(mostly-olympics-themed) musings

To start with- thank you for all of the well wishes and happy birthdays you sent Millie's way on Friday! She doesn't yet have a concept of "blog friends," but I'm sure that on some level she felt the love. Hahaha. We had a wonderful 'family day' and did all of her favorite things.



Lucky for me, most of her favorite things involve food, so it was a pretty great day to be Millie's mommy. She had her two-year check-up today, and I discovered that she actually HASN'T gained a lot of weight...apparently I've just gotten weaker. Womp. Millie is hanging out at 29 lb 12 oz (84th percentile) and 35.6 inches long (91st percentile). So at least I was correct about one thing- she's super tall...more than 3 inches (and about a pound) gained since her last visit (in February).

Anyway, we (using the word "we" really generously here) did get Millie's playground built this weekend! Insert all the praise hands emoji right here.



It took Matt, his dad, his brother, and our friend the entire Saturday (about ten hours) (plus Matt and I worked on organizing the pieces for probably 3 hours the day before), but they did it! And then I generously screwed those two flags to the front, hence the reason I can say "we" built it with a semi-clear conscience. Obviously we've only had it for like five days, but so far I will give the swing set my stamp of approval. I mean, my #1 recommendation would be to get one from a company that will come to your house and assemble it for you...but if you're on a budget and can wrangle some helpers, this one turned out pretty great. And as you can see, Millie definitely approves!

And that leads us to our next important topic: the Olympics.

Without her swing set, how would Millie ever properly prepare for the 2020 games? She'll be six-ish then, right? Based on my observations, that seems to be about the average age of female gymnasts, so that's what we're aiming for.

No, in all seriousness, I've spent a lot of time thinking about which sport I would most want Millie to go to the Olympics for. I mean, obviously she is extremely gifted at probably every sport, so it's really up to me to just choose the one to really focus on. Gymnastics is most definitely my favorite one to watch, but over the last few Olympics (Olympicses?? haha), the diving events have crept up and are now rivaling gymnastics pretty hardcore. I get tired of the swimming events pretty fast, because...they just go on forever, they're not terribly interesting to me, blah blah blah. But synchronized diving? LOVE IT. Probably because it moves SO fast. Probably because jumping from a board or platform into a pool only takes about 2 seconds, even if you're doing 14 flips and twists on your way down. I just love the way that diving is as intricate and athletic and artistic as gymnastics, PLUS it's super fast, MINUS (I'm assuming) the humongous risk of debilitating injuries. It just seems like a win all the way around.

Oh yeah, PLUS...Millie really loves it. So I guess I can let her opinion count for something.

It's hard to see, but Millie is copying the (paused for instant replay) divers. When they show the slow-mo dive, she jumps up and spins around. Gifted.

But actually, I don't even think the diving is her favorite part of the Olympics. The water is.
And lest you wrongly assume, as I did, that when she excitedly screams "wah wah!!!" that she is referring to the (unbelievably gorgeous) Brazilian beach/ocean, or perhaps the pool...well, she's not. It took awhile to figure it out, but what she is ACTUALLY excited about is athletes drinking water on the sidelines. From water bottles. Every time they pan to someone on the sideline drinking water, Millie just can't even handle it. "WAH WAH!!!!!!!!" The thrill! Olympians! They're just like us!

Speaking of non-athletic-but-slightly-Olympics-related things...possibly one of my favorite parts of the Games is the previews they keep showing for the show This is Us. They piqued my interest with Milo Ventimiglia, but after a few days of seeing dozens of different trailers...I actually found myself tearing up at one of the previews last night. For a show I've never even seen! I don't even know the premise! I just know enough to know I'm already emotionally committed. So anyway, I'm excited about that.

I'm also EXTREMELY FREAKING EXCITED about Gilmore Girls: A Year in the Life being released on Black Friday!!!!! I mean, it goes without saying...but I just felt like I needed to say it. Finally...something to be thankful for on Thanksgiving. ;)

And on a final, unrelated note, I want to go on a cruise to Alaska. Anyone done this before? More specifically...anyone done this with a two-year-old before? I've been on several cruises and thought I would swear them off for life because of my seasickness. Plus, I discovered all-inclusive resorts, so like...who would want to cruise when you could have all the benefits with none of the drawbacks (like seasickness...or your ship losing power and floating aimlessly at sea while people poop in bags and what not)? But now I've got a hankerin' to check out Alaska (I don't know, maybe it's the 4,000 days of 100 degree weather that has me thinking crazy thoughts), and you can't really "check out Alaska" while sitting in an all-inclusive resort (or can you?). Cruising is supposedly one of the best ways to get to experience Alaska. And so I find myself researching and dreaming and scheming...but maybe this is the worst idea ever. Anyway, thoughts or experiences (good OR bad- just honest!) are welcome! 

And with that, I return to...oh wait, shocking...more swimming events!! Oooh wait, I forgot that there is one thing I particularly like about swimming events: Michael Phelps's baby. HOW CUTE IS THAT BABY??! Also, I love the Tula his mom wears him in. Major baby-carrier envy. So anyway. Look at me, finding the silver-ish lining. Ha. I guess Millie and I have that in common: an unconventional appreciation for things at the Olympics. Water bottles and Tulas. Good times!

weekend of the hibiscus

We kicked off the weekend by sharing some pretty exciting news. That was fun (slash terrifying)...and the rest of the weekend didn't disappoint, either.

In the space of a few days, all three of my hibiscus (hibiscuses? hibisci?) have BURST into bloom. I'm telling you, people. If you want a lot of gorgeous bang for your buck (and your climate supports them), get yourself a hibiscus or 10. 

