NO MORE BABY BOYS!

Millie is ALL ABOUT some imaginative play lately. It honestly makes life really fun- except for when I don't play my role properly and I get reprimanded, of course.

Generally this is how things go:

1. Millie decides she is something else. This is often an animal (typically giraffe, manatee, lion, alligator, or dinosaur), but is sometimes a different type of person (princess, teacher, mommy), or imaginary creature (monster), or my favorite- inanimate object (lately...table. Yep. "I'm a table!").

2. Generally, as soon as she's decided what she is, she will tell me and/or Matt what we are. 99% of the time we all assume the 'mommy, daddy, baby' versions of whatever the creature is: Mommy Manatee, Daddy Manatee, Baby Manatee; Mommy Monster, Daddy Monster, Baby Monster. Sometimes we also get an adjective describing our temperament as well: Nice Mommy Monster, Mean Daddy Alligator. Sometimes our role doesn't match our actual human role- I might be Baby Lion, Matt is Mommy Lion, Millie is Nice Daddy Lion.

3. Then we basically just carry on with our normal activities, but we all have to refer to each other by our proper titles. If there are fitting noises or motions that go with whatever we are (growling, galloping, etc.), we have to do that too.

4. This continues until Millie decides we are done. When she tires of being Baby Giraffe, she will just say "we not giraffes anymore. Now we just people!"

4b. But if in the course of this playtime Matt or I manages to anger/sadden/bother Millie and she is getting huffy, she ends the game by angrily yelling "we not ANYFING!!! You not a lion!! You just NOTHING!!! And I NOTHING!!! We not NOTHING (pronounced 'nuffing') ANYMORE!!!" and I must confess, it's about 50/50 sad and hilarious.

Last week she introduced two new personas to the mix. Each of them basically slayed me, so I need to share.

1. Voldemort.

As in, Harry Potter's Voldemort. "I Baby Voldemort, you Mommy Voldemort, and Daddy is Daddy Voldemort." 

Obviously she has no idea who Voldemort is, or why there can't BE a Mommy and Daddy Voldemort. She only knows the word because the other night she said something about how she didn't have a nose, so I offhandedly said "who are you, Voldemort?" and she responded by yelling "YES, I VOLDEMORT!!" and so I (properly) responded by shrieking in fear and hiding under a pillow, which meant that she continued declaring herself to be Voldemort for like 20 minutes, and then declaring us to be her corresponding Mommy and Daddy Voldemort. All she knows is that Voldemort is scary, which is fine because she loves being scary.

The best part is that she has several times since wanted to be Voldemort again but she can't remember the name, so she'll get this 'scary' look on her face and say "I....MOL...VA...DOR...DAT SCARY GUY DAT MAKE YOU SCWEAM!!!"

2. Mean Pharaoh.

We can thank her daycare for this one- last week's Bible story was about Baby Moses. I discovered this when Millie responded to my "what did you learn at school today?" question with "NO MORE BABY BOYS!!!!", complete with a really scary face and waving her arms around in a kinda slicing manner. 

"No more baby boys??" I asked.

"NO MORE BABY BOYS!!! I A MEEEEEAN KING!!! You put your baby in a basket, Mommy. NO MORE BABY BOYS!!"

Ooooooh. Pharaoh and baby Moses, got it, thanks.

So in about five minutes, she was Baby Pharaoh, I was Mommy Pharaoh, and Matt was Daddy Pharaoh. Don't worry, that all makes sense. Then we all just ran around screaming "NO MORE BABY BOYS!!!" together, like any family of mean pharaohs. 

A few times Millie has changed the rules and become Nice Pharaoh. Nice Pharaoh says "You can have some baby boys, okay?!" and then looks expectantly at me like I might just birth a baby boy then and there out of gratitude. Hasn't happened yet, but I guess she'll keep trying.

I not scared, Mommy- he onwy made of pwastic!!

the biggest

In case you weren't aware...Millie is a BIG GIRL now.

She wears "WEAL" [real] makeup "wike Mommy!!" And she has that smoldering model stare down pat, right? 

That's not all. I'll transcribe some Millie narration to tell you what other exciting things are in store for her.

