Thursday, September 5, 2013

the mexican awards ceremony

Sad but true- Vacation 2013 is over. Waaaahhhhhh!!!!! On a happier note, we made it home safely to a clean house and happy dog, so that definitely eased the pain. Oh, but you know what didn't ease the pain of returning? All this FALSE ADVERTISING ABOUT FALL that was rampant on social media the last few days. I mean, I was in Mexico, people, not outer space. Obviously I spent some (brief!) periods of time keeping myself up-to-date on all the important things happening on Twitter, FB, blogs, and the like. And what appeared to be happening was FALL. 'Oh, it's FALLL!!!!!' everyone said, as they talked about scarves and pumpkin flavored everything and Harvest candles. Yay for fall!! And I noticed that the month changed and it became September, and so I put two and two together, and so I dunno...I was rather expecting to step off the plane in Atlanta to some brisk mid-60s weather...some color-changing, falling leaves...our neighbors jumping in leaf piles and making bonfires. I dunno. Anything other than what actually happened, which was stepping out into air that is hotter and more humid than it was in Mexico, minus the breeze off the ocean, plus air pollution, minus fruity drinks, plus traffic. So thanks a lot for NOTHING, liars of social media + Georgia weather!

Anyway. Sorry for the anger. You know how it is, coming off a vacation high. You get a little emotionally unbalanced. Or maybe that's just me all the time. Who knows.

Instead of a full-out vacation recap, I decided to host my own little Vacation Awards Ceremony instead. This is kind of like a cross between the Oscars and high school yearbook superlatives. Or something. So get ready to meet the winners (and losers) of Matt y Erika's Mexican Extravaganza 2013!

Best Supporting Technology:

THE KINDLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I think that my next full-length limerick is going to be in honor of the Kindle. I can barely remember what international beach vacations used to be like in the pre-Kindle era, but I can only imagine they involved really heavy suitcases and very little freedom of reading choice. A sad world. Matt borrowed my mom's Kindle, I have my own, and there were very few minutes when we weren't both glued to our respective screens.

First Runner Up: the iPhone, taker of all 210 vacation photos.

Loser: the Canon dSLR, taker of 0 vacation photos. I don't know why I thought things would be different this year. This just in: it's still humid at the beach! Your lens is still going to get completely fogged! Someone please tell me next year not to bother hauling that thing all over the world. Stick with what works.

The 'Job' Award: Most Patient in the Midst of Inhumane (First World) Suffering- 

Matt during the Lost Luggage Saga!! 
 Here's how we got ourselves from Atlanta to Cancun: We got on an airplane in Atlanta. We got off the airplane in Cancun. It took approximately 2.5 hours. Ta-DAH! Done. Here's how one of our suitcases got from Atlanta to Cancun: it got on the airplane in Atlanta. It got off the airplane in Cancun. It took approximately 2.5 hours. GOLD STAR! Here's how the other suitcase got to Cancun: It got on a plane in Atlanta. It got off a plane in Atlanta. It got on another plane in Atlanta. It got off a plane in San Juan, Puerto Rico. It got on a plane in San Juan and then got off a plane in New York. It rested in New York for awhile and changed airlines. It tried to get on a plane to Cancun. It couldn't. It changed airlines again and went back to Atlanta. It got on a plane to Cancun. It got off the plane to Cancun. It changed airlines and got on a plane to Mexico City. It got to Mexico City. It got on a plane to Cancun. It got off a plane in Cancun. IT TOOK 3 DAYS. No gold stars. Black Xes and eternal hate and anger towards Delta from yours truly. In the meantime, Matt wore the same 2 shirts and 2 pair of shorts (luckily we'd thrown a change of clothes into our other suitcase), we both had only one pair of shoes (all our shoes were in the missing bag), we had to bum sunscreen off our friends (and mostly failed, therefore getting sunburns)...and one of us was super angry, stressed out, and bitter about this for three days. The other person was pretty chill and didn't complain much about having to spend all his time sitting in the room, waiting on incompetent Delta agents to return our calls. I'll let you figure out who's who in that scenario.

First Runner-Up: Me. At least I didn't kill anyone.

