a limerick about yard work. no, seriously.

An office worker by day am I-
With air conditioning and much coffee, the hours go by.
    Editing webpages all day,
    Proofing grammar-- oy vey.
While my heart longs for green grass and blue sky.

So when five o'clock comes and I leave,
From climate-controlled buildings I seek my reprieve.
    Discarding wedges and trendy shirt
    Donning old Asics, stained with dirt,
And to my dreams of being a farmer I cleave.

"Dibs on the tractor!" to the husband I say,
For its power and speed call to me this day.
    And as I circle 'round and 'round
    Piles of wet grass and angry ants abound,
As I gleefully race my trusty steed through the fray.

 
And the husband watches warily on
As I cluelessly surge across the lawn,
    For it happens every time
    (I'm kinda helpless, is that a crime?)
That the thing breaks, and Matt's help is called upon.

 
But such a mower-fixer as he you've never met,
A handy skill when you're married to me, I bet.
    For in all my exhilaration
    I lack the proper concentration
And paying attention to what I'm doing? I forget.

For when I'm up on my mower, you see
Going fast and turning donuts fills me with glee!
    And the more mundane things-
    Like going straight and listening for strange pings?
Well, those things from my consciousness do flee.

 
But since Matt's skills are always up to speed,
It's back to business in no time- on my steed!
     Bringing order to my land
     As I raise up my hand
And salute my farm-boy, though 'slow down!' his eyes plead.

As I circle around again
I smile and I laugh in the wind-
     I get the best of both worlds,
     Farmer life and office girl.
(And a husband with a lovely back end.)
 

 
PS. It's my seven-hundredth post! You should offer a toast!