"I get my BIG GUHL BED!! I get a BIG BED wike DADDY and MOMMY!! And I seeeeeep in it. And when I awake, I wake up EVEYONE! I say GOOD MORNING FWIENDS! And den I put on my BIG GUHL makeup. WIKE MOMMY!! And den I eat my nanny [banana]."

That's right. The Big Girl Bed is coming. Should be on my porch this evening, actually. I am both super excited and not at all ready for this.

Reasons I'm Looking Forward to the Big Girl Bed:
1. Not having to heave 35 pounds of love in and out of the crib every day.
2. We can lay down in bed with her to rub her back instead of losing all feeling in our arms reaching over the crib rails.
3. Ummm...I like shopping and buying things. Purchasing a bed, mattress, and bedding was all very fun.
4. When she wakes up in the morning and wants to come lay in bed with us, she can come on over without us having to get out of bed.

Reasons I'm Not So Much:
1. When she wakes up in the middle of the night and wants to come lay in bed with us, she can come on over.
2. When she wakes up in the middle of the night and wants to play with toys, help herself to food in the fridge, wander around the darkened house, turn on the TV, etc....she can.
3. We will have to take apart the crib. The thought makes me sob.

So yes, many mixed emotions. But once we do it, there's really no going back, right? She is SUCH a good sleeper (minus an occasional desire for snuggles in the middle of the night) and I worry that not being confined to her crib could totally ruin that. But once we take the crib apart and move it to the attic...I mean, we're not getting it back down and putting it back together. Not for Millie, anyway. So what do I do if she doesn't stay in her bed?!

Ugh.

We keep telling ourselves that just because they deliver the bed and mattress doesn't mean we have to put it in her room. Hahaha. It can live in boxes in the guest room for a few more weeks or years if the time doesn't feel optimal, right? Right.

How is it possible that this love is almost THREE?! I dressed her up in this smocked number the other week so that I could pretend she was a baby. Ha. She was not impressed with how the long dress cramped her running and climbing style.

Summer is swimming along quite beautifully! Although it's always a bit of a bummer realizing that summer for a dual-working-parent household (where neither of us are teachers) doesn't involve months away from work, there are still plenty of perks to make life feel special. Mainly my in-laws' pool.

We haven't done swimming lessons this summer yet (and not sure if we will...to be honest, I prefer spending my Saturdays actually just playing and lounging around the pool instead of being in lessons, haha), but Millie is doing great in the water! She loves her puddle jumper and paddles all around the pool independently. She definitely can't really swim, but she does a good toddler version of swimming when she's being held afloat by the puddle jumper! She's jumped off the diving board a few times, but prefers to just sit on it. She doesn't mind getting her face wet, but doesn't actively seek out the situation, haha. Which is fine with me, because she still has tubes in her ears and wearing ear plugs never happens, so...no need to spend more time underwater than necessary.

We've worked out a pretty sweet system for most of our Saturdays. We head over to Matt's parents' house around lunchtime, eat, and then Millie goes down for her nap in her crib at their house. Then Matt and I get an hour or two to lounge and read by the pool- BLISS. Then when Millie wakes up, we suit her up and spend the rest of the afternoon splashing and swimming and getting decidedly less reading done. It's wonderful! Although I must admit that every week I think "wow, she has been swimming and jumping and going for five hours...she must be exhausted! I bet she is going to sleep GREAT tonight! We will probably have to wake her up for church tomorrow!"

(picture that emoji face where the eyes and mouth are all horizontal lines)

Sure, she goes to bed great...as usual. Sure, she wakes up at 6:30 a.m...as usual. Apparently the sun and swimming just don't exhaust Millie the same way they exhaust me. 

But I wouldn't trade any of it for anything. Not a minute of it. 