I've forgotten the name of the variety of these two, but I love them. This is our third year with them. The blooms are HUGE and prolific. They only last about a day each (you can see the wilted ones that I haven't pinched off yet), but since there are so many, the net effect is that it is always beautiful once it starts blooming! And I'm serious, those blooms are roughly the size of a dinner plate.

This one is a Texas Star hibiscus- we planted it late last season, so this is the first time we've seen it bloom. The foliage is MUCH more sparse (and also got eaten UP by something...look at those poor leaves!!), but that doesn't seem to have bothered the blooms much! This morning was the first time we've seen the flowers- they're bright red and just lovely!!

On Saturday we embarked on a new adventure: stand up paddle boarding (apparently known as SUP to the cool kids who know what's up...wassup...HAHAHA I AM HILARIOUS). I'd been under the impression that this was a sport that only took place in oceans, and since Athens is short on oceans, I'd never considered giving it a try. A few weeks ago, though, some coworkers informed me that you can rent SUPs at a local lake/park (and by lake I mean "lake"...aka a glorified pond). I'm a big fan of any activity that can combine fun, exercise, the water, and getting tan.

We got to the park and signed up for our SUPs, but our reservation wouldn't be for another hour and a half. We decided to kill the time by taking a hike. This park has miles of shaded lakeside trails, so it was relatively comfortable conditions. I mean, we still sweated through our clothes in 4 minutes flat, but at least there wasn't direct sunlight blazing on us.

Three and a half miles of walking later, it was time to hit the lake. We had a quick tutorial on how to SUP and then we were on our way! It was surprisingly windy on the "lake," so we got quite the arm and back and core workout. It was really fun, but harder than I'd anticipated. I really don't know how you can do that in an ocean with waves!! The tiny "waves" created by canoes and fishing boats and wind were challenging enough! 

Despite the wind and water lapping on our feet, we still got super hot and sweaty. We stopped for a break to jump in the lake (RHYME!!!) and prove how brave we are. A lesser person would not risk their health in that water, I tell you...but I've already had giardia once (the best souvenir I got in Guatemala!! not...) and lived to tell the tale, so I think I'm pretty much invincible. And if you click on that link, I pity you. And I hope you're not eating right now.

Anyway, after jumping in, we decided to take our SUPing to the next level and do some yoga on our boards. We saw a class doing it...why not us? Sure, they had anchors for their SUPs and we didn't, but...I mean, we're really awesome at yoga because we've taken like 3 classes. Ha. We basically both 'mastered' a plank and a downward-facing dog and then cracked up at how dumb we looked and went back to just chilling. But it was pretty funny.

We paddled back and called our first SUP adventure a success. Then we hit the pool for the rest of the day, because after all that exercise...we really needed it.

It was a pretty great weekend and this week looks to be INSANE work-wise, so...I'm already ready for it to be next weekend. Yay.

i pulled off a surprise!

My dad's always been a 'surprise' person. You know...the kind of person that really likes planning and pulling off elaborate surprises for other people. Secretly planning something that he knows another person will love gives him great joy. The sneaky plotting. The carefully woven un-truths. The reveal. He's a surprise guy. 

I inherited a bit of that love, but to a lesser degree. Or maybe it's just that my love of treating myself seems to take precedence over planning fun things to surprise other people with. Oops. But on occasion, I really do love plotting a good surprise for someone else. But I'm bad at keeping it a secret. Here's a typical scenario in my house:

Me: MATT!!!!! Your birthday is coming up!!! We are going to do something SUPER AWESOME and soooo fun and you are going to DIE!!!! from how awesome it is!!!!!!!!!

Him: Cool, what is it?

Me: I'm not saying, it's a surprise!!! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Him: Oh, okay, cool!

Me: ...ummmm...don't you want to know what it is?

Him: You said it was a surprise....??

Me: It is!! But don't you like...want any clues? Aren't you curious? Do you even CARE THAT I'M PLANNING SOMETHING SO SO SO AMAZING?!?!?!

Him: Oh, yeah. Umm...so what are we doing?

Me: NOT TELLING!!!!

Him: (wanders off to play with the dog or something)

Me (ad nauseum, for the next however many weeks it is until the reveal): Are you excited about the surprise? Have you guessed what it is? I'm not telling, you know. But here's a clue: it is so awesome. 

Him: (ignoring me)

It's kind of sad, right? Right. Anyway.

A few weeks ago, my now-friend-but-then-stranger Emily sent me a Facebook message. I know of Emily (and am FB friends with her) because she's great friends with my blog friend/soulmate Colleen. Any friend of Colleen's is a friend of mine. Emily used to live in Colorado near Colleen, but recently moved to northwestern North Carolina. So anyway, Emily sends me a message.

Colleen is coming to visit me in a few weeks. I know she would LOVE to meet you in person, but I know it's pretty far from Athens to ____ (wherever she lives, I can't remember the name of the city). Any chance you could meet us in Asheville any of those days? I'd love to take her to Biltmore and I think it'd be a fun surprise!

Ummm....yes. Yes and yes. I gave a brief thought to the logistics: take the day off work. Drive a million hours (okay, three...each way) alone. GET TO MEET COLLEEN. Done and done.

So Friday was the day. I felt like my dad as the Surprise Day approached. Is there such a thing as Surpriser's High? I think that there is. Thinking about how awesome and exciting it was going to be when I 'revealed' myself to Colleen made me insanely giddy all week long. It is nothing short of a miracle that I didn't spoil my own surprise by sending Colleen obnoxious messages like I wonder who you might run into on your vacation??!?!?! Oh, how did I know you were going on vacation? Umm...good guess?? I hacked your credit card? GOTTAGO,BYE! Emily and I excitedly messaged and texted all week, imaging how it would all go down. And also scoping out the Asheville food scene WHICH IS MAGNIFICENT and planning our meals for the day. 