Related LIFETIME UNACHIEVEMENT AWARD goes to Delta Airlines for being stupid and pathetic.

Best Assisted Reproduction Award:

THIS GUY and his eager assistant, me! 
Did you know that sea turtles need loads of help reproducing? I think I kind of knew that. I think that in America we 'help' them by like...not turning on hotel lights on the beach or something. And leaving them alone. Well, just like in human reproduction...apparently some turtles need a little more HELP to get the job done...and I'm very sympathetic to that need. Obviously. So in Mexico, they help the process by burying all the eggs, keeping track of when they need to be dug up, and then helping dump the babies all into the water. And it's a group activity!! Look- I saved a bunch of sea turtles (and did not let birds eat them as they tried to run to the sea)!!! It was so freakin awesome and so completely illegal in America...that made it even more fun! Ha.

Best Color-Coordinating Wardrobe Award:

Matt y Erika!

 I mean, like there was any competition, really. Once we got the other suitcase, that is.

Best at Sleeping In Award:

Everyone except me. 
 Yall. I really suck at sleeping in at the beach. I'm up with the sunrise, ready and rarin' to go! Or...taking selfies with my sleeping husband, as the case may be. I can't help it. I get too excited. And hungry. And anxious to get a tan.

Best at Winning Every Competition:

The ladies!!!! 
 The moral of this story is: don't challenge us to anything and expect us not to win. Simple.

Best at Bringing Joy to People's Hearts:

This Bellhop, upon delivering our long-lost suitcase!
 Not that he really had anything to do with it besides lugging it up a few floors, but he was the recipient of about five billion 'THANK YOU!!!!!!s' (and pesos) when he knocked on our door that night!

Most Committed to the Dawgs Award:

Matt, Erika, Adam, y Jessie!!!!

We celebrated Game Day and cheered on the Dawgs from the comfort of room 2350. We were SUPER excited that one of the approximately 4 English-speaking channels just so happened to be ABC- and it was broadcasting our game!! So we didn't have to watch from an iPad!!! We celebrated with room service, Mexican junk food, and halftime trips to the bar downstairs. Even though we didn't win, it was a great way to kick off the season!

Most Memorable Quote of the Trip:

This award goes to JESSIE! 

...and truer words have never been spoken. Can I get an amen?

The Lifetime Achievement in Dessert Award:

Like there was even any competition. COTTON CANDY NIGHT!!!

It was really tough that the fresh cotton candy night was also the same night as the fresh churros (I mean, frying them RIGHT THERE IN FRONT OF YOU), but I managed to buckle down and eat a respectable amount of both desserts. That's dedication, yall.

Runner Up: Churros, obviously.

Loser: this weird stuff I thought was going to be cheesecake one night. And it wasn't. And I don't know what it was but it WAS NOT CHEESECAKE and it was weird.

The 'Bringing Sexy Back': Sombrero Edition Award-

Mattie B!!!!! 
 Ow ow ow!!!!! If sombreros and v-necks don't make your heart pitter-patter, I don't know what will. Stand back, ladies. This one's all mine!

There are plenty more awards and pictures and stories to share, but no more time today! I look forward to catching up with everyone...and catching up with blogs...and catching up with work...and catching up with bills...and well, coming back to 'real life' is never easy, but I'm sure I'll catch up eventually! Happy whatever the heck non-fall day it is!


  1. I still love that you guys convinced another couple to go with you - Wade and I like vacationing by ourselves, but I feel like at some point during our trips we always find ourselves wishing we had company! Glad y'all had a great trip!

  2. Fun times! We've vacationed with friends before and I like it so much better! The girls can go off and do what they want and so can the guys!

  3. your trip looks like such a blast! totally sucks that your bag was lost tho, i'd be so mad! how does that happen when you are on a direct flight? crazy. but i agree, kindles on vacation are the best thing ever! glad you had a blast!

  4. I think I want to travel with your suitcase...San Juan, Cancun, New York! You would be the runner up, of course. We've never done and all-inclusive and might need to give it a shot.

  5. I LOVE this post!! And I love the fact that you took selfies in bed while Matt was snoozin'!!

  6. You are too funny! Looks like an amazing trip, but I am selfishly so glad to have you back in the US and posting in only Erika style. Missed you!!!