Oh, speaking of being grown and big... in case you've missed all of our breaking news (lol) on Instagram and/or Facebook, you should know that Millie has a baby in her tummy. The picture above reminded me. The baby had a lot of opinions while we were picking blueberries that day. Generally the baby in her tummy (no name, sorry) just dictates Millie's hunger (not so unlike REAL babies en utero, right? How does she know this?!)..."I yike dese bluebewwies, Mama! Dey make my baby so HAPPY!" "I not eat dat hamburger, Mama. It make my baby cwy. She no wike it." But sometimes the baby gets fussy, as babies do, and then Millie is able to conveniently pull her out and rock her or pat her back until she calms down. Then she puts her back in her belly. So apparently Millie is actually a marsupial, but let's not get hung up on technicalities. THIS KID. She just cracks me up!!

millie-isms: part V

WHOA. Huge realization. I believe Millie is approaching the age/stage/conversational ability that she will be able to answer one of those "parent questionnaire" things that everyone loves to do around Mother's Day or whatnot...you know, "how old is your mom? What is her favorite thing to do?," etc. Also known as something I've been waiting for for seven billion years. I'll hold out hope that her teachers and/or father make this dream come true for me in the next few months. In the meantime, she says plenty of other funny stuff to keep me rolling.

(Pictures that accompany these stories are entirely unrelated, but cute, right?)

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We are sitting at the table, calmly eating breakfast. Millie looks up and her eyes light up.

"Mama! Let's go play upstairs, otay?"

Me, extremely confused: "Ummm...Millie, we don't have an upstairs."

Millie, extremely confused: "Why?"

Me: "Because we've never had an upstairs? Because we live in a one-story house?"

Millie: "Why?"

Good question. Let me time travel back and ask 2009 Erika what she was thinking.

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Matt is holding Millie and we (Matt & I) are laughing about something. All of a sudden, Millie exclaims "DAT NO FUNNY!"

We stop laughing, only we kinda can't, because her outburst is so random and so funny in itself.

"What's not funny, Millie?"

"No laugh. No 'ha ha ha ha ha!!'" (She says her 'ha ha ha's in the most sarcastic voice a two-year-old can muster.)

You try not laughing after a scolding like that.

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On multiple occasions (like, maybe 5), when we pull our car into the Target parking lot, Millie immediately screams "HOOOOME!!! We home!!!"

Please note that she does not say this when we actually arrive to our actual (disappointingly one-storied) home. She has done it twice when we pull into our church parking lot. So, home=Target and sometimes church. There's something just beautiful and strange about that.

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I have an Apple Watch, and one of the fun features is that you can activate Siri by just turning your wrist and saying "Hey Siri," followed by whatever you want her to do. One thing I find myself doing semi-regularly is requesting that Siri set a timer for two minutes, because a certain member of our household sometimes needs to spend two minutes thinking about her life and choices occasionally. 

So when Millie is playing with her dolls and animals, you may find her sternly reprimanding the doll for some terrible transgression, and the conversation goes something like this:

"NO! You NO BITE. Dat NOT NICE. You go time out."

(she puts her wrist up to her mouth and yells at her wrist) " TWO MINUTES! Hey do two minutes!"

(talking to her doll again) "You sit two minutes! You wait for my watch make sound, otay! NO BITE! Two minutes!"

Then she stares at her doll, intermittently glancing at her wrist. If her doll gets wiggly (in her imagination, I suppose, since our dolls are all inanimate as far as I know...), she doesn't give in.

"Hey!! No two minutes yet! My watch NO MAKE SOUND. You sit. TWO MINUTES!"

I promise I am not as mean as she makes it sound. Because now I'm so paranoid about the whole thing, I can barely even bring myself to sit her in time out. Ha!

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Millie has gotten where she loves for us to scratch her back. She likes us to pull up her shirt and scratch away. So the other evening, I was scratching as requested. Apparently my hand went a little further than she cared for, and she exclaims "No! No scratch my booty! Poop-poop in my booty!!"

You can't argue with logic like that.

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At breakfast, Matt and I were discussing who would pick Millie up from school that afternoon. She is listening carefully and pipes in with some clarifying questions:

"Mommy pick me up today?"

"Yes, Mommy is going to pick you up."

"Pick me up and go to doc-tuh?"

"No, baby...pick you up to go home. Do you need to go to the doctor?"

[wide eyes] "Go to doc-tuh to cut open my nose and get food?"

So apparently last week's lesson did sink in and is weighing heavy on her mind, just as I'd hoped. Ha!

shenanigans

Life with a 2.5-year-old is never boring, I can tell you that much. Here are some recent highlights.

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Please note her tattoo and earrings.