I got to Asheville around 11:15 a.m. on Friday. We were planning to meet at Tupelo Honey Cafe for brunch. We weren't sure how things would actually go down because we didn't know who would get there first, whether we'd have to wait for a table, or what. As it turned out, I beat them to the restaurant by about 5 minutes. I thought quick and decided to cop a very natural pose against the outside wall of the art gallery next door to the restaurant. I opened up my copy of Queen of Hearts, one of Colleen's novels, leaned back against the wall, and pretended to read. I sneakily texted Emily to let her know what I was doing...and to make sure that at least ONE of them noticed the girl in the green shirt reading Colleen's book, ha. 

Colleen fell right into the trap. I was wearing my sunglasses (and not actually reading), so I saw them when they turned the corner onto the block. I could hear them when Colleen spotted someone READING HER BOOK IN PUBLIC!!!!!! She stopped in her tracks and I could hear her freaking out that a total stranger on the other side of the country was reading HER BOOK...right next to the restaurant they were going to eat at!!!! She decided to approach the Queen-reading stranger and ask to take a picture with her. 

I took my sunglasses off and said "Hi, Colleen!!"

She looked like she had seen a ghost.

"Er...eri...ERIKA?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!!?" (I cannot emphasize the excitement and loudness enough here.)

"ERIKA?!??!?!?!" is more like it.

Emily and I cracked up at her bewilderment. I hugged her. She looked totally shocked and sputtered "oh my gosh...do you live here??! Is this close to Athens?" (bless her non-geographically inclined heart)

I had to inform her that this actually was not a coincidence and was actually a big surprise plotted by Emily, whom I high-fived. 

It was awesome.

The rest of the day was awesome, too. We ate, we went to Biltmore, we ate some more, we went to a wine tasting. We ate BBQ. And throughout the course of the day, approximately every 12 seconds, Colleen was once again overcome by the awesome surprisiness (real word, promise) of it all: I can't believe I'm _____ (eating, driving, sitting) with you!!!! and it was so, so fun.

I'll share more about Biltmore later (kind of small and tacky, in my opinion...), but hands-down the best part of the day was the realization that blog friends are even better as real life friends. That the people who serve as your sounding board and support system through messy and difficult years of life via email are even better listening ears and huggers in the flesh. It was so so so good for my heart to meet my blogging soul-sister in person.

And for a really good laugh, you should read Colleen's account of the day. It is hilarious and also a little hero-worshippy (with the hero being me!), which makes it even more hilarious. And also I'm a hero with the lilting drawl of Scarlett O'Hara...betcha didn't know that! (I didn't.) Also she describes meeting me (on the internet, pre-real life meeting) as like finding a seahorse in a swimming pool, a little bit of delightful magic.If you tell me you wouldn't travel across the universe and through time to hug the neck of someone who describes you like that, you're lying.

It was a super awesome day. And now I'm ready to plan my next big surprise! This could be addicting.

puzzling issues

First things first: It's Pi Day!!! Happppppy Pi Day!! In honor of one of my favorite days, I will share an important bit of information with you:

Did you know that 3.14% of sailors are pirates??

HAR! HAR! HAR!

You can thank the guy on NPR for that little funny. I wish I came up with on my own, but I didn't.

It's also my bestie Catherine's 30th birthday today. I will never cease to be jealous of her Pi Day Birthday.

In other life-changing news, Matt and I finally finished the puzzle we bought and started two weeks ago. If the fact that our idea of a good time is working on a 1000 piece jigsaw puzzle for two weeks is wrong, I don't wanna be right. We dominated that sucker.

When I've shown pictures or mentioned working on/completing the puzzle during the last few weeks, several people commented that they didn't know we did puzzles.

YES. It's this whole secret life I've been hiding from everyone. Matt and Erika: PUZZLE MASTERS. We pretend to watch TV or garden, but really we secretly hoard puzzles and like...enter puzzle-doing-tournaments. Puzzling Tournaments. Yep. You thought we had a desolate nursery lurking in the back of the house-- really it's our Shrine of Completed Puzzles. We frame them and put them on the walls.

Or not. Although I've dabbled in puzzles in my past (like...Mom might receive one for Christmas and we'd all work on it for the rest of Christmas break or something, back when I was living at home), actually purchasing one and choosing to set it up on a card table in my own living room for half a month is a new thing. When we were in Texas last month, my Nana had a puzzle going and I would sit with her and work on it and I thought it was such a nice thing to do...we could chat, our hands were occupied...it was lovely. So that inspired me that Matt and I should do that, too. And it was delightful! I was happy to find a puzzle that was more intriguing (to me) than a random landscape or watercolor painting. This one was magazine and newspaper headlines from 2001-2011, so it was fun because I've seen many of them in real life. Plus you could overhear Matt and I saying things like hey, if you see Obama's head, pass it my way and dangit I KNOW I had Brad Pitt's lips, but now I can't find them. You just don't get commentary like that over a mountain landscape.

Anyway. Now the puzzle is done and I'm not quite sure where we go from here. We definitely need to admire our hard work for a few days before we break it down. Do we move directly into starting another one? Do we take a puzzle break? Should we find someone to loan us a puzzle (or swap this one) because like...we really don't need to accumulate a bunch of puzzles. I mean, is it the kind of thing where in a few years we'll want to redo this one? So many puzzling questions. So few answers. Truly overwhelming.

