!

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  94. Oh!!!!!! I haven't been able to check in on your blog in a while, and I am tearing up with happiness!!! YAY YAY YAYAYAY!!!!

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  95. Hi Erika, I'm a friend of Natasha's (http://daveandnatasha.blogspot.ca/) and have heard her speak about your journey before and seen your comments on her blog. I followed her link here and I am so excited for you and your family. I wish you all the best in these life-changing days!

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  96. We've never met but I've been following your blog since we had infertility issues also. I'm so happy for you!! I believe this will work out for you. I have another friend with a similiar situation that adopted their baby from birth and he's five months old now. Congrats and Best Wishes!! What a dream come true

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  97. Congratulations and lots of prayers for you!! I also live in Georgia and have 2 lovies adopted domestically in Georgia after infertility. Adoption is the best :))

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  98. Hi! Stopping by from Kelly's Korner. Congrats on your exciting news! I've been there and know exactly how you're feeling. We are currently waiting to adopt baby #2. Enjoy this exciting time of preparing and feel free to stop by and read our story.
    www.weareexpectingmiracles.blogspot.com

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  99. I am way behind on my blog reading, but I just read through all of September and burst into tears reading this. Congrats!!!!!!!!!

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