Millie loves dinosaurs right now. This makes me inexplicably happy because, a) it's just really cute, and b) I myself was obsessed with dinosaurs as a child (although not when I was quite this young), so I can relate. So we read a lot of books about dinosaurs, we roar and chase each other around, and for the last few days, Millie starts each morning by telling us what kind of dinosaur we are. She decides this based on what color shirt each person is wearing. So as I carry her into the kitchen, as she's still bleary and rubbing the sleep from her eyes, she's inspecting all of our outfits so that she can declare "Daddy green di-saur, Mommy purple di-saur, Millie red di-saur, Lola black di-saur!" If you change clothes later, she will tell you that "you no purple di-saur now, you blue di-saur!" or whatever. It's precious. Also, she's good at colors.

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She started taking ballet lessons this month!

Obviously this picture is in our yard and not during a class, but the cuteness is the same no matter where you are.

There's a studio that goes into local daycares/preschools and offers classes during the day, so that's what we're doing. It's nice because we don't have to give up a Thursday evening or Saturday morning or whatever to do an "extracurricular," but the sad part is that I don't actually get to watch the lessons. They send pictures, though, and Millie is usually happy to demonstrate what she learned that day, and I can definitely tell she's on track to be a professional ballerina. Hahaha. In related news, toddler ballet clothing is unbearably cute and I will be accepting donations to help with my new ballet shopping addiction.

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Not to boast, but the time change has been awesome for us. She sleeps harder and longer than ever before, and now we have actual DAYLIGHT in the evenings so that we can play outside or go on a walk after dinner. Life is infinitely better with that little luxury! This girl loves being outside, so we have had a lot of fun with this mild "winter" and spring!

We dusted off our bikes for a family ride a few weekends ago. We found some goats that were SO adorable. Now I have dreams of being a goat farmer. 

My ancient (seriously, 13 years old) cat Aidan is still hanging around, and he and Millie are the best of frenemies. Warm days mean they have time to antagonize each other. How lovely.

Millie has also had time to devise ways to swing with her baby dolls, which resulted in this heartwarming scene:

Precious, yes?

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This face may look cute and innocent to you, but shortly before I snapped this photo, we'd spent some harrowing and nasty moments digging a PEA out of Millie's nose. Yep. Shoved it (on purpose) right up the ol' nostril! Way to be a toddler, Millie!

It took us several attempts and combinations of tools to find success, but what ended up working was using the Nose Frida (hello, old friend!) to get the pea towards the opening, and then reaching in with tweezers to close the deal. And this only worked while she was sitting/standing up, so that gravity was working WITH us- we initially had her laying down, but the stupid thing kept rolling back as soon as we touched it. I hope you never need to know this strategy, but just in case...there ya go. I don't think that WE will ever need to use it again, because a) we're never having peas again, and b) we put the fear of God blood in Millie by telling her that it is NOT SAFE to have a pea in her nose, and if Mommy and Daddy couldn't get it out, we would have to take her to the hospital and they would cut her nose open with a knife and there would be LOTS OF BLOOD. So maybe we had to exaggerate a little, but I think it worked, because if there's anything she doesn't like, it's blood. And things that are "not safe." Deeming things "not safe" is one of her current methods of (trying) to get out of things she's not interested in doing.

"Time to brush your teeth, Millie!"

"No! Dat not safe!!"

???

"Can you get in your car seat, Mills?"

"No please, Mommy. Dat not safe!"

It is literally the safest thing on the market. Buckle up, cowgirl.

****

Speaking of things on the market...

Here's something you need to be buying ASAP.

Reasons You Should Not Buy This Ice Cream:

1. You hate things that are delicious.

2. You don't want to weep with happiness.

3. You are satisfied with a mediocre life.

4. You have a life-threatening pecan, truffle, or fudge allergy. (However, if you just have a normal-level allergy that could be helped with just an epi-pen or a few days in the hospital, it's probably worth the risk.)

That's really all I can think of. Now, some of you may say "hey, that's a Publix-brand ice cream, and I don't live anywhere near a Publix," and to you I say "Delta is ready when you are." Seriously. I'm sure wherever you live is great, but so is the southeast, and WE have Publix and nine months of humidity and heat strokes  summer, so like...get moving.