But I'd rather be overwhelmed with my puzzle issues than my other favorite (?) current rabbithole: conspiracy theories about the missing Malaysian Airlines flight. Holy crap, people. With every day that passes, it gets weirder. I can't stop reading everything I can find. And when even the reports from the mainstream media read like the pondering of a paranoid person...it's just insane. What on earth happened?? Is it weird that at this point I'm sort of hoping it was 'just' a plane crash?? That's horrible. Obviously I don't wish that 239 innocent people were killed in a horrific wreck. But like...plane crashes are a known evil. They're awful. Tragic. But somehow...if it really were just a 'normal' wreck caused by some catastrophic engine thing or something...that seems better than an unknown evil. It's just too hard to imagine that this could be the result of someone's (or some government's??!) plan. I mean, if everyone aboard is dead. Now if they're all safe somewhere, I take back my wishing it were a regular crash. But it seems kind of unlikely at this point. And if they are alive...something makes me think they're not in a good situation. Are they all hostages? Holy cow. I just don't know. Ugh. I'll stop rambling. I clearly need to stop Googling "Malaysian flight disappearance theories." Maybe tomorrow. 

So! This weekend I have big plans to pay bills, see my friend's community theater's production of Hello Dolly, sleep in, get my toes done, and do some circuit training. And hopefully stop Googling scary things. Oh, and drink more water. And work in my secret dungeon puzzle lair. Have a great weekend!

snow, snow, go away....

Day 3 of Snowpocalypse.

I don't know how you people up north deal with this. I'm totally over it. I can't wait for it to be in the 70s next week. 

I've come to the eye-opening conclusion that I'm not a very productive Snow Day person. In other words, I've accomplished absolutely NOTHING and wasted a WHOLE lot of time during our three (and counting) days of being homebound. I see people's stories of Snowy Productivity and accomplishments this week and I totally cannot relate. And we've had power the whole time, so I don't even have a good excuse.

Things I Could Have/Should Have Done This Week:

1. Our taxes.
2. Fold the clothes that have been in the dryer since Monday.
3. Balance the checkbook and pay bills.
4. Exercise (with a DVD since the gym is closed and even if it wasn't, we couldn't get there).
5. Finally sort through the Depressingly Empty Nursery that has been shut up like a tomb since November. Figure out what to do with all the (probably expired or expiring soon) formula. Give people back the stuff they lent us.
6. Work on writing the requested (and promised) lipstick tutorial blog I've been procrastinating.

Things I Did Do This Week:

1. Finish Season 2 of Revenge. Sign up for Hulu Plus (which I hate so far-- commercials??!?!) and start Season 3.
2. Make and drink lots of coffee.
3. Go on Snow Walks each day.
4. Have a snowball fight with Mattie.
5. Play Scrabble (on a board, not my phone!).
6. Watch ALL THE OLYMPICS.
6a. Including curling. I watched for like 15 minutes and tried really hard to understand what was happening and it's JUST NOT COMPUTING, GUYS. I would rather watch paint dry.
7. Stay extremely current on everything happening on Facebook and Twitter.
8. Visit my next door neighbors and play with their litter of 6-week-old puppies.
9. Pre-plan all the bitter things I'm going to say about the inevitable baby boom that will occur 9 months after this snowstorm.

Well, when I list it all out like that, I actually look pretty productive. Just not in ways that are actually important, ha. Oh well. I still have at least another day to knock out the first list. As soon as I finish Revenge Season 3, that is.

a snow fashion tutorial

Greetings and welcome to Day 2 of Georgia Snowpocalypse 2.0!! Other cutesy names people and the media are throwing around to describe this rare phenomenon of snow/ice/cold precipitation in Georgia (for the unprecendented SECOND TIME IN ONE YEAR!!!!): Icelanta, Atlantarctica, Snowmeggedon. I kind of like all of them. I also kind of love that in an effort to not look/be as dumb as we were last month, we are being SO EXTREMELY OVERLY CAREFUL AND PREVENTATIVE during this storm...which means that we're practically under martial law with orders to NOT LEAVE YOUR HOUSE NO MATTER WHAT. I think if you were to dare to drive your car on a road, you'd probably be shot. Duly noted. Happy to stay home and watch ungodly amounts of Netflix and Olympics. Well, I'll be happy as long as the power stays on...which it has, so far. But we expect it to go out at any moment, so it's this weird situation of trying to enjoy it while it's here, but preparing to live without it.

Anyway. Matt was getting a little stir-crazy this morning and proposed that we go on an adventure. Basically that means we went on a walk around our neighborhood, but when there's snow and ice making the roads treacherous, suddenly it becomes an adventure. Before we departed on our snowstravaganza there was a Really Important Moment that happened in my closet. Remember my huge conflict about getting rid of my Timberlands? You guys had a LOT of opinions about that situation and I ultimately ended up pulling them out of the donation pile and hoarding them for a bit longer.

Well, guess who got called up to the plate today? 

That's right, ladies. Coming out of retirement for Snowpocalypse 2.0....the TIMBERLANDS!!!!!

It was a big moment for them. And me.

Since it's now snowed twice (and was super super cold another day), I am obviously an expert on dressing for the cold, as you can see. I'm sure you'll all be wanting to copy my snazzy outfit, so here are the details, from top to bottom:

-really old red hat
-fleece scarf
-sunglasses (to keep sleet from your eyeballs)
-long sleeved t-shirt under a fleece under a raincoat (with hood pulled up when necessary)
-fleece leggings under regular running leggings
-Smartwool socks (these are key)
-15 year old Timberlands
-gloves

This outfit was surprisingly effective for our 25 minutes in the elements. It was about 26 degrees outside at the time and just lightly sleeting, which I know is basically summer weather to all of you Canadians and Midwesterners.

As we walked, Matt and I were discussing how now we feel like we can really relate to all the Winter Olympians. Or at least to how it feels to stand in the snow in the cold...which is basically all they do, right?

Lola was pretty jazzed about our snowventure. She liked running and tugging on the leash, which would cause us to drag behind her since we couldn't get a foothold on the ice-covered-snow. It was like she was a boat and we were the skiers! Pretty fun. 

