Wanna know what caused this horrid display of weakness? It's probably not what you're thinking.
My squash and zucchini plants are probably not going to make it. Year number THREE of succumbing to the squash bugs despite my constant vigilance, my ceaseless checking, my by-the-books application of PESTICIDE, which I am totally opposed to doing but did anyway because NOTHING ELSE WORKED...and despite ALL OF THAT (to say nothing of the hours I've spent pruning, tending, talking to, and photographing)...those bastard bugs have the nerve to come KILL MY BABIES? After I've only had the pleasure of harvesting two zucchini and two squash??! I completely lost it. LOST IT. SOBBING IN THE VEGETABLE GARDEN.
Apparently my emotional stability is easily unhinged. But seriously, junk like this just makes me really mad. Like...don't I have enough crappy stuff going on in my life? Seriously, God?? Seriously, you couldn't just let my stupid squash plants live? That was too much to ask? Yeah, cool, whatever.
I managed to self-medicate and stop hating life after a few hours. Here's what helped:
1. This song.
2. Ryan Gosling "Hey Girl" memes.
No seriously, these are my most favorite thing ever right now. Especially the teaching and crafting-themed ones. I laugh so hard I cry sometimes. Thank you to everyone in the world who think of making these things, and also to the people who pin and repin them so that I can find them. I owe you my sanity. A few faves:
OK I'll stop now, but I seriously feel happier with every one I find. So thanks, Cascada and Ryan Gosling. You might not be able to save my veggies, but at least you made me smile.