And in case you were wondering, YES, Millie does approve of this ice cream and also has declared it to be safe, so...the end.

millie-isms: part IV

Let's pretend I didn't just go an entire month without blogging, okay? Thanks!

My girl is funnier, sassier, and more opinionated than ever these days! She is learning words and concepts so quickly, I can barely keep up. We already have to spell things (like "oh, Matt, I brought home some C-A-K-E that we can eat after M-I-L-L-I-E goes to B-E-D!"), lest we have to share our junk food with her. Here are some of my favorite recent Millie-isms.

1. I've been going to physical therapy for awhile now to help my neck and shoulder (diagnosis: carrying-a-heavy-toddler-itis). (P.S. Unrelated to Millie, but just so you know- I go twice a week for a little over an hour each time and for that whole hour I lay there and have my neck and shoulder rubbed and massaged. It's not the worst medical condition to have, haha! Can't say I'm really praying for a quick healing...hahahaha.) This week, things got real-er, though, and my PT sent me home with a stetchy band and some exercises to start practicing at home. Boooo. Anyway, so I've been doing the exercises in the bathroom while Millie takes her bath at night. I have to do 30 reps of 4 different exercises, and understandably, they get a little painful on my wonky shoulder. So it's possible that while I'm counting out my repetitions, I occasionally say "owwwwww" and make a grimacing face. And it didn't take Miss Observant long to figure that out, because about five minutes into my first "exercise" night, she started mimicking me from the bath. "two...five...nine...OWWWWW!!!!!" (devious giggles) "two...fiiiive...niiiiine...OWWWWW!!!!" (exaggerated pain on her face, lots of laughing)

It's the funniest thing ever. Nothing gets by her! Watching me do my exercises is now her most favorite thing to do, and if I don't say "owwww" often enough for her liking, she will remind me. "Mama, OWWWWW!!!"

2. Like most (all?) two-year-olds, she has strong opinions about things. Most of the time she will do as we ask, but sometimes she'll dig her heels in about our truly ridiculous demands, such as putting on clothes so that we can go outside. The other night, while trying to wrestle her into her shoes, I said "Millie! Who is the boss here??" and wasn't really expecting a response, because I'm sure she doesn't know what "boss" means. But don't don't worry, she still responded. "Me! ME BOSS!" and then Matt and I failed at parenting because we laughed hysterically and totally rewarded her incorrect response but who cares, it was hilarious. "No, Millie. MOMMY is the boss and DADDY is the boss." "NO. Mill-mill boss!! ME BOSS!!"

It's probably true, but don't tell her.

So last night, while she was just happy and playing and not being stubborn about anything at the moment, I asked again. "Millie, who is the boss?" "Mama boss!" "Oh! Yes, Mama is the boss. Thanks!"

Five minutes later, she sees the TV remote and decides she wants it (the TV isn't on). I put it up out of her reach, and she looks me dead in the eye and says. "NO. Mill-mill boss dat. Me boss TB [TV]!!!" 

So anyway, glad we've established who is the boss of what around the house.

3. Matt was super sick for a week and a half (flu and pneumonia). It was really hard on Millie because she loves her daddy and always wants to be around him, but she couldn't when he was sick. Also, there was some serious injustice going on in our house due to Daddy's sickness.

Millie and I were eating at the table one night and Matt came through with a bottle of Gatorade. 

Millie: "What dat?" 
Me: "That's Daddy's juice."
Millie: "Want juice!! My juice!"
Me: "No, Mills, you only get juice when you are sick. You can drink your milk or water, okay?"
Millie: [slumps over dramatically, fake coughs, and moans.] "*cough cough* I sicccckkk, Mama. Need juice. I sick. *cough cough*"

(She didn't get juice. I am still the boss of juice.)

HAPPY!!!!!

If you're around Millie for more than about thirty seconds these days, you're bound to hear her proclaim "I HAPPY!!!!!" at the top of her lungs, accompanied by a huge grin that convinces you she is telling the truth.

Exhibit A: "I HAPPY, Mama!!" I believe this was in response to seeing Matt pull out the lawnmower. Don't nobody like tall grass, right?