Eventually she discovered the joy of just running in circles around me. It was hilarious. It would have been less hilarious if I'd fallen down, but luckily that didn't happen.



So obviously Snow Day 2 is off to a great start. It looks like we'll have at least another half-day off tomorrow...so since I've been off since last Thursday (for our Texas trip), basically I don't remember what it's like to go to work. Or put on clothes that remotely match. Oh well.

keeper of the knowledge

Do you ever feel like you're the only one that knows something really important?

Like...really important?

And the knowledge just sits inside you, deep in your soul...and you wish everyone knew...but no one does? Until finally one day you decide to just up and UNLEASH THE KNOWLEDGE on everyone, come what may?

I bet it would be awesome if that Deep and Burning Knowledge were about something really awesome or important. In my case, it almost never is. So sorry if I got your hopes up or anything. I just have three really semi-ordinary, unrelated, and probably-only-important-to-me things to share.

THING #1:
  **Apostrophes NEVER EVER make a word plural.**

I feel like the world has been repeatedly assaulting my eyes with this heinous error lately. Sometimes I can let it go. Sometimes it makes me want to stab my eyes repeatedly. This week I've been in stab-mode. So let me just clear this tiny grammatical detail up for you: YOU NEVER NEED AN APOSTROPHE TO MAKE A WORD PLURAL. It's never gonna be two adorable bunnie's or getting drinks with your best friend's. We're not sad on Monday's because Bachelorette is over, ladies. We're sad on Mondays. I almost just went into a related-but-trickier sub-rant regarding pluralizing names that end in -es, but decided to skip it JUST SO THAT maybe this original point can sink in a little deeper. Please. Make a commitment now-- TODAY!!-- to never ever succumb to the temptation to throw in an apostrophe in hopes of making a word plural. It doesn't help, and no apostrophe deserves that. So please. And thank you.

THING #2:
**You do not want to get attacked by a shark in Cancun.**

I know. Most likely your greatest Cancun fantasies involve getting attacked by sharks, but let me be the first to tell you: YOU DON'T WANT THAT TO HAPPEN. Trust me. It's Shark Week, and I've been taking notes. Note #1- You can run a lot longer on a treadmill when there are shark shows on. Note #2- DO NOT GET ATTACKED BY A SHARK IN CANCUN. You may recall that I'm going to Cancun in the near future. Perhaps that is why this particular story stuck out to me. But listen up. I'm serious. This poor lady heard guys shouting frantically at her from jet skis (NOT jet ski's, please note!) but they were yelling in Spanish, which she didn't understand, AND THEN SHE GOT ATTACKED BY A SHARK. And like that wasn't bad enough, then when the jet ski guys jetted her up to the shore, THEN IT TOOK 45 MINUTES FOR AN AMBULANCE TO GET THERE. Like...party foul, Cancun. NOT COOL. And THEN the surgeons (saved her life BUT) did a super crappy job replacing chunks of skin and stuff and then she got flown back home to Canada and went to a doctor there and THEN THEY HAD TO AMPUTATE ANYWAY!!! So like she was on an airplane with her leg rotting off. AWESOME. So I think the moral of this story is that a) you should at least learn a few key words like 'shark' and 'stop' and 'help' in Spanish (which I do, so I'd like to think I'm one step ahead here), and b) you should not get attacked by a shark in Cancun.

My deepest apologies for the abundance of all-caps yelling in the previous paragraph, but I feel really strongly about this.

And finally:

THING #3:
**Swimming pools are hiding everywhere.**

What? Swimming pools? Hiding? How could you hide a swimming pool?

All legitimate questions. All things I myself would have questioned. Until I went swimming in a hidden swimming pool on Tuesday.

   
This particular swimming pool happens to be hiding in the shared basement of two very ordinary, old, seemingly-normal University buildings- Marine Science and Dance. Right in the middle of UGA campus. Spittin' distance from a dorm I lived in for a year. And NEVER EVER did I have a clue that there was a giant pool in the basement of it! And apparently neither did anyone I've talked to about it, either. Only the employees of the building know, which is how I came to discover it. Two of my friends work in that building now, and apparently the employees are let in on the secret-- and given keys and permission to swim as they like. They were nice enough to invite us over for a post-work swim. I swear, to FIND the pool? It was like living some epic adventure movie, like Lord of the Rings or something. Not that I've ever stayed awake through that entire movie, but I'm pretty sure it involved a long journey to find something. So it is with this pool. Down a twisty hallway, hang a right and go down the rickety stairs...go through the 1920s-esque 'locker room', AND THROUGH THE SHOWERS THEMSELVES, and then there is a locked door. Get your employee-friend to open the locked door, and danged if there isn't a giant indoor pool inside what you probably assumed would be a roachy utility closet.  Craziest thing ever.

It was like walking through a time portal. I have no idea when this pool was built, but it reminded me of the pool in the Biltmore House...have you ever been there? I haven't been since 4th grade, but I remember that pool like it was yesterday, and this reminded me of it. And I just spent 10 minutes Googling and could not find a THING about this pool, which proves exactly how hidden and secret it really is. The locker room and lockers must have been built at the same time as the pool...I took a shot of Matt in there:

  While I am normally not a fan of places that are creepy, old, and probably have asbestos...I couldn't help but be excited about this awesome secret pool. I think it even made swimming laps a less miserable experience! I just can't believe that in all my time in Athens, I had never heard of this pool before my friends started working there. And now that I know about it? It makes me wonder how many more hidden pools there are that I don't know about. They could be anywhere! My eyes have been opened to this whole new world of secret pools, people...and now yours are, too. 

Secret pools.

Shark attacks in Cancun.

The most offensive way to abuse an apostrophe.

