Thursday, June 14, 2012

church and vampires: the true stories

Today at lunch, two of my female students (5 year olds) told me that they see each other at misa. Unfamiliar with the word, I asked them what misa meant. "Church," they replied. "Oh!" I replied, "I go to church, too! But I don't see you there. What do you do at your church?"

One of them proudly proclaims: "We get lollipops!"

"Lollipops, eh? Is that all you do at church? Tell me what else you do," I asked.

She rolls her eyes upward.

"Well, first, when we go there...we sing the song of the Father." (Note: most of my students, since Spanish is their first language, tend to mix up the order of their words, especially adjectives and descriptors: the car of my mom, the shirt red, etc. I find it completely precious and find myself doing it myself, even though I'm fairly fluent in English...)

"...and then we sit down, and then the Father talks." Long pause. "And...then he keeps talking." Big exhale. "And then the Father, he talks some more." More dramatic pausing. "And then we sing the song. And then the Father...he talk some more."


"And then we get a lollipop."

After I pulled myself back up off the floor and got my laughter under control, I asked, " you like going to misa?"

She looks at me like I'm the dumbest person on Earth. "Ummm...nooo?" and laughs. In my face.


"Because...the Father, he just talks too much. And then we sing. And only get one lollipop."

Thus ended our deep spiritual conversation. Upon further investigation (with a co-worker from Spain), I discovered that misa specifically refers to Mass. And as a child, I remember my experiences with Mass (with my Catholic grandparents) feeling about the same way. Poor kid. I'm thankful for Mollyanne and everyone volunteering with the kids' ministry at my church...hopefully giving our kids a slightly better impression of church!

And a completely unrelated but also funny story from earlier in the day:

We've read the book The Magic Hat by Mem Fox this week. The kids enjoy talking about what animal THEY would like to turn into if a magic hat landed on their heads. One girl informs me that she hopes to turn into a werewolf. And a vampire.

"Well, a vampire isn't really an animal," I inform her, "but I guess you could turn into one anyway."

"Yeah, I just really want to be a vampire," she said.


"Because...vampires get to bite people a lot."

"Oh, yeah. And do you like to bite people?"

"Oh, yes!! I've been biting people since I was four."

The end. 


  1. Cute! We went to a wedding once in Ecuador... it was in Spanish (duh) and Catholic (duh), so we were pretty much lost (and bored) the entire time. Good thing I got that Spanish degree so that won't happen again :)

  2. ohmygoodness. Kids say the cutest things!! I love their perspective on life.

  3. Lol! :) Thanks for that!

  4. Thanks for the job-related shout-out!

    I'm starting to get impatient for the new church website to launch. Now that I know how much better it's going to look, the current one just looks even more terrible to me.

    Also, did you get my text? Are you going tonight? I shall continue to contact you via different avenues until I hear a response.

  5. Greek Orthodox Mass is pretty boring too. I went as a kid.

  6. Upon reading the title of your entry, my mind went completely somewhere else. We just finished up a series at church called "How to Hug a Vampire: Loving people who suck the life put of us." It was fantastic.
    But that's neither here nor there.

    And now this post is awkward. Love your kid stories!

  7. Hahaha! I loved the vampire story :)

  8. least she owns being a biter. And I looove mem fox books.


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