I think it's adorable and brilliant that she's learning to label her feelings, and I'm glad that most of the time she chooses to be happy. Then again, I think the only other 'feelings' she really knows how to label are sad, sleepy ("seep-seep") and awake ("WAKE!"- can only be yelled). She definitely knows what sad is. Anytime we're looking at a book and she sees a character with tears on their face, she points to the tears and says in such a pathetic little voice "he sad, Mama. Awwwwww." and then she hugs the book. But my favorite-favorite happens maybe a few times a week...she has an eye that randomly tears up sometimes. I'm not sure why, but it's done it her whole life. It doesn't seem to bother her, and she never used to even notice, but now, anytime she feels that tear running down her face, she points to it and says "I SAD???!!!" in the most perplexed, confused, enthusiastic voice. It's beyond funny. Then I have to explain that sometimes we have tears because our eyes just make them, and we might not be sad at all. But she doesn't have time for that. "I sad. Awwww."

"Bikes, Mama? See cows? HAPPY!"

It's hard not to be happy when you're around her. She just radiates joy and excitement and it's truly contagious. Sure, she is a totally typical two-year-old and there are plenty of moments of sass and drama and disobedience, but she normally gets through those and back to "I HAPPY, Mama!" pretty quickly...so I just prefer to focus on the happy. 

Roasting marshmallows (or "beach balls," as she repeatedly called them (???)) blew her mind.

I'd kinda thought that by the time age two rolled around, most of her "firsts" would be done. And that's true, to some extent, but what I love is that really...they aren't. Almost every week I think of or realize something she hasn't done or seen yet- and not big giant "things," like traveling across the world, but small, everyday things- and I get so excited. Like roasting marshmallows. When I thought of it the other week, I realized that her mind would just be blown. I mean...a fire outside...she's never seen that. She got to help me gather sticks from the woods, which she thought was amazing. Then I pulled out the big ol' bag of marshmallows, and she basically lost her mind. I told her that we were going to put fire on the marshmallows to cook them before we ate them, and she had NO IDEA what was happening...but then when it happened...I mean. It was just the best. She's not one to shy away from trying new things, and for good reason: sometimes the new thing you try turns out to be a roasted marshmallow, and you are SO HAPPY, MAMA!!!

This is the best beach ball ever!

I just love thinking of fun things to show her and surprise her with. She literally shrieked with excitement the other day because I brought a popsicle outside for her to eat while she played. Like, shrieked. With excitement. She couldn't contain herself. 

A popsicle outside?!? WHAT IS THIS MAD, BEAUTIFUL WORLD??!

She gets excited for things other than food, too, for the record. When we finally (after she asked for two whole days!) got out the bikes to go ride over to visit the cows...there was shrieking. And jumping. Because COWS, MAMA!!!!!! I HAPPY!!!!

It's just fun having someone so easily impressed and excited to be around all the time, to be honest. She loves taking care of her babies, and she loves eating...well, on Saturday I used her kitchen and play food and pretended to feed the baby. MIND BLOWN. Can't stop feeding babies now! But also, she was getting irritated at the baby in the picture above. It's the kind whose eyes open/close when she is upright/laying down. Millie was extremely perturbed that the baby was "sleeping" while she was being fed. "WAKE, Baby! Open eyes! Eat eat!" As happy and excited as she is, Millie will never hesitate to let you know if you're not doing something right. Ha.

In conclusion...these are just days where it's really easy to be HAPPY. I am so thankful for that.

In post-conclusion, I would like to share two non-Millie toddler stories that are hilarious to me. You see, toddlers have the ability to tear you down just as easily as they can build you up. Let me 'splain.

Exhibit A: I am walking down the hallway to pick up Millie from her class. As I pass the doorway of an older classroom, a boy (maybe three-ish?) standing in the doorway looks at me, locks eyes with me, and loudly MOOOOOOs at me. You know, the cow sound. At me.

[commence me swearing I will start exercising and stop eating garbage all the time]

BUT THEN.

Exhibit B, a few weeks later: I am in line at Target. In front of me is another child from Millie's school and her mom. I know the child's name (let's call her Jane) and not the mom's name, as it usually goes, haha. But the mom and I chitchat while we wait to get rung up. After we've been chatting awhile, Jane stands up in the cart and her mom points to me and says "do you know who this is,  Jane?" Jane stares at me, wide eyed and silent for a minute. I know she recognizes me, because I talk to her on the playground almost every day, but I wait for a minute to see what she says. And boy am I glad I did.