Now YOU are the keeper of this knowledge. Use it well, friends.

not as exciting as you'd think

I am so tired.

My brain is 100% empty and devoid of any interesting thoughts. I think two nights of terrible sleep + last night's 'MOST DRAMATIC EVER' Bachelorette episode, which actually was extremely dramatic and emotionally draining, are taking their toll. I apologize if I'm not up to my normal extremely high level of entertainment (ha) today.

Yesterday my friend Diana emailed me this screenshot of an ad she noticed on my blog:

Feel free to notice the time of this screenshot and comment about how strange Diana is that she CHOOSES to wake up at like 4 a.m. to go running, be productive, and read blogs before work.

Her email simply said "Your blog was advertising this. Thoughts?"

Yes, I have thoughts. All The Thoughts. Of course.

What the heck is wrong with the internet ad robots? They have really been off their game lately!

I spent some time pondering the meaning of this ad. This is what sleep-deprived and delirious people do, apparently. Bodies? Transferable? Space?

This obviously is some sort of alien body-transferring thing. They take your bodies back to their own planets? How did aliens manage to get a Google ad? Do they have human advertising executives that they work with? Why don't they speak better English? Why did they start their body transfers in 1972? Did it coincide with the 1972 Summer Olympic Games in Munich? So many questions.

At any rate, I eventually decided it was worth checking out the webpage. If these body-transferring shenanigans are being advertised right under my own nose, I better at least know what's up.

Turns out it's super boring.

Something to do with pickup truck camper top things ("service bodies"). Boring boring boring. What a letdown. No aliens. No bodies being transferred. Ridiculous.

And thus concludes the most anticlimactic story ever. Another alien story that didn't pan out. One of these days it will, though. And on that day, I will shout in my husband's face "BOOYAH!!! I TOLD YOU SO!!!!!"...because if there's anything we disagree about, it's the existence of body-transferring aliens. I can't wait to win that argument.

Oh look, I'm reaching new lows here. Help. Send Starbucks!!

the most exciting holiday ever

Well, I knew my Fourth was going to be uneventful. I just had no idea how extremely, boringly uneventful I could possibly be. I think I took my boringness to new levels. It would be almost sad, except I'm actually kind of impressed with myself. I mean, if you're going to be boring, you may as well be the most boring person ever in the history of the world, right?

We kicked the day off by sleeping til after 11. Well, to be entirely truthful, I did wake up at 8:30, get a heating pad, and then go back to bed. But more or less...in bed til 11. Then I spent the rest of the day alternating between laying in bed (reading or mindlessly surfing the interwebz) and doing random 'spring cleaning' projects. I like how Matt always refers to a semi-deep cleaning or organization project as 'spring cleaning,' regardless of the time of year. It seems so...optimistic. Or something. 

So here's some of my super exciting accomplishments. And since it was Independence Day, I think I shall name them accordingly.

I celebrated my independence from an increasingly cluttered, unruly, and hard-to-find-anything bathroom cabinet:

We have a pitiful amount of storage space in our master bath (this is 'mine' and Matt has the same amount of space under his sink-- that's it! No linen closet, no drawers...just...this), and I have an intense love affair with beauty stores and products, which doesn't always work out so well. Luckily I was able to restore some order and implement some new systems down there while only re-using stuff (boxes, tubs, etc.) we already had around the house. I think it will be much more functional now! Plus, seeing me doing this inspired Matt to do the same under HIS sink, so...basically our bathroom cabinets are winning at life now.

In the course of cleaning out my cabinet, I celebrated my freedom from old, dried-out, no-longer-in-favor makeup and products and pared everything down to what would fit in this box (not counting the three pallets to the right that obviously would not fit in the box) (and all of the brushes are happily organized in a cup now, too)!

I don't even want to discuss how old some of my makeup was. Or why I am a hoarder and would be hanging on to some old dried up mascara from like '03. Let's just be happy that it's all gone now. Obviously this makeup box does not include any nail products; those are all housed separately in an entire drawer of the drawer-organizer-thingy under the cabinet. But I went through the nail polishes, too, and tossed some that had been lurking since like...college.

After all of this organizing and product-purging, I celebrated my right to lay on the bed and read a few chapters of my book. And it was glorious. The book AND the laying on the bed, watching it rain. Glorious.

Late in the day, after stir-crazy-Mattie convinced me to at least go on a walk around the neighborhood, I had one final celebration: my freedom to wear clean, non-wrinkly clothes. Wah wah wah.

I know. You thought I was exaggerating how boring my day was, but now you know the truth. I was bored enough to take pictures of my laundry. How you like them apples?

The Fourth of July would not be complete without idiots  neighbors shooting off fireworks (in the rain) all night. Here's how our family felt about that situation:

Lola is not such a fan of fireworks. But she's a big fan of being in a cocoon on the couch, snuggled so close to me that we have to call her Womb Doggie (the name she acquired when I was recovering from surgery and spent all of my time on the couch and she would snuggle up SOCLOSETOME that it was like she was trying to crawl inside me...okay, so maybe this story sounds weird, but when she does that now we call her Womb Doggie because apparently she wants to get in my womb? Whatever. Don't judge me).

Basically the most exciting thing about my 'holiday' (Wednesday night, actually) was that I watched two episodes of Naked and Afraid, the new 'ultimate survivor' show on Discovery. I watched it fully expecting to just laugh my head off and act insulted about how we've stooped to new lows as a society, making boring survivor-type shows more voyeuristic what with the unnecessary nudity and all...but dude, I was wrong. That show was pretty awesome. Being dropped naked into a scary and dangerous place actually does make survival even tougher...it's not just gratuitous. (For instance, since they had no shoes, when they walked through an unavoidable field with thorns and briars, their feet got all jacked up...and then infected...and yeah, that wouldn't have happened if they had shoes on) On one of the episodes, one of the first things they did was weave/fashion some Adam & Eve-type clothes, so that was pretty awesome and then there wasn't even that much nudity. But at any rate, watching a few episodes made me extremely thankful for my food, house, and excess of everything for the rest of the holiday. Also, for the record, I would never ever survive any of those situations. NEVER. Anyone else watching that show? The next new episode is on Sunday. I'm definitely tuning in.