  7. 1. I have debated telling you this because too little too late, but Mix and Match Mama (Sean the Bachelor's sister) travels a ton and she recommends packing half and half, just in case your suitcase gets lost.
    2. Was the not-cheesecake flan? Because flan is disgusting.
    3. Looks like y'all had a great time, despite the lack of additional clothing. Now I'm excited you're back to blogging every day.

  8. Welcome home! I'm super sorry Georgia didn't deliver with the fall weather! I personally would have liked nothing better than to welcome you home with a good 70 degree day. It sounds like you had a really good time, even with only one pair of shoes for half the trip. Matt is a total trooper! I would have been PISSED!

    Can you blog all weekend? Missed you!!!

  9. Yayyyyy! You're back! And your awards ceremony practically made me feel like I went on a vacation last week, too! Only not really...

    So glad you guys had a great time, though; your trip looked like a blast (minus the lost luggage bueno)! My favorite photo award goes to you and the infant sea turtle. Runner-up is the selfie in bed with Matt sound asleep--cracks me up!

    Welcome home!!

  10. Sorry you had to come back from vacation! But I'm so glad you are bringing back some wonderful memories!! Besides Delta and their stupid luggage handling.

  11. I love this post. I love you! I can always count on you to boost my mood and make me smile ☺
    P.S. your captcha still hates me. I don't think it likes Canadiens!

  12. So glad y'all had a good trip, love the awards. You are so funny. Heartbroken the dawgs lost, but maybe this weekend we will make a comeback?! One can hope!

  13. Hilarious recap as always!
    Reason 1,978 why I refuse to check luggage. If you ever need tips on how not to check let me know. We did three weeks in Europe with no checking!
    Love the tan lines! Super jealous.
    Glad you guys got some R&R in the SUN.

  14. The baby sea turtle is so epic. I held one, one time, in the ocean in Florida. He just swam right by me and I scooped his up and named him Ryan and gave him air kisses. In the meantime my sister was swimming away from me yelling about how this was illegal and apparently the underwater international ocean police were due any minute.

    Love the recap. I really hope Delta will give you some comp tickets.

  15. You should give out the "Most Jealous of Erika's Vacation" award to one of your lucky readers... me.

  16. Such a fun post! Sorry your luggage was three days late; that suuuuucks. Welcome home!

  17. Looks like you had a great time!!! I looove the little sea turtles, so cute!! God love em for needing a little extra help in the baby-turtle-making department!

  18. Fabulous fabulous fabulous!!! How lucky are you to have found cotton candy on your Mexican vacation?!
    I have to tell you that losing one of my bag en route is a fear of mine. I'm sure it happens quite often and the customer service agents hate taking those calls, but what a way to ruin a trip! Yuck :(

  19. So glad you had a great time and love all of the photos!! I'm with you on this NOT fall business. I've read everywhere about fall food, candles and coffee and it's still 100 degrees, so as far as I'm concerned it's still summer people!

  20. Looks like u had a fantabulous time in ur vaca. U are absolutely right about how unbalanced u feel comin back from vaca. I can't imagine going three full days w/o my luggage. Grrr!!

  21. You totally need to come visit me now. Our low tonight is 3C, there's a risk of frost and I'm sitting here in my housecoat and drinking hot tea because I ABSOLUTELY REFUSE to turn on the furnace on September 5. Blah :(

    I love your vacation awards. You should do this with your non-vacation life too!

  22. Welcome home! I was not responsible for the fall fake out. Houston is as hot as heck. Fall nowhere to be found here!

    I want to hold a baby sea turtle!

  23. And this is why you're my favorite blogger. SO glad you had a great time!!

  24. So glad you had a great trip!!! Minus the suitcase situation. Back to reality for both of us :(

  25. This is the best vacation recap ever. I never read vacation posts on blogs, but this was fun :)

    I love your color coordinating! Craig gets so weird about it when we match.

  26. This was hilarious & so much fun to read! Best vaca recap EVER. Haha!

  27. baby sea turtles, baby sea turtles!!



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