In a voice of wonder, awe, and amazement, Jane stares at me and says "....Elsa?? ELSA?!!!!!"

Because if there's ANYONE I'm mistaken for, it's a blonde Disney ice princess (or whatever, still haven't seen Frozen, but I know an Ultimate Compliment from a Girl Toddler when I hear one). So you see: self-esteem restored. Thank you, toddler.

millie-isms: part III

THIS GIRL.

She is just beyond hilarious to me these days. Her language development and opinions?? TOO MUCH. I never want to forget this stuff.

1. She is a lover of all plants, animals, and nature...except bugs. And bees. When she's outside (which is 100% of the time if she has it her way), she likes to inspect every flower, touch every tree, and pet every animal. When she sees spent flower petals on the grass, she frantically cries "OH NO!!!" and picks them up and tries to replace them on the flower/tree they fell from. 

But when she sees any type of bug...or a speck of dirt or bark that vaguely resembles a bug...she sneers her nose and yells "WAY, BUG!!" while frantically waving her arms...go away, bug. If the bug doesn't immediately obey, she summons the nearest parent to go take care of the situation for her. "Mama!!! Bug!! Way!!"

Kitty cats do not need to "way." 

2. She loves her grandparents almost as much as flowers and animals, and possibly even more than her mommy and daddy. 

I know this because when my parents were here last weekend, my mom and I were giving Millie a bath. And after a few minutes of noticing that both Mommy AND Nannie were in the bathroom with her, she narrowed her eyes at me and decisively said "Mama. WAY."

And then she shooed me.

And I said "what?? Mills, you want Mommy to go away? You want Nannie to give you your bath?"

She nods.

"Mama. Way. Bye-bye."

Okay then. (P.S. I don't think my mom was nearly as broken up over this turn of events as I was. Ha!)

3. We had a birthday celebration for my dad while he was here, and we've had a little "Happy Birthday" sign thingy and the leftover party blowers sitting in our dining room ever since. Ever since then, approximately 3,928 times per meal, Millie will suddenly exclaim "Happy, happy!!" and make this big smile and move her head from side to side (which generally means she is "singing"). If Matt and I don't immediately begin singing the Happy Birthday song, she will yell "HAPPY!! HAPPY!!!" even more frantically while signing "more"...so we better snap to and start singing!

Happy girl.

4. I started rubbing Millie's back when I lay her down to sleep recently, and she immediately decided it was an integral part of her evening (or nap) routine. As soon as we finish saying our prayers, she says "back? back?" until I promise that I'll rub her back when she lays down. I rub it for a minute, and then she's calm and/or asleep, and I leave her room. If she happens to wake up in the middle of the night (once every week or 2), she will now accept a rubbed back in lieu of being held and/or insisting on sleeping in Mommy & Daddy's bed. So it's pretty nice.

But the other night, she was not tired (or way too tired) and just couldn't settle down at bedtime. I rubbed her back, she'd lay quietly for 2 minutes and then pop up and start screaming...I'd return and rub her back again, she'd repeat the whole thing again. We did a few rotations of this, and then I told her that this was the last time and that Mama wasn't going to come back in until she was asleep. I stuck to my word, but I was watching her on the video monitor as she stood in her crib yelling for me. After a few minutes of fruitless yelling, she laid back down...and then contorted her little arms backwards and attempted to rub her own back. YALLLLLLL. It was the sweetest, saddest thing I've ever seen. Poor Millsie, rubbing her own back. 

Luckily for her, it worked and she finally fell asleep. HA!

5. She can do three "chores" that are actually semi-helpful now! She unloads the silverware from the dishwasher, she feeds Lola (and screams "EAT EAT, NONAH!! EAT EAT, NONAH!!!" until the terrified dog finally gives in), and she can sort diaper laundry! She can separate the liners from the covers, which means all Matt and I have to do is stack the liners/covers before we put them away. I showed her how to do it a week or two ago, but a few nights ago I was surprised to find her doing it all by herself (without me asking/showing), AND she was stacking up the liners! 

Child labor for the win!