Right so...that was my extremely patriotic and celebratory Fourth of July. Right. I didn't even wear red, white, and blue...so basically I failed at being an American. Maybe next year I'll do better.

For now, I'm at work...which feels really weird...the whole random Thursday off in the middle of a work week? I guess most people took today off as well, but I have barely any vacation days or sick days, so...I didn't. And now I'm here and the AC isn't working so it's about 90 degrees in my office, and I'm just trying to pretend I'm on Naked & Afraid (only not naked...don't worry) and I'm just gonna have to survive this travesty...until 5:00 (or the air gets fixed, whichever comes first). Wish me luck!

six years

Six years ago we made our vows.

Each year since, I've taken a minute (or sixty) to write down my thoughts about that day, or the previous year, or life and love and marriage and hope in general. Today won't be any different. Except I couldn't figure out what to write about. I didn't want to just repeat stuff I've already said. And last year...well, I said it really well. I half wanted to just say 'DITTO TO LAST YEAR' and call it a day. So despite thinking (and mildly stressing) about it all week, as of yesterday morning, I still hadn't figured out what to write about.

So we went on our little 'anniversary adventure' late yesterday morning. We'd decided to check out Treetop Quest, a 'treetop obstacle course and ziplining' place in a nearby city. I don't know what sparked our desire to go spend a day doing this, other than the fact that we're on a 'do fun stuff' kick lately, and this seemed like it might be fun.

We took a quick class where they got us all strapped up and showed us how to use the various pieces of our harnesses/caribiners/things I don't remember the names of, and then we were off to conquer the 5 different courses on our own. Don't worry, there were always staff people nearby to offer assistance (or climb up and rescue you, as we saw one girl take 'em up on).

 I'm not necessarily scared of heights, but I have a pretty intense lifelong fear of bridges and a healthy desire to not plunge to my death from any height, so I wouldn't say that this whole thing was exactly in my comfort zone. I do, however, have a deep and burning desire to be a badass (see: trying to do a triathlon), so I was determined to complete all five courses, panic attacks, weak upper body, and tears be damned. 

And here's what I realized as I bravely fought my way through the course (you knew a metaphor was coming, right?): this is just like marriage.

It sounded like it would be fun. There were a lot of great opportunities for photos. And the first few things were fun and easy. But then there were hard things. And then it turns out that- heck, I'm scared of normal, regular bridges- the kind with 4 lanes and twenty tons of concrete holding you up- but now I'm supposed to cross a 'bridge' made out of 4-inch squares of wood suspended 70 feet above the ground, and that is too hard for me. That isn't fun. And so I cried, and I wanted to quit because I don't like this part. But then I dried my tears and crossed that bridge. With shaking legs, and no shortage of fear, and no attempt at looking brave...I did it. And then you get to a zipline, which is relatively easy and lots of fun...but then the next thing is some other sadistic bridge-type thing that is not fun. And now my legs are tired and I'm sweaty and if I weren't stuck in a tree 80 feet in the air, I really might have just said 'peace!' and sat that one out...but I wanted to finish the course. I said I was going to do it. I know I can do it. I know the equipment is safe, my harness is secure, and so instead of submitting to what I felt like, I did what I knew I could. 

And you know what? When you complete a section that was fun or relatively simple, you feel pretty good. I mean, it's fun to have just done something fun. But when you complete a section that was more than you thought you could handle? A section that you really thought you might die on? You feel incredible. You high-five your husband and you fist pump and you feel a little bit better about tackling whatever thing comes next.

It's just like marriage. It's just like life. There were sections of the course that were really hard and scary. There were sections that were super fun and had you flying through the trees. You never knew which section was coming next until you got there, and by the time you were there it was time to do it. Maybe it would have been nice if the whole course had been easy. I mean, I could have stuck with the children's course the whole time...the one where no obstacle or zipline is higher than about 6 feet? Where my feet would have drug the ground the whole time? There'd have been no fear of heights there. No fear of plunging 80 feet to paralysis or death. No sketchy bridges. But it also wouldn't have really been fun. There'd have been no exhilarating flying over the treetops. No triumphant high-fiving when you conquer something hard. No opportunity to cheer on your partner, to offer tips to passing strangers, to ask advice from the freakishly strong and fearless 8-year-old following you around. 

The last six years have had more than their fair share of obstacles. I've been stuck on a swinging rope bridge, living out my greatest fear, with nothing but a couple cables keeping me from falling off. I've envied other people on the lower, easier courses. The people who somehow found the course with all ziplines and no bridge obstacles. And yet we keep climbing. We keep going and going, and there are sections of absolute joy and exhilaration, and there are sections of fear and trembling. But when it's over, and we look back at what we've been through and accomplished (or survived) in a week, or a season, or several years...it is worth it. Somehow the memories of the hard times fade a bit, while the pride in overcoming obstacles and the happy memories of the fun sections stays in the forefront of your mind, and you say it was awesome. I can't wait to do it again. You HAVE to do it. 

Our six years haven't always been easy ones. But they have been worth it. And we are getting stronger, and our marriage is getting stronger, and now I've been on the swinging rope bridge enough times to know that I may not always enjoy it, but I can do it. 

Happy Anniversary to you, Mattie. You are the best partner I could have ever picked and I am thankful every single minute that you still choose me.

