Saturday, October 6, 2012


You want to know what's great about fall? Well, basically everything. I feel like such a traitor these days, feeling as passionately about fall as I do. For my whole life I was on Team Summer. You remember back in the mid-90s when the internet was first invented, except it wasn't really the internet yet, it was just Prodigy and AOL and CompuSomething? And all there was to do on the internet was go to chat rooms and make up lies about who you were and what your life was like and then spend the evening chatting with other lying strangers via your ultra-spotty dial-up connection? (Let me know if you want me to reveal my "online persona" of that time. I had a completely untrue identity and I STUCK TO IT, yall.) (Anyone remember when a/s/l? was a totally legit question and everyone knew what those letters stood for? Do people still use that question?) Anyway. Back then my chat room screen name was always "SummerGirl." Which was a really long and windy way to get to the point: I've always loved summer. But lately I'm just loving fall.

Last night Matt and I joined his family for some quintessential Fall Fun. First we hit up our favorite (year-round, hands-down) restaurant, Cali 'n Titos, for some delicious dinner (I had the fish burrito and maduros. HEAVENINMYMOUTH). THEN we went to the Athens Corn Maze for a little nighttime maze-exploration. I have only done a corn maze one other time, about 6 years ago, during the daytime. I enjoyed it. But last night was totally the bomb (still mentally thinking about 90s chat rooms, so it's okay to say "the bomb"). 

Don't you love the awesome quality of this picture? Just pretend it's still the 90s and roll with it. It would be amazing, back in the 90s, to even HAVE a photograph on your focus on that.

Anyway, Matt and I paired up with his uncle and cousin to dominate the maze, and for reasons I will never understand, they basically let me be the Maze Boss of the group. Despite the fact that I practically require a GPS to get out of my driveway, I ended up being the one calling the maze shots. It was amazing, but what was even more amazing was that I WAS AWESOME AT THE JOB. Apparently I have some sort of sixth sense for maze strategy or something. I just used my innate knowledge of corn, the North Star, and terrain navigation ("we're going uphill!! We're going downhill!! It's flat!! Crap, I'm the idiot wearing sandals and slipped in the mud again!!!") and I got us through that maze (including all 6 "check points", which qualifies us/me for a $25 restaurant gift card!) like a BOSS.

Is it weird and slightly unnatural to be this excited about figuring out a corn maze? Yes, probably. But I haven't experienced nearly enough winning in my life lately, so I'll take what I can get. And I'm unapologetically excited about being awesome at that maze. And now I sort of want to go to all the other corn mazes in Athens and see if I'm awesome at them, too. Luckily, there's plenty of fall left!

After the corn maze, we jumped on a hay ride, which was pretty high-quality as far as hay rides go. While waiting for the ride to start, Matt and I tried to take pictures and faced the age-old Taking Phone Pictures At Night quandaray: Flash or no flash?

Yeah, both options are pretty terrible. But whatever. I'm over it.

We finished off our night with a stop by the petting zoo. I was all about petting the baby cows, bunnies, goats, ponies, and pot-bellied pig, but I had to draw the line when they tried to convince me to pet the duck. Oh, he's nice, he doesn't bite, he's so soft! the little girl (who lived on the farm) tried to convince me. I let her know in no uncertain terms that I DO NOT TOUCH BIRDS and that's the end of the story. Back AWAY, farm girl, and take your soft, non-biting duck with you!

All in all, it was a fantastic fall night-- much better than sitting around and moping, which was what I was previously scheduled to be doing all evening. Now I'm trying to figure out if there's a way to make a living out of Corn Maze Domination. Do corn mazes need to hire, like...lifeguards? I could swoop in and rescue people who are not awesome at figuring out mazes? Could I design corn mazes? Could I join the competitive maze running circuit? Do I need to start one?

So many questions. Try not to be overwhelmed. And have a super fun fall weekend!

Signing off,
Erika B.
Maze Master 


  1. And now I want to move to Athens. That sounds like so much fun! I've never even heard of a corn maze, but I love it! And since you are clearly the corn maze master, I think there should be some kind of maze component at your Hunger Games Birthday Party. Time to put those skills to good use!

  2. I'm very impressed with your maze skills, because I, too, can't find my way out of a paper bag. True story: at small group the other night, when trying to leave the hosts' house, I walked down the hall to their bedroom thinking it was the hall to the front door.

    Also, my screen name was CookieAJN. When Allison and I shared one, it was CoolChix1213... and believe me, we were.

  3. I once peed in my pants in a Halloween maze in high school when a guy with a machete was chasing me. It was a great moment of my teens. Congrats on beating the maze! I knew you were a mad genius.

  4. I suck at corn mazes. So much so that I don't really like them. We are going to hit the total Fall circuit next weekend -- corn maze, pumpkin picking, etc. Sounds like we need to hire you to come help us out. What do you charge to navigate a slighly small-ish maze in Canada?!?!?!

  5. My screen name was SueCQ0915 and we thought were we so cool back then! How things have changed! I totally forgot about a/s/ was like we knew about text lingo before it existed!!! We were so smart :-)

  6. HA! a/s/l! I forgot all about that.

    I don't do corn mazes or haunted houses (other than Haunted Mansion at WDW!) There is a haunted maze here that everyone talks about. No, no, nope-ity, nope!

  7. I have real anxiety about doing a corn maze during the day time. But at night? I can just imagine how much I'd embarrass myself and my husband if I got scared and started crying. I know that seems extreme, but being trapped, in the dark, with things that will possibly jump out at me....CAN"T DO IT!


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