ridiculous.

Today turned out to be a ridiculously fun day. And I even have a few (hundred, but I'll spare you) pictures to prove it!

First thing this morning I went on a run (generous terminology) with Cat. The weather was perfect, and going for a run on a Saturday morning just basically makes me feel like I'm winning at life.

Then we came home and Matt joined us to OD on pumpkin spice waffles. And pumpkin spice coffee.

Then we hit up the library and a thrift store.

THEN Matt and I got ready to attend a 2:00 wedding for old friends of his. Although I've met them many times, I knew I wouldn't really know anyone at the wedding. Luckily, Matt's brother Stephen is also friends with the guy, so Stephen and Jessica came down from Charlotte for the wedding. So I was excited to get to spend a few hours with Jessica (who also wouldn't really know anyone).

After I dominated a Catholic wedding mass (considering I've been Protestant most of my life, I can hang pretty well with a Catholic wedding. Spending summers at Mass with Catholic family members obviously paid off), we headed to the reception venue for the cocktail hour. 

The weather was absolutely perfect for the indoor-outdoor reception. We spent most of the afternoon/evening outside, and the grounds were beautiful.

Here I am with my crew. It was such fun being able to spend time with Jess and Steve-- especially with someone else providing and funding the food and beverages! 

Jessica cut her bangs so that she could be just like me. Aren't we cute??!

Once the sun went down, Jessica and I (with Matt and Stephen occasionally joining us) dedicated our lives to tearing up the dance floor. I feel like we were enormously successful, given how extremely sore, sweaty, and hoarse I was once the DJ shut it down. I was a big fan of the DJ and all of the people requesting music (like us). We enjoyed a wide variety of tunes, including Sexy and I Know It, Gangnam Style, Livin' on a Prayer, Wobble, and Ice Ice Baby. Basically it was awesome. 

After dancing we waved sparklers while the bride and groom left. Notice that my hair-- which I actually WORE DOWN and STYLED for once-- has migrated back into its normal twisty bun position. Long hair is no bueno on the dance floor. Here I am a hot, sweaty, nasty, happy mess.

All in all, the afternoon/night was fantastic. And I would be remiss to finish my summary without sharing the words of wisdom Jessica bestowed upon me early in the evening (before dancing) when I expressed that I was feeling a tiny bit cold. "You're cold? Drink more alcohol! It warms you up! I mean...that's what homeless people do..."

Upon coming home, we spent some time chatting with our roomies about the phenomena of people using their children's/baby's pictures as their own FB profile picture. Cat happens to be one of those people, because-- and I quote-- "I just don't like any pictures of myself."

Determined to remove that barrier to her FB profile picture freedom, I took it upon myself to "fix" one of her pictures to make it a little...better.

What can I say? I'm a giver. Profile picture conundrum SOLVED!

Thanks to PicMonkey for the amazing special effects. 

And with that, my evening of ridiculousness is complete. 

worst blogger ever?

I think I deserve the Worst Blogger Ever award this week. I mean, what kind of person just drops off the face of the earth (after leaving you with some admittedly freakin' hilarious reading material) and ceases to blog for like...3 whole days? Apparently...me. Anyways. My guilty conscience has me here trying to fill the blogging void in my heart at 11pm on a Friday night.

Here's the things that've been absorbing my time and thoughts this week:

1. Pumpkin stuff. It's a little bit out of control this year. Here are a few things I came home with from a trip to Trader Joe's this week. As a note-- these are all repeat purchases. As in...I've already bought them at least once this fall and ran out and am back for more. I just felt like that was relevant information.

Basically, I need my mouth to taste like fall at all times. Also, on this particular trip to TJs, I noticed that there were pumpkin spice DOG TREATS. Amazingly, I resisted the urge to let Lola in on my pumpkin love-fest. 

2. I got my bribe cookies from Canada!!!

What could be in this mysterious box?

Just some amazingly delicious (and still chewy) double chocolate chip cookies from Natasha in CANADA!!!!

And to answer the inevitable question-- no, they did not come via UPS. Looks like the good ol' regular USPS took care of the delivery. But I wasn't even home when they came, so it really didn't matter at all. In the end, homemade Canadian cookies are fantastic no matter who delivers them to your doorstep. (Note to blog readers in other countries: My next life goal is to receive cookies from a non-North American country. I know you guys are out there--just let me know if you want to help this dream come true!! Haha.)

3. Related to #1 & #2...I made my official Zumba comeback this week!! I haven't been since JUNE, when I had my unfortunate foot injury. And then surgery in August. And then I got better from surgery, but my foot is still stupid. But then I committed my life to eating pumpkin-flavored junk food and Canadian cookies and if I ever hope to fit into my clothes, I'm going to have to say DAMN THE TORPEDOS (or foot, as the case may be), FULL SPEED  AHEAD (to Zumba). And so I did, on Wednesday, and it was GREAT!! I definitely took it a little easy, modifying all of the jumping moves, but judging by the way my entire body (not just my foot) feels like I was ran over by a truck even two days later...I will call it a rousing success. I can't wait to get back into going regularly (and not looking like a professional cookie eater anymore).