Anniversary Meditations from Previous Years: Five Years, Four Years, Three Years, Two Years, One Year.

For your bonus viewing pleasure, here are a few videos we took on some of the obstacles. (And sorry they're not aligned correctly...Blogger is being a pain in the butt.)

This one is me on my most-hated obstacle, a very high swinging log bridge. There's a separate video of me getting on and getting off the very first step about 3 times, freaking out, and trying to quit. Then I just did it. Like a boss.

Matt on a similar obstacle. I hated this one, too.

 This one was really fun, but TOUGH! Had to swing (like Tarzan) and then land and grab onto the net and climb up a ways, then sideways over to the landing. Climbing nets is HARD!!!

 This one I thought I would HATE. I'd seen other people really struggle with it, and it falls in the whole 'swinging bridge' category of things in my mind...but actually I ended up doing really well and conquering it pretty quickly! It was a pleasant surprise.

our weekend 'staycation'

It was a gorgeous weekend in Georgia...hot, but not unbearably so...and it actually managed to stop raining for a few days, so we tried to make the most of the weekend and spend as little of it indoors as possible. For as much as I don't like to sweat,  I sure do love spending all day long out in the sun on the weekends. Which means that by all accounts, this was a great weekend.

Saturday morning we rolled out of bed in a timely fashion and made our way out to The Sandbar to spend the afternoon kayaking down the Broad River. We've kayaked the Broad each of the last two summers, but both of those years we were in the midst of a deep and long-lasting, Code Red, Level 10 (ok, I made that part up) drought. Meaning that there was barely any water in the river and we basically had to walk 5 miles dragging our kayaks behind us. It took forever and it was a whole lot of exercise. But THIS YEAR, thanks to days upon weeks of rain, we are officially OUT of the drought and the rivers are FULL! Everyone I know who's gone kayaking this year raves about how awesome it is getting to actually FLOAT the whole time, and how it's way more fun that previous years. So obviously we needed to get on it, and the time is now...before the rivers dry up again! Don't delay...row today. Something like that.

You know how sometimes smart people do dumb things? Well here's Exhibit A from my personal experience this weekend. I decided to take my iPhone kayaking with me. In a (non-waterproof) Otter Box. But I put it in a Ziplock bag for protection, which is obviously brilliant. Or...not. I don't know what I was thinking. I definitely wasn't thinking about GOING OVER RAPIDS and GETTING DUMPED OUT OF MY KAYAK...along with all of my possessions. I need pictures! I'll take my phone!...was about all I thought of. Not smart. Big shout-out to God for keeping me (and my phone) safely in the kayak the whole trip. Please try to picture me each time I approached a rocky section/rapid, wrapping my Ziplock-bagged phone in my tank top, squeezing them between my knees, praying that my knees didn't flail apart as I tried to keep my balance over the rapid...sheesh. I think it took a few years off my life, but at least I got some fun pictures. And I won't be repeating that idiot move in the future. Trust me. 

Other than phone-related stress, it was a wonderful and fairly easy ride down the river. We stopped to swim a bit and watched lots of turtles getting suntans. Afterwards we were starving, so we stopped for Mexican at a hole-in-the-wall and had some amazing puposas (me) and tortas (Matt). I swear that Athens (and surrounding small towns) has some of the best Mexican (and Salvadorean) food in the world. And I've actually been to Mexico a few times, so obviously I'm an expert. Boom.

After arriving home, we decided to take advantage of the nice weather and fact that we were already sweaty and gross and knock out some other sweaty/gross chores: mowing and washing our car. It was a very productive afternoon.

Sunday after church we decided it was time to make a big purchase we've been debating all summer: the inflatable pool for the backyard. Since all of you were wholeheartedly supporting this purchase, it made it pretty easy to convince Matt that it was a great idea. And then we found a $22 pool at Aldi and it was a done deal. We even sprung $5 to get a pump to blow it up. I know...we're high rollers.

After a tasty lunch on the grill, we spent a relaxing afternoon in our backyard resort.

Pretty much the only thing missing was a waiter bringing us drinks. Oh, and water over 6 inches deep. See, our preferred location (see how nice it looks from my bedroom window?) wasn't exactly what you'd call level. I figured this would not be a problem. I didn't mind if it was deeper on one side. We'll call it the 'deep end' and be done with it! Unfortunately, that's not how it works in the world of inflatable pools. What happens is the 'deep end' caves in and your water dumps out everywhere. Who knew? So after enjoying the pool for about 30 minutes in that location, we had to empty it, move it to the far back of the yard where it's a bit more level (and way more visible from the road/neighbors' houses) and start over.

It's not in as pretty an area now, but at least the sides aren't collapsing, so I guess we'll call it a win. After we were done swimming (hahaha) we decided to fashion a pool cover out of a plastic dropcloth, Ziplock baggies filled with rocks, and duct tape. It was pretty brilliant, if you ask me, and very effective. So now our pool won't get grass, leaves, and bugs in it. And it'll be all ready for us to cool off in after work (and working out)! I can hardly wait to embark on this new life of leisure...a home swimming pool...whatever luxuries will befall us next??!

We patted ourselves on the back for being 'adventurous' two weekends in a row (last weekend biking the Augusta Canal)...it makes you feel like you didn't totally waste your days, you know? Matt called our weekend a 'staycation,' since we did fun and relaxing things while basically staying at home. I thought that was a pretty fair assessment! We're looking forward to ANOTHER fun outdoor adventure next weekend for our anniversary!! Apparently we're hitting up every single fun outdoor thing in the state...if you're familiar with Georgia outdoor attractions (with an emphasis on FUN and SEMI-ACTIVE), feel free to recommend any we're missing!! Have a happy Monday!