I think maybe she just really likes sorting things in general right now, because she also loves sorting all of her play dishes/silverware (putting all of the red ones together, the blue together, etc.) and also sorting her farm animals. It's precious.

But the cows cannot be sorted until she kisses their "boo boos"...aka udders. Ha. I told her that that is where the milk comes from, and she looked at me very seriously and then shook her head and said "BOO BOO" as she kissed it. So now I know.

millie-isms: part II

Our little bug has been under the weather for a few days. Nothing terrible, just generic fever+cough+snot. I hate when she feels bad, but I sure don't hate the extra snuggles.

Luckily she has felt good enough to continue being her normally hilarious self, which means I have content for my second installment of millie-isms: the hopefully endless list of the funny things she says (or does, as the case may be in this pre-verbal-fluency stage).

1. I've known for a few weeks that her favorite song is If You're Happy and You Know It (and also Itsy Bitsy Spider, and also Wheels on the Bus, and also Heads, Shoulders, Knees, and Toes. Just so the record is clear.). When we sing it, I normally just sing the usual verses- clap your hands, stomp your feet. But yesterday I decided to sub in some other actions at the end- and it turns out she can follow pretty well! So now when she's happy and she knows it, she can express it by patting her tummy, wiggling her ponytail, shaking her booty, sticking out her tongue, jumping up and down, and doing a flip (aka turning in a circle). I then further discovered that I can use this new game to my advantage, both to get her to do something she doesn't want to do, and to get her to STOP doing something that I don't want her to do.

Exhibit A: When I got home from work today, I said "Can you give Mommy a hug?" and she says "noooooo." So I sang "If you're happy and you know it, give Mommy a hug!" and she runs over and gives me a hug. WIN!

Exhibit B: She was fake-crying about something ridiculous. So I sang "if you're happy and you know it, stop crying!" and she stopped crying. EXTRA WIN.

2. Tonight I was reading her a story and she likes to point to and talk about things on all of the pages. We were looking at this page...



...and so I pointed to the slide and said "Millie, what do you say when you go on the slide?" and she replies "Weeeee!"

"Millie, what do you say on the swing?"

"Weeeeee!!"

Point to the picnic table. "Millie, what do you say when you eat a picnic?"

"MINE!"

Yup, that's about right.

so many options...

Millie is still a baby right now...obviously the cutest, sweetest, funniest baby ever, but still a baby. With each week that passes, though, I catch more glimpses of what she might be like as she grows out of her baby-ness. Her personality, her tendencies, her preferences...it's just so much fun watching those things develop. I love imagining what she might be like next month and next year and in five years. I can't wait to see how she unfolds.

One thing that I have trouble imagining, though, is what she'll look like. Not that it matters. It's just I can only imagine her looking one way: exactly how she does now. Which is perfect, of course. But for whatever reason, I just can't imagine what she'll look like as a toddler. And I think that the crux of the issue is that she doesn't have (much) hair. I can't draw a picture of Older Millie in my head because I don't know what she will look like with hair.

But who needs hair when you're this cute?

Lucky for me, there is the internet. And free time. And possibly mis-using a makeover webpage. But who cares, because the end result was lots of laughs in my house...and perhaps a slightly better idea of what lies ahead for Millie...or something.

Like, you know...maybe she'll be blonde!

Such luscious locks...this would be convenient because then we could easily discern whose long hair was responsible for clogging the drain/covering the floor/sticking to the shower wall. No confusion about blame!

But maybe she'd rather grow up to look just like her mom?

Haha, I know, I know. My hair never actually looks that good. If Millie got hers to look like that, I'd really have to step up my game. So maybe I'll encourage her to go another direction...

Aack...well, maybe not this direction, exactly. That looks painful and very non-cuddly. I want Future Millie to cuddle with me still, so I might discourage this look. Also, all those various colors would probably cost a fortune to maintain. Future Millie's gonna have to get a job if she expects a high-maintenance look like this.

Maybe Millie will truly follow in my footsteps and just phone it in with a bun most days. Thatta girl.

In conclusion...this is possibly the most ridiculous thing I've ever done, but I'm laughing so hard I can barely breathe, so it really seems worth it. 

And P.S.- Millie, just stay a bald baby as long as you can.