4. Finally, I've been completely absorbed in my NEW FAVORITE BOOKS EVER. And yes, I find new favorite books every single week. But that doesn't make it any less thrilling. Trust me. Anyway-- THESE books are filling the Hunger Games-shaped hole in my heart. I have a love for young adult dystopian novels, but the recent rash of poorly written HG knock-offs is NOT what I'm jonesing for. Luckily, I happened upon "The Last Years" series (only 2 books so far, will eventually be four-- a quadrilogy??) the other day.

source

I managed to snag the first book, Whispers in Autumn, for free on my Kindle (it's now back to $3.99). It was SO GOOD! It felt like a really good mash-up of Hunger Games and the Giver, obviously two of my favorite books/series of all time. There were quite a few new/different elements to the story/world, though, so it felt fresh and new, and the story was fantastic. This is the author's first novel and I was SO impressed. Actually, I pretty much want to be best friends with the author, Trisha Leigh. So Trisha Leigh, if you're out there and you read this, call me, maybe? I think we could be besties. This book actually made me SO happy that upon finishing it I immediately downloaded AND PAID FOR the second book, Winter Omens.

source

The fact that I paid for it should really tell you something, because I really despise paying for books. And I was super willing to pay for this one. And I just finished reading it a few minutes ago and am now basically dying inside until the next one comes out (which I believe will be in December? Trisha Leigh, can I get like an advanced copy or something? Since we're BFF? Kthanks) So anyways, if you have no exciting weekend plans, you should go read both of these books (in order). I'm letting my roomie Cat read them (on my Kindle) now, but after she's done, if anyone wants me to do the Kindle-share thing, I'd be happy to let you borrow them. But seriously, the $8 investment would be well worth it to just get them now. So don't delay. 

Whew. Well, now that I've unloaded all those exciting stories on you (just pretend they were exciting, okay?)...I think I need to hit the sack. Tomorrow promises to be full of fun things (like a wedding! and pretty weather!), and then Sunday is WALKING DEAD DAY...so...right. I need my rest. Happy Weekend to you!

people are funny

Today I came across a few things on the internet that made me laugh so hard I cried. And then I found something that was so touching and happy, it made me cry, too. So basically, no matter what in life I hear/think/see/do, I end up crying. Mascara is never safe with me. Annoying.

But right now I'm going to share a few of the positive tear-inducing things I came across. Because I know everyone needs a good laugh.

So you already know that one of the best things about the internet is that you can research ANYTHING before you buy it. And the best source of information for said research is customer reviews, because CUSTOMERS can be trusted. COMPANIES cannot. Since I spend about 90% of my free time downloading and reading books, I consequently spend a lot of time reading book reviews on Amazon. Most of them are helpful and informative, if a bit boring. But sometimes...sometimes they are not.

Today a friend pointed me in the direction of some hands-down FREAKIN HILARIOUS customer reviews on Amazon. And then I found some more on my own. And then I laughed until I cried. And I felt happy knowing that there are such funny people on this planet. And I hope I can meet them all someday. Or at least find more things that they wrote. So here's what you need to do. Go to the following product pages and READ A FEW REVIEWS. And enjoy.

First and foremost, please go read all about the Hutzler Banana Slicer.

source

 I know, what could possibly be funny about a banana slicer? I'll tell you: a lot. Just trust me.


Next, you may find yourself wanting to purchase a book entitled How To Avoid Huge Ships.

source

Because I don't know how you've even made it this far in life without the knowledge that this book contains. Seriously. According to many commenters, Captain Trimmer's authoritative tome on the topic has timely and relevant information, although many lamented that they didn't read this book until it was too late.

Afterwards, feel free to peruse Bic Cristal for Her pens.

source

And...I'm just going to entice you with a simple screenshot-sample of the amazing reviews this product garnered:

Yes, so, basically...if you are a company busy creating a ridiculous product, don't think you're going to get away with it unscathed. Also, People of the World: Writing funny/sarcastic reviews is a FAR PREFERABLE way to express your disdain for something than like...getting all political, boycotting, or otherwise acting obnoxious. Let's use that energy for something positive, like writing hilarious fake reviews. Thanks.

And finally, the one kind of story/video that guarantees to make me cry happy tears 100% of the time: a surprise military homecoming. This one happened to occur at the (otherwise awful) Georgia-South Carolina football game last weekend. At least something good came out of that hot mess of a game.

Soldier Surprises Family at South Carolina Football Game

With that, I can sign off feeling like I have positively contributed to the world today. Go forth and enjoy! (And be sure to share any other hilarious reviews you've come across. I really don't get tired of them.)

my awesome life

Just in case there were any doubts about how awesome I am:

This is how I spent this afternoon, in celebration of the nice cool weather. One of my (many) Snuggies, my beloved Kindle, and a nice cuppa decaf (which I just spelled "decalf," by the way...weird) on the front porch. Welcome to my awesome life. Please ignore the fact that my front flower bed is growing out of control and spilling vines all over the porch. And that most of the potted plants have died. 

That's about all I have to say today. Oh, I thought I should clarify something about the corn maze from my last post. It was not the haunted/spooky variety. Just a regular ol' nighttime corn maze. I don't think I could handle the man-chasing-you-with-a-chainsaw kind. Although on a related note, this year in Athens there is a Zombie Farm haunted house farm-type thing that opened up. I'm actually kinda wanting to go, because I totally love zombies.

And on that note, can we all just spend a moment reflecting and SQUEEEEEALING with joy that Walking Dead returns in LESS THAN A WEEK??!?!??!! I can barely focus on life right now, so great is my excitement.

And on that note, I'm done.